


hermosa

by mariuspunmercy



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: F/M, Inappropriate use of a Bayard, Jealous Lance (Voltron), Mutual Pining, Oblivious Pidge | Katie Holt, Platonic Kidge, cause i love their friendship, screw the timeline idk what it is either, why is that a tag & why am i using it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2019-04-20
Packaged: 2019-09-29 03:55:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 52,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17196050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariuspunmercy/pseuds/mariuspunmercy
Summary: Allura accidentally takes the others to alternate realities.Except they're not all alternates. And Pidge and Lance see something unexpected.





	1. you are more than just a dream

**Author's Note:**

> Playlist:  
> https://open.spotify.com/user/1q3f4d5e8oyyzytqmtt7e86j4/playlist/1GhMrqWemGDnKVNkmhXyna?si=FqlDhTnJQ1-eQQ06c-X3hw

Pidge's breath caught in her throat as Lance pressed his lips to hers. 

He grabbed her by the hips and took everything that was on her desk and slid it off with one arm. Oh well. Whatever Pidge had on there probably wasn't even important. 

Her fingers made their way to his hair, tangling in it as he took the scrunchie she had holding her hair in the ponytail out. He threw it somewhere to the side. Her hair tumbled around her shoulders, unable to make it past her collarbone. 

He untangled her hair, the pull of whenever he got a particularly rough knot sending shivers down her spine and  _ oh god this better not be a new kink that she's discovered.  _ Because that's an embarrassing one but it feels  _ nice.  _

The sigh that escaped her lips caused Lance to groan and lift her onto the desk. Her body slightly protested as he did it harshly with a slight sting, but she soon wasn't complaining as she felt his erection against her thigh. 

Lance gripped her shirt and only broke the kiss to pull it off of her. She was exposed in a grey bra that he was now studying with great interest. 

“So you're gonna keep staring or you gonna do something with them?” Pidge teased as he continued staring. She doesn't know where she got the confidence or ability from. How she's forming proper sentences is a mystery to her right now. 

“Fuck,” Lance groaned as he dug his face into the side of her neck. He cupped her breast and cradled them in his hands. His eyes were glued to them in her bra. “Fuck, Pidge…” 

A needy moan escaped her when Lance sucked on the sensitive part of her neck. His teeth bit the area where her neck and collarbone connect, and the slight sting seemed to make it better. He lavished the bite with his tongue that was just in her mouth and down her throat. 

“I forgot how much you love it when I kiss your neck there,” Lance smiled against her as he continued to leave a mark that Shiro was most definitely not going to believe was a mosquito bite like  _ last time.  _

“Lance,” she moaned out. “I swear to god right now…”

Who cares that it sounded aggressive and mean? Pidge wasn't about to let him get away with his kisses that she so desperately enjoyed, despite every bone in her body telling her to stop this now before they argue again. 

Who cares that they're in the castle right now and Shiro is probably going to burst in at any moment and stop this? She knew that her moans echoed around the room, and was most likely heard throughout the hallways. 

Who cares that after this, he may leave again and not turn back? Even the power of the female body isn't enough to make him stay, considering what happened two days ago. After something that wasn't even her fault. 

“This isn't a good idea,” she breathed as her ankles hooked around Lance's back to get him closer. He was so  _ close  _ already but she needed him to be closer. She needed to feel him and throw all caution to the wind and hook up on her desk right now. 

Maybe they shouldn't. With recent events, this is a horrible idea and is surely doing some kind of damage to what's going on between them. As if they needed this shit to be more complicated. 

“You know what wasn't a good idea?” Lance asked, nuzzling her shoulder. “When I completely screwed you over two days ago, and here we are in this position.”

“That was a very bad idea that I have not forgotten,” Pidge threw her head back as Lance's erection pressed more into the inside of her thigh and was nearly touching her. “But for the time being, I'll forget all about it.”

“Did you like that?” Lance ask, his lidded eyes meeting hers and he looked back up at her. “Did you like the way that I push myself against you? Do you want me to do it again?”

Pidge nodded as his covered dick touched her almost where she wanted to but not exactly there and she wanted to yell. She wanted to beg him to please  _ just touch her  _ but she would never let him know what he's doing to her body right now. 

With her head thrown back, Lance took his opportunity to attack her exposed neck. He didn't even kiss it, the desire and lust making him sloppy as he simply planted his lips and began ravishing her. She cried out and his fingers slipped a centimeter into her jeans. 

They weren't even fully inside of her jeans. His thumb was still outside, holding her in place as he began to slowly drag his fingers across the bare skin. 

“Do you want this?” Lance asked, his fingers teasing circles at her waist. “Do you want me to keep going?”

She moaned at his words and actions, as he began to push his covered hard on against her covered core. Clothed or not, it made her dizzy and she began moaning out. 

“Or do I stay like this? Keep touching you fully clothed because I don't deserve to see you after what I did?” Lance moved faster, his hips grinding against hers. The pressure was building up in her core. 

It was probably best to stop this right now. With the way that he messed her up not even a week ago and will probably do it again, she shouldn't be rewarding his cowardly actions with the pleasures her body was giving him.

He's  _ using  _ her. He's using her body for his own and she's doing the same back. She can't help but bite down on his shoulder as he put a hand on her ass to thrust faster. 

They're going to regret this as soon as it's done but it doesn't matter because she's feeling so good right now and he's making her feel amazing. His touch is completely undoing her. 

Lance started whispering sweet nothings into her ear, but Pidge wasn't paying attention. She focused on what was between her legs at the moment, seeing stars as he tried his best to get her with clothes on. 

In the back of her mind, she was thinking about how horrible this was. That he had hurt her, yet she ignored it because even though she doesn't like him very much in the moment, she likes the way that he's looking at her. 

The way he's watching her with such intensity in his eyes make her legs turn to jelly. She has to tighten her ankles around him because if not, she'd let go of him. Her legs are shaking as if he had really been rocking her.  

It's just the lust that's making her hyper aware of everything. To the cold desk that she's sitting on to the softness of his boxers. She could feel how his rough hands were digging into her waist and something was dripping down her leg. The pinching of her bra was something that she needed removed immediately. 

“Fuck, Lance,” she moaned, her nails digging crescent moons into his shirtless back. 

He laughed against her, finding her lips to kiss again. “C'mon, Katie. That's not what I want to hear you say. Speak, hermosa. Say what I want you to say.”

“Keep going, Lance,  _ please,”  _ she yelled, her real name being used making her whimper. She knew that speaking spanish was one of his weaknesses. “Por favor.”

Apparently that's what Lance wanted to hear since he unbuttoned her jeans and began to work as he dropped to his knees in front of her and-

*

“What the fuck?” Pidge asked when she looked at Allura through her feed. She was trying  _ so  _ hard not to lash out at a princess. “What the fuck did we just see?”

Allura shrugged, looking dismayed. “I tried to tap into other realities, but it seems that I might have accidentally brought along you four as well. I don't think it was too bad, though.”

Pidge was wide eyed and frantically panicking as she didn't listen to anything that Allura said. She felt an uncomfortable wetness between her legs, and she knew that stupid alternative reality made her aroused. 

“So that wasn't real?” She heard Lance ask, his voice way too high pitched for the way he normally talks. 

“In another reality, yes,” Allura looked troubled in the screen, though. “I may fear that it might've been the future. We all saw glances of ourselves, and I don't know what it is.”

Pidge froze. Her face was mildly red. She didn't believe anything that Allura said about  _ that  _ being the future. There's no way that her and Lance would ever do  _ that  _ in this timeline. 

“What do you mean?” Shiro asked, his face showing up in a screen alongside Allura. “You mean that what we just saw right now could be something that happens in the future?”

Allura looked away sadly. She nodded solemnly and upset. “I can't know for sure what that was. But what everyone saw couldn't have been that bad, right? Another reality or future, we know more now.”

Pidge shook her head, and Lance's face appeared in her lion. She knew it was a private call and not the group facetime or whatever due to the yellow outline around his screen

She physically jumped, almost falling out of her seat. She could hear Green laughing at her dismay. “Oh, Lance, hello. How are you this morning? Or evening? I don't know it's a little hard to tell when we're so far into space. We're on our way home, yay. I can't really tell where we're a right now or what time of day it is so I'll just say hi. Hi.”

Lance laughed at her rambling. His dark skin hid most of the blush spread on her cheeks. His ears were bright red, though. “I don't know if we saw the same thing but you're bright red and rambling so I'm guessing yes.”

“Did you see a very heavy make out session too?” Pidge asked, looking at him through her fingers. 

“You saw  _ what?” _ Lance asked, surprise all over his face. 

“You didn't see it?” She yelled as a question, and ignored Shiro's face on his screen. “So I probably just saw an alternate. I made this super weird and incredibly awkward. I totally didn't mean to say that. Just go the rest of your life never thinking about what I said right now ever again. No making out. Bye.”

But Lance laughed at her again. “I'm kidding. I saw it too. I wonder what I did that was so bad in that reality. I kept thinking about how I had hurt you or whatever. Oh well, guess that we'll never know what happens to that Pidge and Lance.”

Yeah, there's absolutely no way that's the future, like Allura said it might be. Only because she knows that she loves Lance, but it's not like he would ever actually return her feelings. It seems quite impossible that he would. It has to be some other universe. 

“I kept thinking that I should've put a stop to it  _ because  _ you hurt me,” Pidge laughed to ease the tension. “Funny how that works. Yet, they both seemed way too stupid to even attempt to put an end to what was going on there.”

“Well, that Lance is an idiot for hurting you, this reality or not, in the first place,” Lance looked at her and smiled. He seemed sad, because every time he was genuinely happy, his smile always reached his eyes. That was a known fact that everyone knew. And this one did not. 

“It's not like that'll happen anyways,” Pidge shrugged it off. She wanted to stop thinking about it because even though that Lance hurt her, she couldn't get over how damn good he felt pressed against her and how he attacked her neck with his kisses. 

If she's going to get hurt, is it worth it for that moment to get some kind of affection from him? Is Pidge really willing to make that wish for hoping it's the future so she could feel like he loves her back? 

It's too wishful thinking, because any other reality but that one they saw probably had Lance and Allura going down on each other. Everyone would believe it if that's what either of them saw, and not  _ Pidge  _ and Lance together. 

No, he wouldn't like her. She's a girl who dresses in boys clothes (although in that reality she had almost nothing on) and works around technology better than people. Allura is a space princess. Like she would ever try to compete with someone as beautiful and perfect as a freaking princess. 

“Imagine though?” Lance joked, rolling his eyes in another direction. “That would be pretty wild if it was the future, considering what we were doing.”

Nah, Pidge would be fine not imaging it. She would rather not fill her mind with the thought of doing that with Lance. Just because she knows that would never happen. 

“It's not like that would ever happen anyways,” she tried playing it off. Not much sense into trying to believe that something like that could actually happen. 

Plus, in that reality, he had hurt her. Lance had made the effort to hurt her. If any feelings were real there, then he wouldn't hurt her. He probably just rejected her. That wouldn't be a surprise.  

“Yeah, but what if it did?” Lance kept pushing it. His face was completely joking but his tone suggested otherwise. “I mean, that would be crazy man.”

“That's why it's never going to happen,” Pidge basically scoffed. “I'm literally freaking out about something from another damn universe. Ha! I shouldn't be with how wild it was.”

“Freaking out here too,” Lance put up a finger as an indicator that he was talking. “It's just that I'm way better at being able to do it on the inside while you show visible panic.”

“Sorry, it's the space depression.”

“Pidge!” Shiro yelled, making both of them jump. While Lance may have turned off the call, Pidge had definitely left hers on. Meaning that everyone heard everything that they had said.

_ Oh god.  _

“Sorry,” Pidge put her hands up in defense. She wasn't really apologizing for the depression jokes that Shiro says not to make for the sake of their mental health, but more for making them all listen in on that conversation. 

That should've been private. It should've been a private conversation that was between her and Lance. Guess that can't happen when three other people are listening in. 

It's not those other three people's fault, per say. It's more Lance's for calling her at that moment. But they could've easily disconnected them from the call. No real reason to keep them in it. 

“So what exactly happened in what you guys saw?” Hunk asked, a smile way too big spread across his face. 

“Not much,” Pidge shrugged. “I'm gonna be completely honest, it really wasn't much of a big deal.”

“Hmm.” Even Allura cracked a small smile. “I guess we could head back to the castle. We could discuss our, ahem,  _ realities  _ with Keith and see if has anything to add.”

“You mean we have to talk about what we saw with Keith?” Lance yelled. “Why do we have to explain this to Keith? I don't want to talk about anything with Keith.”

Speak of the devil and he shall appear because Keith's face appeared on her Lion. He looked around frantically and wide eyed, eyes boring into everyone. 

“Look, I don't really know how to explain it but I think I saw the future,” Keith spoke. 

“Okay, what the fuck,” Pidge had no emotion as she cursed, and ignored Shiro's warning side eye. 

Another little something that Shiro had suggested for the sake of them staying PG-13 in space; everyone is allowed to say fuck twice everyday. More than two and you get grounded. 

“I had a dream right now when I took a nap, and it was all black or whatever. But I had this prophetic feeling? I don't know, but I'm really tripping out right now,” Keith groaned. 

Impossible. No way. He's misreading whatever was in his dream because there's no way what they saw right now is something that happens in the future. 

Pidge caught Keith's small cough. He wasn't telling the truth. She seemed to be the only one to notice though, since no one else made an effort to ask what was wrong. 

Catching Keith's eye, he looked down immediately. He tried not to look up again, but ultimately ended up staring at her. He blew air out. 

“So Keith really is a fortune teller,” Lance nodded, his voice sounding very squeaky. “Hmm, nice.”

His voice sounded way too high pitched, and Pidge stifled laughter. Lance caught her attention and ran a hand through his hair, smiling sweetly. 

Of course he tries to act all buddy buddy with her now. Considering what they had just seen right now, they had been  _ very  _ close and personal with one another. More buddy buddy than she ever thought possible. 

“We're heading back to the castle right now,” Allura informed. “We'll explain to you everything we saw. I didn't see much, but I'm guessing the others did.”

Yep, sure did see a lot! She's really that excited to talk to Keith about it. Let's casually tell Lance's rival that she saw herself making out and what she's pretty sure a hookup.  

Lance cleared his throat. “I think I'll pass on explaining to Keith. I'd be much better off going the rest of my life without Keith knowing.”

She caught Keith's eye on the screen, and nodded at him. He gave her a swift thumbs up to show that he understood what she was trying to say; she'll explain it to him later. 

They all changed course towards the castle where Keith would be meeting them. 

*

“What happened?” Keith questioned as everyone all came in running. 

“We need to tell you what we saw in case it's anything you can help us with,” Shiro declared. “I guess I'll go first, then.” He led them all to the living room, where they all sat down on the couches to hear what Shiro had to say. 

“I don't know exactly what answers that I can give you guys,” Keith warned. “So like, please don't think that I can give you a solution with this all because I… really can't.”

Shiro nodded, and then began. “Well, we were on Olkarion.”

Pidge got excited for the first time since she saw her and Lance. She sat up straighter, and even knocked a pillow off of the couch as she got all giddy. Lance laughed at her, and put the pillow back in its place. Can Shiro's thing please be future? She would love to go back. 

“We were discussing something with the Olkari,” he continued, a small smile on his face. “It seemed to be something good. We were all enjoying ourselves. Well, most of us, at least.”

Allura frowned at him. “What do you mean?”

Shiro cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck. “Ahem, there were two missing. I don't know where Pidge and Lance were, but the rest of all were talking fine with the Olkari. We were all laughing at something they had told us, minus you two.”

Pidge wanted to  _ die.  _ She wanted to melt into the sofa because  _ how embarrassing.  _ She first finds out that she had a heavy make out session with her friend, and in Shiro's thingy, he had seen everyone but the two of them? 

Especially on Olkarion? She wanted to be there with them! She wanted to be laughing and hanging out with her friends, too. Not missing alongside Lance for some reason. Why Lance of all people? 

Looking at Lance's red face, she knew hers matched his. His lion must be envious of the shade of red their faces were. No one else knew what happened in their thing, though, so no one else can get the wrong idea like they both had. 

Hunk cracked a smile at this. “Wait, so all of us, excluding Lance and Pidge, were doing something fun with the Olkari? Except for the two of them? We were all there? Minus Pidge and Lance?”

Okay, everyone. Laugh it out. First of all, her crush on Lance isn't even that obvious. Second, they didn't know. The fullest extent that they knew was making out, but not what Lance was about to do to her right until Allura had dragged them all back to the present. 

Shiro nodded, clearly trying to keep in all laughter. “Exactly. Even Keith was there, so I'm guessing in that reality you're probably still a paladin. Except Pidge and Lance. We don't know what happened to you two.”

Before anyone else could crack a joke, Keith thankfully saved them by holding his hand up. “I think that we should go to Olkarion to see if this is true. And then if everything from what you saw happened, then we'll know for sure if it was the future or an alternate reality.”

Pidge gave Keith a thumbs up, not really knowing if she wants it to be the future or not. If it's the future, then she gets to go to Olkarion. She loves it there, and she's sure that Olkari would be equally excited to see her again. She wants to go to Olkarion again. 

The downside is… If they do end up going back, then she's not even going to be there for long. Because according to Shiro, her and Lance are mysteriously gone. Unless they're not really and Shiro is holding something back to save them from further embarrassment.

Oh no- what if the reason that her and Lance are missing is because their doing  _ that  _ from what they had seen? Wait, no. It's impossible because during the thing, she kept thinking about what had happened two days ago. And it was not going to take two days to get to the other planet, so Lance can't screw her over in that time. 

Okay, crisis averted. 

“We'll change course to Olkarion right away,” said Coron before running off. 

“Alright, I know you've all been dying to hear what happened to me,” Hunk did a pretend hair flip. “Just kidding, I actually want to hear what happened with Pidge and Lance, but I'll save them and explain what I saw first. You're welcome, you two.”

Pidge mumbled a silent thank you, but saw Lance all tense next to her. Poor dude. He's probably only upset that he didn't end up with Allura in every reality possible. 

“I was with Keith, I don't know why, and get this,” Hunk smiled brightly. “We were on Earth. Except, I did something weird.”

Everyone's attention snapped to this. Keith was the first one to question it. “You mean in what you saw, it was on Earth? What was the weird thing that you did?”

Hunk laughed loudly. “You are not going to believe me.” He stayed silent while the others waited for him to continue. “I was proposing to you. You said yes.”

And Pidge thought what her and Lance saw was bad. 

Everyone started howling with laughter at the thought of Hunk and Keith ending up married. Keith said yes, too. That's definitely gotta be an alternate reality because Hunk is with Shay, and Keith… It's Keith. 

Keith smiled and shook his head. “That's most definitely an alternate reality because of what I saw. Also, no offense Hunk, I just don't think you're very much my type.”

Hunk patted him on the back. “None taken. I wouldn't date someone like you or me either.”

“Well, now offense was taken,” Keith pouted at him. “I saw myself getting married too. Except, I couldn't see my partner,” he cut off Hunk as the other boy raised an arm. “No, you were the one officiating the wedding. I couldn't even tell if it was a boy or girl, so I dunno.”

“You weren't even with us, though?” Was the first thing that Lance has said since they had all sat down to talk. “And didn't you say that you saw all black?”

Keith didn't answer him, and instead turned to look at Allura. Okay, Pidge was definitely going to question him about that later. He was hiding something about what he saw. She narrowed her eyes at him, waiting for him to look at her. When he did, he mouthed ‘Later' to her. 

“Did you see anything worth noting?” Keith asked Allura. 

“I'm the one who brought everyone along with me, but all I saw was someone with white, long hair,” Allura stated. “He was definitely Galran, but his ears looked Altean. All I saw was him in the control center of Zarkon's ship. I have no clue what to think of this.”

That's… Odd. To see some random dude in what could either be the future or a whole other damn reality. Some guy who has no relation to anybody that they know. How weird? 

“So you saw a guy that you've never seen before with long white hair who was Galran, but had Altean features?” Keith asked. 

“Definitely.”

“Strange,” Keith turned and looked Lance in the eye, almost challenging. “And what did you see?”

Pidge started coughing loudly because  _ god help him  _ if Lance begins to spew all of the embarrassing details from what they had seen. She  _ will  _ throw hands with the person who may be her future… Whatever. 

“What's wrong?” Keith asked with an innocent expression on his face. Oh, but his eyes held all sorts of mischief. He knew exactly what he was doing. “You need water?”

“Yes, actually,” Pidge stood up. This would probably be her chance to get Keith alone so she could  _ privately  _ discuss what they had seen. With no one else around to hear her tell Keith what she had been doing with Lance. “Wanna come with?”

It was probably the look on her face with an urgent expression. Whatever it was, Keith seemed to understand what she had been trying to do. “I do.” He stood up and followed her out of the room. 

As soon as the door was closed, Pidge broke into a run towards the kitchen. “Hurry up before Lance follows us.” Lance may try to get into the conversation too, and she would prefer not seeing him right now. 

“Why don't you want Lance to follow?” Keith asked as he held the door to the kitchen open. It wasn't that far, and Lance was probably already on his way. She needed to make this quick. 

“I don't know how to explain what we saw,” Pidge started as she leaned against the kitchen counter. 

“What do you mean ‘we',” Keith asked, standing parallel to her. 

“Mine and Lance's thing was shared,” she sighed. “Everyone else's was solo but me and him saw the exact same thing.”

“What is it that you guys saw?” Keith asked, except he had already started smiling. “Although, I think I have an idea how what it was.”

Pidge groaned. Here it is. Just jump into the water. No point in dipping in inch by inch when he could already guess what they had seen. It was just… So embarrassing to have to talk about seeing her crush doing  _ that  _ (or about to) with her. 

“We were… making out,” she lifted herself onto the counter. “Like, heavy making out. Tongue and neck and all that. I'm pretty sure we were going to… you know. Except Allura pulled us all back to the present before either of us could see.”

Keith nodded, taking it in. “Imma tell you what I saw since you trusted me,” he paused for a bit. “I  _ did  _ see who I was marrying. It was the future, too. Hunk is the only one who saw another universe or reality or whatever.”

“Who was it?” This had definitely peaked Pidge's interest, and was thankful for the few seconds as she focused her attention on who Keith was destined to marry. She ignored his comment about Hunk being the only one who didn't see the future. 

“It's pretty weird,” Keith focused on the ground. “I was marrying Allura.”

“What?” Pidge yelled a little loudly. She covered her mouth. “What?” She asked quieter. Keith only nodded. So Keith and  _ Allura  _ end up together? That's definitely something that was unexpected. Damn, how is Lance going to react. 

Oh, yeah. Lance. 

“Were you thinking about anything while you and Lance were doing your thing?” Keith asked, blushing wildly. “Because I kept thinking about how I almost died a week before my own wedding, but I was able to somehow make it back fine.”

Pidge blew air out as she thought about what she had been thinking. “It was mainly about how I needed him to be closer to me, and how he had hurt me two days prior. Plus, something about a mosquito.”

“So, sometime in the future, you and Lance are going to have issues, that's for sure,” Keith sat down on the counter next to her. 

“And you're going to marry Allura,” she ran a hand through her hair. What does this mean for the dynamic of the team? How was Keith just able to talk to his future  _ wife  _ with a straight face? She started dying coughing when he only asked Lance about what they had seen. 

“It's all going to happen,” Pidge buried her face into her hands. “Lance is going to be so upset when someone tells him that he ends up with me instead of Allura. He hurt me, so he obviously doesn't care.”

It seems impossible. Now she knows that her and Lance are going to kiss and do all of that sometime in the future. They're still in the castle, so it's before they go back to Earth. It's going to be sometime in the next two years. 

Even with a two year warning, it seems like too little of time. She doesn't want to kiss Lance under circumstances where all she could think about was how good he felt and how he was just going to leave her again. 

It's not even kissing with feelings. All they were doing was trying to take out their lust on each other. While Pidge definitely had feelings on her end on of the stick, Lance doesn't. There's no way that he would. 

“Future or not, you guys are still the best of friends,” Keith comforted. “You know that I don't say whatever to cheer people up. I don't think he does anything intentionally. He cares so much about you. Trust me, we all know it.”

Pidge was about to say something, but was quickly interrupted by the door of the kitchen opening. She expected it to be Lance, and rolled her eyes at how uselessly jealous he gets of anybody around Keith. Didn't their stupid rivalry end, already.

Instead, it was Hunk. He walked in with a face lit up like a Christmas tree. “We're arriving to Olkarion in around two vargas. Pidge don't sneak off with Lance anywhere.”

Pidge groaned, and Keith's laughter that filled the room only made her embarrassment worse. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song Inspirations for this story:  
> Woke The F*ck Up - Jon Bellion  
> Out of My League - Fitz & The Tantrums  
> Lo Que Siento - Cuco
> 
> Chapter titles are songs from before like 2015 okay
> 
> I really dunno how this story is gonna work but we'll see
> 
> My tumblr - soleaa
> 
> :)


	2. you didn't have to cut me off

Pidge pressed her face to the window of her lion to get a better look at Olkarion. 

She was so happy to see her old friends again. She could see many of them already gathered on the floor. She sped up her lion and started racing to the ground. She was  _ so  _ ready to greet her friends. 

“Woah there,” Keith laughed at her eagerness. He needed to be somewhere now that he's not a Paladin, so he was riding with Pidge in Green. “Don't forget, we're all here to figure out what was happening in Shiro's vision, so don't get too excited.”

“But all the pretty robots,” Pidge whined. “Can't we see them? I want to go see them. That's probably why I'm missing. I'm chatting it up with one of the Olkari about their tech.”

It's the only plausible reason. There's no other reason that she should be missing. Nothing else that she could possibly think of that would make her separate from the group. Only their tech would make her excited enough to leave. 

“That doesn't explain why Lance is missing,” Hunk reminded. “The both of you are gone.”

“He's probably flirting with some random Olkari,” Pidge rolled her eyes. The Olkari girls don't even seem that impressed by Lance's theatrics, so he doesn't have a chance. The jealousy she had in the back of her head made her want to crash her lion into his. Their argument earlier made her want to throw as many insults at him as she could. 

“Never,” Lance stated. “Besides, how do you guys even know that us not being there are related? I could be in the bathroom at the exact same time as Pidge is chilling with the robots.”

Keith turned off her mic, so now no one can hear what was happening in her lion. “Do you think that they're related? You and Lance disappearing, I mean.”

She had to think about it. Where could they possibly be? Because if even Keith is present and she's not, then there's got to be something going on. It's all too convenient if they both mysteriously leave at the same time. 

“Honestly?” Pidge tells Keith. “Yeah. It seems like too much of a coincidence that, based on what we recently saw, me and him just happen to be gone at the same time. There's no way that happens. Plus, with our disagreement earlier.”

Keith tapped his fingers against her thigh as he crouched next to her. It's a nervous habit that she's noticed he has. While he definitely isn't a toucher, he tries to keep his hands as busy as possible while scared. That usually means putting his hands on other people. 

“I don't know what I'm going to do the next time me and Allura are alone,” Keith admitted, his fingers slightly speeding up. “I freaked out when she offered to take me in her lion.”

“Yeah, that was funny,” Pidge recalled how when they were figuring out where Keith was going to go, how he had gone all wide-eyed and started to lightly hit Shiro on his real arm as he stared straight at Pidge. 

_ “So, who's taking Keith with them?” Shiro asked everybody. “As much as Black loves you, he's not all that happy about taking other people in, so someone else has to take you.” _

_ “I am not dealing with Keith either,” Lance had no hesitation in his comment. “See? Me and Black have so much in common. You know, I should be the one piloting him. Bet he'd really love me-” _

_ “Har har,” Keith mocked. “I guess I'll-” _

_ “You could come with me,” Allura interrupted with a smile. “Blue would absolutely love to take you in.” _

_ Keith's eyes shot open wide. He had the same look that Mii's from the Wii had with the full blown eyes. He was definitely caught off guard at his future wife offering him a ride in her lion.  _

_ Pidge understood when he caught her eye as he drove his fist into Shiro's arm softly, the way a kid might when impatient. “I could always take Keith with me. I know both me and Green are more than willing to.” _

_ He breathed a great sigh of relief, and went to stand next to her. “I'm fine going with her, considering that Hunk didn't even offer.” _

_ “Damn it,” Hunk whispered from behind Coran. “I thought that if I stayed as hidden as possible that I wouldn't be caught.” _

_ “Hold up,” Lance made an X with his arms. “Time. So who exactly is Keith going with?” _

_ Pidge raised her hand. “Me.” _

_ Lance shook his head. “No, I don't think so. I'll take Keith with me instead. Red is fine with her ex-Paladin riding with us. I'm fine taking him with me. You're riding with me, Keith. You're good, Pidge. I'll be taking him with me.” _

_ “What?” Pidge looked at him quizzically. “I mean, if you really want to then I…” She trailed off at Keith's slight shake of the head. He wanted to ride with her, and there's probably good reason for that too. Did he have more information?  _

_ “What?” Lance asked at seeing her pause.  _

_ “I said never mind,” she tried to get Keith to back her up, but he was suddenly interested in the back of his hand. “I'm fine, Lance. I'll be the one taking Keith.” _

_ Saying his name so normally brought her back to literally two vargas before when she had seen herself moaning out his name. It sounded so familiar against her mouth. She would yell his name as he beat her at video games like regular but it was different now.  _

_ She quickly won the quick Keith debate as Lance stormed out of the room, muttering something under his breath. Everyone else was left too stunned and confused to run after him to see what the hell that was.  _

_ Lance wasn't even seen again until they were getting ready to leave. He didn't say much, and no one knew why he was so mad. Well, at least Pidge didn't know. She was confused as to why the others kept stealing glances at her.  _

“I honestly have to thank you for saving my ass back there,” Keith chuckled. “I was not about to be in a lion with Allura, who I have no marry sometime in the future. And there's no way in hell that I was going to be alone with Lance.

“Why's that?” Pidge asked out of pure curiosity. “You looked pretty scared to ride with Lance.”

“It's not Lance that I'm afraid of,” Keith told her. “Oh, I know that I could take Lance anyday. It's what he was probably going to tell me that made me flip. We all know Lance too well to not know what he's thinking.”

“What did he want to say?” Pidge asked, slightly embarrassed. 

Okay, one little disagreement over Keith of all people isn't going to make her and Lance suddenly stop being friends. They're best friends, and that's not going to change with Lance being petty and childish. 

Her and the Lance making out in the future, however, very much changed the dynamic of their friendship. She was too scared to be alone with him in fear of her desire getting too mixed up with her feelings and she kisses him on the spot. 

“A warning, most likely,” Keith nodded his head as Pidge carefully landed (parked?) Green on the planet. “He wants me to stay away from his girl.”

“Does he know about Allura?” Pidge asked, trying to keep all of her excitement over the Olkari starting to make a crowd around the arriving lions.

“I'm not talking about Allura.”

When she turned to question him, Keith had already stood up and had started walking out of her look. So, she jumped out of her seat quickly and ran to meet him. Her earlier worry and initial confusion was all replaced by excitement to see the Olkari once again. 

“I can't explain to you how long I've been waiting for this,” Pidge tapped Keith's shoulder to avoid hitting anyone out of the glee emitting from her.

“No but you can keep hitting me,” Keith gently grabbed her hand. He didn't mean anything by it. He ends up married to Allura so everything is kinda whatever. She ends up making out with Lance sometime in the future so her feelings don't diminish or anything. 

But she heard a frustrated groan behind her. Pidge turned around and found herself almost face to face with Lance. Hoping that he had calmed down from earlier, she took her hand from Keith's and waved at him. Lance ignored her and kept walking towards the Olkari. 

Okay, no. No, he's not going to ruin her day on Olkarion because he's in a pissy mood that no one even knows for what. If he was going to ignore her, then she was going to do it back. She doesn't need Lance pulling any shit right now by being stubborn and annoying. 

“Friends, welcome!” Ryner, their leader, greeted to the Paladins. 

“Hello,” Shiro greeted back, his hand outstretched. Ryner shook it, a smile on both of their faces. “We have come with the intent of only visiting.”

“I can show you all our biggest inventions since you lot have left,” Ryner clapped her hands together. She narrowed her eyes at Pidge, and then at Lance who was standing feet away from her. “One of those being an emotion reader.”

Lance stiffened up. So did Pidge. She didn't know what to say to that. The only emotions that she had right now were being very excited and slightly pissed off. Maybe Ryner could feel the negative emotions coming off of Lance with whatever they made. 

On that thought… “I would love to see what you guys have made if you'd allow me,” Pidge politely asked. 

“Of course,” Ryner smiled sweetly. “If you would all follow me…”

Pidge started to walk alongside everyone else when she felt someone tap on her shoulder. She turned around and saw Ryner, who was literally just in front of her. How…?

“You and him, follow me.” She didn't even notice that Lance had been watching Ryner too. 

They both stole a glance at each other before walking with Ryner. Pidge can feel the thick tension in the air. It's weird how all Lance did was blow up a little and she ended up getting some of the result. 

Ryner led them to one of the buildings with only a door. Pidge found it a bit odd how there were no windows, but decided to ignore it in respect for whatever cultural designs that they have on the houses. 

“We have invented a device to read the emotions of others,” Ryner explained, opening the door. “It uses another person's quintessence, and we get the reading from it to us. This has proved itself very helpful.”

Pidge nodded, interested in whatever other inventions they had. She wanted to be with the others, learning. As much as she loves Ryner, she wanted to hear about what the others were doing right now. 

Wait. 

Her and Lance are alone. They're alone, and everyone else is gone. Shiro and all the others knew that they were going to be separated. How is it that it actually happened? Ryner motioned them into the house, which only had a couch. 

“I'm sorry, but I'm afraid that negative emotions are something that us on Olkarion are trying to get under control,” Ryner explained. “That's why we have the people talk it out. We'll come back when we feel you've made up.”

With that explanation, Ryner smiled at them one last time before closing the door. Lance reached to open it, but the clicking of a lock told them that they were not going to leave for a while. Which meant that they actually had to talk. 

“Can I ask you something?” Pidge questioned. Lance raised an eyebrow at her in response, waiting for whatever question she was going to throw at him. 

“Shoot.” Was his only reply. 

“Why is it that you went off on and disappeared earlier?” Pidge crossed her arms, standing directly in front of him as he leaned against the locked door. 

Lance walked away from her, instead going to the couch. He didn't sit on the sofa itself, instead choosing to stand in front of the arm rest. “I don't think you'll be all the eager to hear it.”

“What?” Pidge followed him to where he was now, sitting on the armrest in front of him. “I do care, matter of fact. I would think that after what we saw that you would a least give a single damn at how your actions affect me too.”

See, that's what Lance doesn't understand. He doesn't get that everything that he does has some kind of impact on her. Him making a fuss about whatever had made him mad also makes  _ her  _ mad too. That's how it's going to be now. 

“Why would I do that when you're the one who can't even glance in my direction?” Lance scoffed, looking away from her and focusing on the parallel arm rest. 

“Me in  _ your  _ direction?” Pidge rolled her eyes. What does he mean by that? “Oh, yeah. I completely forgot. I'm sorry for what you saw and that you didn't go down on some goddess in at least one dimension!”

Where did the anger come from? She really can't tell you. She felt angry that he's whining about her actions when he can't even be bothered to take into consideration the others around him. 

“What the hell do you mean?” Lance furrowed his eyebrows at her. 

“I mean that you're getting all angry over here for something that isn't my fault!” Pidge yelled, jabbing a finger in his face. “I didn't mean to make out with you in any reality! I sure as hell didn't mean to make you mad! I don't even know why you're upset at me!”

“Because you're so fucking oblivious!” Lance yelled back. “I didn't want you riding in the lion with Keith for what I thought were obvious reasons! C'mon, Pidge! Why else wouldn't I want you with Keith?”

It took her all two seconds to think. “You didn't want him riding with Allura and you didn't want to make it obvious so you instead put it on me!”

A huge stretch, even for someone like Pidge. While she definitely is an over thinker for everything, that one seemed too big. But she needed a comeback on the spot. It's way harder to insult people under that pressure. 

“For fucks sake!” Lance ran a hand through his hair impatiently. “For someone as smart as you, you can be really freaking stupid at times!”

“You're calling me stupid?” She resorted. There's many things that he can get away with, her having a crush and all, but calling her stupid isn't one of those. “Why the hell am I the stupid one? I'm not the one who got all pissed off at going into a lion with Keith!”

“Why do you have to bring up Keith?” Lance was standing super close to her now. His legs were pressed up against her knees. “I don't want to talk about Keith or Allura or anyone else in that damn castle. You're the only one that I want to talk to right now!”

Pidge scoffed. There's no real reason, and he doesn't even provide logic. “Why's that? Because I'm the one that you kiss in another reality? I'm the worst people person out of everybody!”

That's one of the reasons that he would never like her. That's one of the reasons that he'd probably choose Allura any day. That's why she can't believe Keith about it being the future. It has to be another reality because Lance would never like her. 

“Do you think that I care about stuff like that?” Lance now had his hands on the arm rest next to her, caging her in. “No, Pidge! I don't! I want to talk to you right now! So please, tell me why you ignored what I said about me being able to take Keith with me?”

Pidge blushed red, but that's mainly because she knows how hard it is to lie to him. She can't tell him the real reason why she needed to ride with Keith. “What happened to not wanting to talk about anyone else?”

“What happened to us being best friends?” He asked in a quieter voice. “What happened to us being able to share everything together but one stupid alternative reality has you all on edge! Is the idea of us being together so bad that you have to talk to Keith now?”

“No!” Pidge pushed him away from her so she could get some space. “It's not anything like that a all! It's because Keith told me what we saw is the future! Do you know what that means? It means that we're going to do that in the future and  _ that  _ terrifies me!”

“Why does it scare you so bad?” Lance tried walking in again to close the space, but she put a hand up to stop him. “Pidge, what is it that's bothering you so bad?”

“I didn't mean to ruin anything,” Pidge crossed her arms and flopped backwards onto the couch. “I know how much you like Allura and I felt bad for ruining your future with her. I'm more angry at myself then at you. The only reason you got me mad was your thing earlier.”

“What makes you think that?” Lance asked, cautiously taking steps towards her. “What makes you think that I want a future with Allura?”

“You're not exactly subtle,” she mumbled. He's only asking because he's scared that he's being too forward with Allura. “Everyone else on the ship knows. I just don't think that she does.”

“You say that everyone else knows about my so-called feelings for Allura except for her?” Lance raised an eyebrow (he does that a lot) and even cracked a small smile. What is this dude smiling about? There's nothing much. 

“Exactly.” And that made her heart hurt. That is what made Pidge doubt everything. She didn't doubt that Allura and Keith end up married. They do subtly flirt a lot. But her and Lance? Yeah, that's absolutely never going to happen. 

“Why?” Lance started to raise his voice again. “I don't understand why you're like this! Why do you have to try to put everything on everyone else but yourself? Tell me, Pidge! Please, go on and tell me!”

“That's not what I'm trying to say and you fucking know that,” Pidge had a warning edge in her voice. She was about to start swinging at her crush. “You know damn well that's not what I'm trying to say.”

“Then what  _ are  _ you saying?” Lance sounded exasperated. “What are you trying to say? I know that my angry emotions come out of a place where I can at least defend myself. What's your excuse for being mad at me?”

“I wasn't even mad until we got off of the lions and you ignored my greeting of hi!” Pidge ran a hand through her hair as she sat up from the coach. “I waved hi to you and you kept ignoring me in favor of being petty! Why?”

But Pidge never got to know why as she heard the explosion. 

*

  


“Sorry, Paladins!” Ryner apologized for the mess as everyone scrambled into the dining room where they had just been eating. “They're working on something new and-”

Pidge and Lance burst into the room, bayards equipped. They both paused at seeing the way that the others looked at them. Pidge cleared her throat and lowered her bayard, Lance following by example. 

“Please, sit,” Ryner gestured to the empty seats at the table which were across from each other. Pidge sat in the one next to Keith just so she can spite Lance. It worked immediately, as he glared at Keith and sat down at the other chair. 

“What is it that you said you were working on?” Shiro asked, politely smiling. His question had eased the awkward tension in the room, which very clearly worked. Ryner went back to grinning at everyone. 

“A forgetting chip,” Ryner tapped something on her wrist. A hologram of a small, black chip appeared. “Some of the people have experienced some traumatic things since the war began, and we wanted to help them.”

“How nice of you!” Allura exclaimed, making Keith quirk an eyebrow at Pidge. She silently laughed at how he was having a huge reaction to everything that Allura did now. Whether it be his eyebrow movement or how he makes use of his hands, he does something. 

Pidge pretended not to notice the way that Lance was staring at her. What was he looking at? Her having a friendly laugh? She turned to face Ryner, who was sitting at the head of the table. “How exactly does this work?”

“Thanks for asking,” a sigh of relief escaped from Ryner. “It takes the old quintessence of an Olkari and removes it, also removing the Olkari of the memory that they wished to be gone. The explosion earlier was caused from the quintessence that they've collected since we started creating this device.”

Ha, wouldn't that be something great to have with them right now. Pidge could forget all about what her and Lance saw. She could even give it to Keith so that his marriage is a surprise instead of an expectation. 

Wait. 

“How do you insert it into a person?” Pidge asked, suddenly tapping her foot up and down rapidly. “Or an Olkari, I should say.”

“We cut open their arm and insert it into their veins!”

“Oh.”

Keith snickered at her response. He hid it behind his hand, smiling at her. She gave him a playful glare because if he keeps smiling at her the way that he is, there's no way that she isn't going to be able to stop laughing. 

“It's actually quite painless,” Ryner reassured, looking at the surprised looks around the table. “I could take you, Pidge, to take a peek at it if you'll allow me.”

Pidge's eyes blew wide in surprise and happiness. She nodded, and Shiro chuckled at her over eagerness. “I would love to!” 

Ryner stood up from the table, Pidge doing the same thing. She followed Ryner out of the dining room. “By the way, that… therapy house or whatever blew up. That's how me and Lance were able to get out. I think we came out of it worse than we did going into it. All he could do now is stare at me in sadness.”

But Ryner only chuckled. “Dear Katie, do you really think that I would actually try to  _ help  _ the Paladins?”

“What?” The only people who ever used Pidge's full name was her family, and even then Matt regularly calls her Pidge. Lance is probably the only of the Paladins to call her Katie, and that's when he's mad. Or in their future… 

The only people to call her Katie were the people who knew her the best. The only other people are… enemies. 

Pidge whirled around on Ryner quickly, but the leader was quicker. She grabbed Pidge by the wrist and pulled her into a door. Pidge was left alone with Ryner. She turned on her coms. “Guys, something is wrong! She's got me and you have to lea-”

Before finishing what she had to tell her team, Ryner forcibly took the helmet off of Pidge and threw it to the floor. The helmet shattered, along with Pidge's hopes of her being rescued. Looks like she's got herself into a situation. 

“I don't think you'll be going anywhere,” Ryner smiled, and got close to Pidge's face. She grabbed the other girl by the shoulders and pushed her onto the floor. She was suddenly aware of all of the poles in the room. Does Olkarion have strip clubs? 

Pidge began to crawl away as quickly as she could, but Ryner stayed at her toes. The Olkari grabbed one of her wrist and put handcuffs on her. Except they had green and red lights twinkling through them like those cell phone chargers you would see on Earth. 

Of fucking  _ course  _ the evil girl had handcuffs on her and was currently attempting to drag her to the nearest pole. That's when Pidge noticed the other poles had unoccupied handcuffs. Okay, Olkarion strip clubs are definitely more hardcore than the ones on Earth. 

“What the hell are these for?” Pidge asked, trying to make herself as heavy as possible. But that wasn't going to happen because of how tiny and skinny she is. Ryner was having no problem whatsoever dragging her. 

“They drain your quintessence,” Ryner got all up in Pidge's face as she paused for a second. “I told you all about our latest inventions. They all use quintessence, and we need some to experiment on. Yes, yours should do very well. You'll feel it in a couple ticks.”

That's when Pidge noticed what was wrong. Ryner's eyes had a purple outline around the iris of her eyes. Before Pidge could question it too badly, she felt pain sting all throughout her body. It felt like nothing before.

Screaming out in pain apparently made it way easier for Ryner to handcuff her to a pole because she was soon gripping it with white knuckles, trying  _ anything  _ to subdue the pain. 

It felt like a thousand knives were entering her body at different times. They all moved in her slowly, one at a time, but still feeling the effects of it everywhere. She wanted to kick and scream, but her body felt too weak for that. 

“That's the natural quintessence that your body has leaving,” Ryner chuckled at her, putting a hand on her chin. “I honestly wish that we could get this done quicker so that I can get on with my experiments up and running.”

Pidge wanted to reply with a snarky response about how her planet wasn't even running before Voltron came to save their asses, but couldn't talk as her tongue felt like it had been cut off and the inside of her mouth had fire in it. 

“Maybe a couple of broken bones can get the quintessence traveling out of your body sooner,” Ryner smirked at her. “It shouldn't be that hard to break a couple of bones. Especially on somebody who's so tiny.”

When Ryner grabbed her hand and examined her fingers, Pidge was scared by the way that they had lost their natural color and had started turning a greyish color. Hands shouldn't be that color, should they? 

“Left handed, am I right?” Ryner was stroking her arm. Pidge couldn't tell you which arm it was, only that the contact made her wince in pain. “You won't need any arm once I'm done doing my job here.”

Almost as soon as Pidge felt Ryner begin tugging and the crack that emitted from her ring finger, and the scream that she let out, the door to the room they were in flew open. 

“Don't you touch her!” Lance, she thinks, yelled at Ryner. 

Pidge felt a slight burn, but seconds after that, she felt some of her energy return as her hand was free from the handcuffs and the pole she was just connected with had been blown to a thousand pieces. 

In all honesty, Pidge didn't feel the break. All she felt was pain, but she had broken her pinky before, and the pain from that had been worse than the one she experienced from her left ring finger today. 

She definitely felt it after, though. The way that the finger bent in an odd direction made her realize what had happened and she tried to scream out but she felt  _ so tired.  _

“Pidge?” Lance crouched beside her. When had he gotten here? He grabbed her left hand, but when she winced and whimpered, he quickly let it go and went for the right. “Pidge, were going to get you back safe. Let's go.”

She could distinctively make out the battle going on behind Lance. But she was lying down and way too tired to join it. Maybe she could go to sleep here and it would all be a bad dream by the time she woke up. 

“It's Lubos!” Ryner yelled, cowering in a corner as Hunk threatened her with his bayard. “He's forcing me to get quintessence. I'm so sorry, my friends. I didn't mean for this to happen. I only have a couple seconds. Leave, now, as I can control my body for only so long.”

“Is it just your hand?” Lance asked frantically, speaking so quickly that Pidge barley was able to make out his question. She sighed and didn't answer him, too tired to. “Hermosa, answer me. Is it only your hand or anything else?”

Him calling her (what was it?) hermosa suddenly brought Pidge back to what they had seen in their future. She nodded, still unable to speak, but hoping he understood that her hand is the only thing to worry about. 

When Lance picked her up bridal style and started running as Ryner was left screaming in her pole room was when Pidge realized what she had been doing with Ryner. She needed to get that forgetting chip. 

“Chip,” Pidge mumbled. “I need chip.” She didn't know when Keith had appeared, but she saw him give her a confused look. Oh well. It doesn't matter. She put her injured hand on his shoulder, keeping herself closer to him. 

“Keith, take Pidge!” Shiro instructed as everyone around her had started running. “Lance, hold her any tighter and she'll pass out. Give her to Keith and he'll pilot Green.”

“How do you know?” Lance asked, somehow his grip on her becoming more compacted. 

“Black told me that Green told him that she'd be willing to let Keith pilot her, as long as she gets Pidge back,” Shiro sounded as though this should be commonly known. “Now, let her go.”

Why wasn't Lance giving her to Keith? Didn't he want her to be okay? Pidge could barely keep her eyes open but she could see as Hunk whispered something in his ear and he sighed in defeat. 

She can feel herself get transferred into a new pair of arms. She looked up and saw Keith. Where did Lance go? She readjusted herself so that her left hand was able to properly stay still without it hurting. 

The last thing that Pidge saw before passing out was the wide eyes of Lance. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really dunno where this is going ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	3. well you're my green eyed girl

Pidge almost collapsed when she came out of the healing pod.

Her legs buckled under her and she tripped over her untied shoes. She felt somebody catch her. She looked up and came face to face with none other than Lance, who she was still a bit pissed at despite what happened.

“Thanks,” she quickly detangled herself from his arms. They reminded her of his strong arms in the future. She stood up right and noticed that nobody else was around. She looked at him quizzically. “Where's everyone else?”

“Dinner,” Lance answered, pointing in the direction of the kitchen. “I told them to save me a plate. I've been here for the past hours since we came back from Olkarion. I needed to be here in case you woke up.”

“I'm awake,” Pidge chuckled, trying to ease the tension. It seemed really awkward right now, which is weird considering that this is her best friend. They argue, it's what friends do. Why did this one make them so tense around each other now? Had to be something in the air.

“We need to talk,” he put a hand on the small of her back. “After you eat and all, of course. But yeah, we need to talk.”

Pidge wanted to retaliate against that. They didn't have to talk because she didn't want to talk. But she knew they were only going to get worse if they stayed silent. “I know. My room after dinner?”

Maybe mentioning rooms and most likely being alone in them isn't such a good idea with what they know is to come in their future, considering how red Lance got. Usually his ears are the only thing to color, but this blush had made its way to his neck as he nodded.

Well, technically, Pidge was the only one of the two to know about what they saw not being an alternate reality, unless Keith said something she didn't know. He has a right to know, too. It's also his future. But there's no way that he likes her back and she doesn't want to see the heartbreak on his face when he finds out that he didn't end up with Allura.

Lance led her to the kitchen, holding the door open for her, despite the fact that she reached for the handle. Pidge was a little shocked to see a small scar no bigger than a staple on her left hand, but ignored it. It's healed anyways.

When she walked in, everyone around the table stopped their conversation. Everyone, Coran especially, looked a little flustered. They had to take a double glance at her to make sure she was really standing there in the door frame.

“Pidge!” Hunk was the first to yell. He stood up and hugged her, and she appreciated the action after being lonely in that pod. Keith was the next to stand, but because he's not much of a toucher, he simply pulled the empty chair out next to him.

“We're all glad that you're back,” Shiro smiled at her. “But we have to discuss the big question at hand; what happened?”

Pidge made eye contact with everyone at the table, save for Lance. “I should've suspected something was wrong when Ryner tried to isolate me and Lance. She told me about almost all her customs, and never mentioned one about getting arguing people alone.”

“We were arguing?” Lance asked from across the table, an eyebrow quirked at her.

“You know what I mean,” she rolled her eyes and continued, “The only reason we got out was because of that explosion. When she offered to show me her new stuff, she called me Katie and that's when I noticed that something was up. She was able to overpower me somehow and cuffed me into this quintessence draining device. She said less bones would make the process go by faster, so the first and only thing she broken was my finger.”

“What'd she need quintessence for?” Allura wondered.

“She needed something to experiment on for her new inventions,” Pidge looked down at the plate of food goo that Hunk had set down in front of her. “What disturbed me so bad was all of the discarded cuffs she might've already used.”

They sat in silence as Pidge poked at her food, eating it in half spoonfuls. Even after coming out of the healing pod, she had no appetite. The little scar on her finger took away all need and feeling to eat.

“I think that Lubos was possessing her,” Keith pointed out the obvious, a determined look on his face nonetheless. While she can't remember much besides the pain, the possession was definitely something she could recall. “She mentioned him while we were leaving.”

“Nice thinking, Keith,” Allura praised, offering a small smile.

Pidge nudged Keith with her leg under the table, smirking behind her glass of water. Every exchange between him and Allura now went recorded in her mind for future teasing. She noticed his little blush and he mouthed, “Later.”

It didn't help that somehow Lance had noticed some kind of exchange, because now he was looking at her with an intense stare that she couldn't tell if it was sadness or anger. It looked like both. Why though?

“How are you feeling now, Pidge?” Hunk asked, eyeing her a bit warily. “I mean, getting the quintessence sucked out of you by handcuffs can't have you feeling too pleasant.”

Boy, was he right. She felt like crap. The kind of crap that doesn't wanna sleep or eat. All she wants to do is… be there. Like, be alive because she was close to that not happening but she didn't feel like doing anything.

“Do you want the truth or the watered down version?” Pidge asked, looking at them nervously.

“Truth,” Lance said. The first time he had spoken at the table since his small doubt at her saying they argued. He knows damn well if they weren't fighting before going into the therapy thing then they, at the very least, weren't getting along.

Maybe the therapy house or whatever was a good thing because it finally got her and Lance to at least set up a talk for later.

“Well,” she began. “I don't wanna eat or sleep. Like whatsoever. And my finger is in a bit of pain and getting the quintessence forced out of your body really leaves you pretty sore. But yeah, I would say I'm doing pretty good.”

Allura was the first to break the silence when she turned to Keith. “So about that store on earth you were talking about?”

*

_So this is how it starts_

_Two lovers in the dark_

Pidge bopped her head to the music playing in her headphones as she lied on her bed. It's the music that Matt would play all the time when they were home. She's could really use for the nostalgic music sessions.

Being so far from home has made her really miss it. It was painful how alike Beezer and Bae Bae are. How they both know when she's upset and go into her room and don't leave until it's morning or she's going somewhere.

It's these little things that remind her of her life back on earth. Even though she didn't get along with other kids her age, she still missed life at the Garrison compared to now.

How did she get along better with kids older than her? Allura and Coran are like, a billion years older than her. Everyone else has a solid two years (or more) on her. Hell, her best friends is seventeen and Keith is legally an adult.

Whatever it was, it was weird. It's strange to have friends in the first place. It's not very often that she had those. The last person who had been her friend is Matt, and now she has basically a whole other family.

Daydreaming about her friendships is probably why Pidge didn't hear when someone had knocked on her door. She only heard it once the pounding had become more aggressive. It sounded like someone was trying to smash her door into pieces.

“Come in,” she called out. When the somehow intact door opened, it revealed to have been Lance standing on the other side. He had a hand in his pocket.

Should guys look so good with messy hair and a hand in the pocket? It looks so attractive that she let herself think about their future for a second before stopping herself, knowing that she shouldn't ponder it too much.

“You said to come to your room after dinner,” Lance shoved the other hand into his pocket, shrugging, his hair moving along with his actions. Oh, how badly she wanted to run her fingers through those locks.

“Yeah,” Pidge took her headphones out of her ears. “No, yeah, totally.”

Lance walked in, closing the door behind him. Being in a room alone together had never been a problem before. They had done it a thousand times before. But the tension in the air had Pidge wishing he had left the door open.

“First of all, I wanted to say sorry,” Lance sighed, walking closer to her to sit on the edge of her bed. “You were only being a good friend when you offered to take Keith with you. I shouldn't have gotten so offended and I take full blame for Ryner sensing that we were off before going to Olkarion. So, sorry for that.”

Pidge accepted his apology with a nod. She didn't know if she had anything to be sorry for. He was the one who had started it. He was the one who got all pouty with her. She only defended herself against what he was saying.

“It's just really weird,” Lance laughed humorlessly. “I find out that in other universes, I have a heated make out session with my best friend. It's weird information to have.”

“Actually…” She had to come clean. It's his future as much as it is hers. He had a right to know about it. “It wasn't exactly an alternate reality.”

Lance sat up straighter at these words, eyeing her nervously. “What do you mean?”

She fidgeted with her fingers as she thought about how to break the news. “Remember how we didn't know about some of the stuff we saw being the other universe and whatnot? Keith told me that Hunk is the only one who didn't see his future.”

“What?” Lance asked, but his smirk told her that he understood what she was trying to say. “You can't just give me hints. Be blunt. What is it that you're saying?”

“What we saw is our future!” Pidge yelled, her voice cracking. All of her emotions came out in those words. “We saw our future and that means we really do make out or whatever and that's what I have to apologize for.”

It isn't his job to make her feel okay or to try to reassure her that it's fine. His kind smile told her that he was trying to come up with encouraging words as they speak. But he didn't have to do to do that.

The smile was wiped off of Lance's face when he saw how upset she had actually gotten. Great, now she had ruined what could've been a hilarious inside joke between them as they pretended that an eventual kiss wouldn't happen.

But Pidge kept talking as he opened his mouth to talk. “And I know that you're probably mad at me now because you wanted to end up with Allura instead. Maybe we don't even get together but we still kiss and that means that at some point Allura is out of the picture and I have to say I'm sorry for ruining that.”

Good job, girl. Might as well reveal the fact that she's in love with him because of everything that she had said right now. He was probably so mad at her right now… She's the reason he doesn't kiss Allura.

Instead, he lightly chuckled. She had turned away from him at some point during her rant, but he tapped her shoulder. She poked her head to see him. “What makes you think that I would rather be with Allura?”

“Because I'm not your type,” she said matter of factly. “You like girls who don't wear boy clothes, wearing Harry Potter glasses, and are actually pretty. I'm not that-”

“Who says that?” Lance asked, suddenly looking a bit angry.

“Literally every girl you've ever flirted with since I met you,” Pidge made a quick grab for her sweatshirt that was on her chair. “And that's why I know there's either some mistake, or what we did in the future is an accident.”

He tried to say something. Lance made a grab for her wrist, and he barely grazed her pulse point. But she was too quick, and Pidge had successfully bolted from her room.

*

Once she noticed she was intruding on a private moment, Pidge stayed to watch.

“Why do you wanna learn how to use my blade again?” Keith asked.

“Because,” Allura scooted closer into Keith as he had his arms wrapped around her, attempting to place her hands in the correct position. “Why wouldn't I? You always look really cool when doing it and I wanna look cool too.”

Keith blushed at her words. “You think I'm cool?”

But Allura ignored his question and regripped her hands in the wrong place. Keith grabbed her wrist again to put them back where they were supposed to go. Because Pidge knew better, she could assume that the princess is getting it purposely wrong.

Allura is usually such a badass. She's acting a little weird now to pretend that she doesn't know what she's doing. Great, is she possessed by Lubos now?

“Now, with a blade, you have to get in closer to your enemy,” Keith explained. Allura already knew all of this, but she still nodded. “It doesn't require as much physical strength as most other weapons do.”

“Blades are more commonly used by people with lots of intelligence,” Allura smiled at her knowledge. “That must be why you use one then.”

Oh god… Was Allura _flirting?_ If she was, then how long had she been doing it for that all Keith did at her advances was blush? Not even a small smile or comeback. Who the hell taught her how to flirt?

If Pidge is really being honest with herself, the princess had probably picked it up with all the flirts and pick up lines that Lance uses. It's not that difficult to learn how to flirt. The hard part is actually doing it with that confidence that good flirters have.

“I wonder why you don't have a balde, princess,” Keith let go of her, suddenly red in the face. “I would assume that someone as smart as you could totally pull it off.”

 _Oh god he's flirting back._ Pidge had to resist the urge to throw up all over the floor as she watched the scene from her place behind the barley cracked open door, therefore exposing that she was watching.

But Keith had already seen her. He made a motion to her to come in the training facility where Allura was talking. He obviously wasn't paying attention as he attempted to get her to understand his motion while not letting Allura notice.

“What the fuck is up hoes?” Pidge yelled as she came into the room. Keith visibly facepalmed while Allura turned red. Oh, that's right. She's not used to the curse words from earth. A normal fifteen year old uses that language anyways.

“Sup,” Keith greeted, looking up from his hand.

“I should go,” Allura quickly thanked Keith before speed walking out of the room.

“Sorry,” Pidge mumbled. She didn't know if Allura had heard it, but she had to resist the urge to crack up. The princess had reminded her of how Iverson would react when he heard a curse word at the Garrison. “I've got a question for you.”

“Shoot,” Keith had picked up a random sword from the floor and threw it to Pidge, her catching it. “You don't mind sparring while talking, right?”

“Not at all,” Pidge said as she made a motion for him to pause. She had put on leggings and a sports bra to be comfortable after getting out of the pod, so she discarded her shirt and hoodie to comfortably spar. He took his own shirt off. She picked the sword up again. “So, you and Allura have been flirting lately, huh?”

Keith blushed before going in for a move with his blade. “We flirt, and then I think about how that's going to be my wife, and I freeze. That's why I called you in here.”

“You mean you saw me earlier?” Pidge asked, standing on one leg as she lost her balance when Keith pushed her back.

“I saw you the second you walked over here,” he accidentally hit the flat of his blade against her arm as she ducked. He winced for her before going back to his regular pace. “But what'd you need?”

“I told Lance that our heated kissing is the future,” Pidge distracted herself when she said this, her footing being lost and she fell without anyone pushing her. “And he laughed.”

“He _laughed?”_ Keith sounded angry as he offered a hand to help her up.

“Not really a laugh,” Pidge shrugged and got back into her stance. “It was more of a chuckle. I told him sorry for not being Allura and he got kinda defensive. Like he sounded mad at me for suggesting that I'm nothing like Allura. I don't really get why he got upset though.”

Keith stopped fighting all together, and Pidge disarmed him way too quickly. “Are you serious? You don't know why he got mad?”

When she shook her head, Keith rolled his eyes and shook his head. “C'mon, let's just go back to your room. You're way too distracted to spar properly right now. Plus, you're stupid.”

“Hey!” Pidge yelled, bending down to grab her shirt. “Why the hell am I stupid? I'm the smartest one out of all you hoes.”

Keith chuckled at her wording before tossing his shirt over his shoulder. “You're so smart when it comes to technology stuff. You're book smart. But when it comes to relationships, you're the stupidest person I know.”

Pidge raised her hands in defense. “I don't have much experience with crushes and dating. I used to think that love was a waste of my time until…”

“Until you found somebody to waste your time on?” Keith raised an eyebrow, looking smug under the lights of the castle as they walked back to her room.

It's a reason she didn't notice. After getting into the Garrison, she didn't see any reason to try her hand at dating. She saw as Lance and James and all the guys flirted with the pretty girls. She never understood why they felt the need to do that. She hadn't even realized that she stopped feeling that way when she began her feelings for Lance.

“I'm going to drop you off here,” Keith stood in front of the door to her room. “Now, you're going to have to talk to him or something, because something tells me that Lance isn't going to want you thinking he likes Allura.”

Pidge shrugged and opened her door, still looking at him. “Please, don't make me feel better.” The coldness of her room probably made shirtless Keith cold because his eyes grew as wide as saucers.

But when she turned around, Pidge saw Lance on the floor, playing Killbot Phantasm One.

She felt her own expression match Keith's, and she realized how wrong they must have looked with them both being shirtless after she ran away from Lance.

“I'm gonna go now,” Keith awkwardly walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Yeah, Lance has seen her without a shirt before. When they would train they would be shirtless, and he would stay in her room some nights and she wouldn't wear anything but a bra then. But it all seemed different now. Probably because now they know he's going to see her without _anything._

Lance sat on the floor, criss cross applesauce, sitting awkwardly. Pidge quickly put her hoodie back on. “Lance?” She questioned why he was here. He's been getting all pissy lately over when her and Keith lately, so this is probably a guaranteed argument.

On his part, at least.

“I'm not going to say anything,” Lance stood up and put his arms out. “I'm not going to get mad or anything. I just wanted to have a game night like normal. I waited for you to get back.”

“You waited?” Pidge asked, stepping closer to him.

“Yeah,” Lance put his arms down and shrugged like it was no big deal. “I wanted you to know that I'm not mad at you. I don't really like Allura or anything. I couldn't be mad at you for kissing me or whatever, just saying.”

It was weird when Lance kind of made a jerking move with his head. She ignored it and gave him a hug, thankful for him not getting mad. While she shouldn't have to worry about that, it's still a relief when he isn't upset.

When Lance returned the hug as she was about to pull back, Pidge's heart melted. She wishes he could have his arms around her every night as they fell asleep, only to wake up to his face before she starts her day.

Pidge wonders what would've happened if they had been shown a domestic future instead of one where they're making out like wild animals. Like maybe one where they're getting married or they're cuddling or _something_ that's not sexual.

Because with his arms touching her, all her mind could think of is the way his hands felt on her the night of a kiss that hasn't even happened. Yet, she could tell you almost every detail of how his hands felt on her.

“Wanna play?” Lance asked, sitting down and pulling her by the sleeve of her sweater.

Maybe an actual conversation and not a little chat about what happened earlier should be going on right now. And Lance is definitely acting like nothing happened. But her clouded judgement made her choose the path where she allows her friend to hold her aem.

“Duh,” Pidge spoke as if it was obvious that she wanted to play games. “Why else wouldn't I want to play Killbot Phantasm One?”

Lance grinned and passed her the player one controller. He's actually letting her be player one! He argues that since he's older he isn't allowed to be player two. His hand settled on her knee when he had given her the controller.

The blush was probably very visible. Her mind could only think about his hands on her thighs and knees as he hauled her onto her desk. She quickly glanced to it, making sure that it looked different from the future.

“What happened?” He wagged his eyebrows at her. His hand seemed to press itself _more_ into her thigh.

“Oh god,” Pidge mumbled. It was really hot in here, right? She's not sweating that much.

“You good?” Lance asked, scooting closer to her. “Are you cold or something?” He put his other arm around her shoulders, keeping his hand on her knee.

A sharp intake of her breath and his chuckle that she would have missed had she not been paying attention to every little thing that was happening right now.

“What's the matter?” He looked at her innocently enough, but when his hand went from her shoulder to hold her waist, she knew that he had no intentions to be innocent. “Is this okay?”

Pidge nodded, unable to speak for scared of confessing everything for him right now. She leaned into his chest, allowing her head to rest on him.

_Snap out of it._

Who was the one that was mad at her for no reason? Lance. Who was the one who wanted to act like nothing happened? Lance. Who was the one that made a big deal about her simply helping out a friend? Lance. Stupid Lance…

But Pidge wanted to stay like this. She knew they shouldn't, but she loved staying here cuddled next to Lance. They should be talking about earlier, not hugging. They should even talk about what happened on Olkarion, since no one pressed her much after. But she loved the feeling of him in a way that didn't have anything to do with their future.

Neither of them made a move to start the game. She's player one, so she's the one who should be pressing the button for the two player game. But she felt as if she was numb, feeling him pressed against her.

They could've stayed like this for a while. He didn't tell her to start the game either, and at one point her eyes were dropping and she almost fell asleep. He just gave her that much comfort.

But it wasn't until a clear of a throat coming from the door that made Lance fly at least five feet away from her. They both looked up at the door to see Shiro standing there, looking red.

“Ahem,” Shiro walked into the room. “The princess was a little scandalized by the use of Pidge's language, and I came to see if you broke the ‘two fucks a day' rule but I think some other rules are being violated here.”

It's insane how quickly the mood in the room changed. It went from a sweet cuddle to having their actual _dad_ catch them. Oh god how long had Shiro been there?

“I'm going back to my room,” Lance stood up from the floor. “I'll see you guys tomorrow.”

He was walking kind of… funny. He had his legs close together and hunched over a bit, looking like a penguin. His hands were in fist in front of him. Why did he look like an animal from Antarctica?

Shiro brought her back to earth (space?) when he closed the door again. “Keith told me you like Lance. I mean, we already knew but still. I came to ask about him but when I walked in his hands were going from your shoulder to your waist and I don't even know. Also, are you feeling better from earlier?”

Pidge groaned, feeling the embarrassment. What did Shiro _think_ was going to happen? “I can tell you that nothing was going on. Besides, it's only a one sided crush so don't worry too much about us. And yes, I'm doing much better.

“One sided?” Shiro leaned against the door, arms crossed. He had a shit eating smile that she didn't understand.  

“It's not like he likes me back,” she rolled her eyes at having to state the obvious. “He says he doesn't like Allura anymore but I think he's just pitying me because I kinda blew up _because_ of Allura. Dunno. I can't deal with crushes.”

“Why's that?”

Pidge wanted to take the attention off of herself. “How did you flirt with Adam anyways?”

Shiro blushed and suddenly reached for the doorknob. “That's not appropriate information for your fifteen year old ears.”

“Yet you're completely okay with me liking somebody two years older than me?” She laughed and how red their leader had turned.

“As long as you don't do what I did,” Shiro opened the door. “Then I'm completely okay with anything.” He left, but she could swear that he was laughing.

Well, whatever probably perverted thing that Shiro did with Adam had to have worked because they're getting married as soon as the Paladins reach earth again. But that's also because Adam actually _liked_ Shiro.

It's stupid to use the term ‘crushes' and ‘liking' when it comes to adults. It sounds way weirder and almost as if playing off any feelings. Why is the love vocabulary sounding so much like a high school couple on Snapchat?

Having a crush who actually reciprocated her feelings would probably make everything a thousand times easier. Keith knows he's going to marry Allura while she's stuck with the information of a make out session.

As soon as they get to earth, Pidge is going to Adam for help to get space boys to like you back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is like two hundred words shorter than what I usually write but I dunno I just got back from a four hour practice and I wrote ahhhh
> 
> PS please listen to woke the f*ck up by jon bellion it's such a good song and it's great for the story


	4. oh my baby im trying

“Lance!” Shiro yelled in anger. “Stop!”

Pidge felt awkward to say the least. All she could do from her position here was watch as Lance flipped out and Shiro had to somehow calm the boy down. It's what happens when she gets sent on a mission with Keith, apparently. She hadn't been paying attention to what had sparked the argument, but it seemed to have escalated.

“What's his problem?” Pidge asked offhandedly to Keith. He was kneeling beside her, shrugging and sighing.

“I think I'm the problem,” Keith ran a hand through his hair and chuckled.

“Why?” Pidge questioned. Didn't Lance just say that he wasn't going to be mad about Keith anymore? Or was that only her misreading the situation and everything he said.

Damn, what a shame to think one thing only for it to be completely wrong.

Keith gave her a side eye. “Damn it!”

“What?”

“Ah,” Keith chuckled. “Ah, shit.”

“What, did you shit in his cereal or something?”

“No no no no no no no no no,” Keith waved his arms around trying to make his point clearer.

“I got it after the first no, thanks,” Pidge moved a strand of hair from her face as she cut off the video feed from the castle, not seeing Lance try to argue with Shiro about whatever. “I'm starting to think that you and Lance really do have something going on.”

“Damn it,” Keith mumbled. He had meant to keep it to himself, but to Pidge, the whispering was very obvious. “Don't you remember how neck and neck me and him were at the Garrison? We're Lance and Keith, always going at each other.”

“I know you're lying.”

“I'll fucking stab your parents.”

“Wait no.”

Pidge laughed at how easy it was to talk to Keith now. Yeah, they had always been friends. Even before this whole future thingy whatever started, they would always drift to each other when one of them needed something. This is how their friendship works.

She felt comfortable. To her, love is about finding your best friend. While she is very close to Keith, it's  _ nothing _ compared to the way her and Lance are. For god sake, apparently now they're gonna be way closer and intimate in the future. He's her best friend, and they found each other.

“Like I said,” Pidge drew back to their earlier moments in the conversation. “Why the hell would Lance have a problem with you? Does he know about Allura?”

Keith groaned. “I thought he already told you that he doesn't like Allura.”

“He did,” she shrugged, fingers drumming against her lion. “Although, I believe that he was trying to make me feel better. I didn't tell him how I felt, but I did mention that I felt guilty for taking away his future with Allura.”

“If anything,” Keith chuckled. “I think that  _ I'm  _ the one who took anything away with whatever you think him and Allura have. Which, by the way, is nothing.”

Pidge shook her head. “That's what I don't really understand. You say he doesn't like Allura, and he said that too, but why always flip out whenever she's in danger?”

Keith started tapping his fingers against her thigh, a sign he was nervous. What was he nervous about? “Did anyone tell you about what he did when he got your message when you and Ryner left? Or when we found you?”

“No,” she shook her head, unaware of the information that was about to be presented to her.

“He went absolutely ballistic,” Keith waved his arms around for emphasis. “The second you said that something was wrong, he literally flung himself out of his chair. The chair itself went flying, but not as fast as he did.”

Pidge stayed silent for a moment to think about what this meant. Lance went off because she was in danger? So what? Being in danger is the only time he cares? “Okay, so he stood up really fast. Is that it?”

“Look,” Keith put a hand on her shoulder. “The breaking of a finger isn't that bad, but the whole quintessence thing made him flip. I can't tell you how close he was to sharpshooting Ryner then and there. That boy had already made plans to sleep by your pod as you healed because he wanted to be there for you when you woke up, not at all caring that it could've taken weeks considering how bad the thing was. You should've seen him, all curled up next to you to wait. He didn't want me to come on this mission with you, and I think you know why.”

She waited for an answer, but didn't get one as Keith wanted her to answer. She does admit, hearing how much Lance had done to be there for her after being injured did make her heart flutter, but they're Paladins. It's their job to care for each other like this.

Keith sighed again, looking done with everything she's saying. “He thinks that he can't protect you. He told Hunk how if he couldn't see that you were in danger when Ryner had you, he wouldn't be able to now. And since I'm not with the Blade right now, Shiro sent me.  _ That's  _ what made Lance freak out at Shiro right now.”

They had finally reached their destination. They were supposed to hover over Olkarion enough to not be noticed but enough to see what was happening. Mainly to see if any quintessence sparks or something would fly up. Pidge parked (?) Green and looked out the window, not wanting to face Keith right now.

“Why would he freak out about you?” Pidge was exhausted at having to guess everything that Lance is thinking and why he's upset with her and Keith. “He never gets this way with Hunk or anyone else.”

“Did you notice,” he raised an eyebrow. “That when Allura said she saw some dude with white hair, Lance didn't show any emotion towards that? But whenever we hang out, mainly because I haven't been around, he goes ballistic and angry at you? Because we all did.”

“That didn't answer my question,” Pidge rolled her eyes. “Why does he get like this only around you? And why now, all of a sudden, is he being all protective?”

He banged his head lightly against Green. What's he getting all worked up for? “After seeing the future, even if he didn't know it's going to happen, it made him hopeful for some kind of relationship with you.”

“Why the hell would he want that?” She asked, genuinely confused. Lance wouldn't want any kind of relationship that isn't friendship. If it's not Allura, then it's some prettier girl. It isn't her. It can't be her because he'd say something, right?

“I'm getting a headache.” Maybe Keith doesn't know what a headache is or something because he definitely didn't have one just by the way he was acting. “I'll let Shiro know nothing happened.”

“We didn't even stay for five minutes,” Pidge protested. “We spent way too long just flying over here.”

“The Blade is already on there way.” With that reassurance, Pidge turned Green around to start flying back to the castle. That's when Keith turned around at her, smiled, and said, “Have you ever considered joining the Blade? You'd be perfect.”

*

It wasn't until Lance told him that he was angry with him that Shiro understood just how far out Lance's feelings went.

At first, it seemed like a crush. Lance likes Pidge? Okay. They're always spending time together. It's not like they'll be any different from how they are now. It'll be good for the both of the.

Then, it turned into a full fledged actually being into her. Lance would begin to make more time to hang out with her. He would always sit next to her and tease her with flirtatious stuff.

It wasn't until today that Shiro realized that Lance was truly in love.

“Hey,” Lance greeted as he walked into the lions' hanger where Keith and Pidge had just left. “I was actually looking for Keith, but I couldn't find him. I assumed he was with you.”

“He actually just left,” Shiro pointed to the empty space where Green had been. “I sent him and Pidge on the lookout mission. I figured that since you didn't want to go that I would use the next best thing.”

It had been meant as a harmless tease. Shiro had even turned to smile at Lance, but that quickly died when he saw how upset the other boy looked.

“Keith and Pidge went?” Lance looked like a sad puppy. He could've sworn that even his ears had dropped. “When did I say that I didn't want to go on a mission with her?”

“I just assumed,” Shiro put a hand on Lance's shoulder to calm him down. “Hunk had told me that you were scared you couldn't protect Pidge and I thought you wouldn't wanna go. I used Keith because he's the other person I know would protect her. Not any better than you.”

Everyone knew about Lance's self esteem issues and how he felt like he didn't have a place on the team. That's why Shiro felt the need to reassure Lance that his place as Pidge's unofficial ‘protector' hadn't been touched.

“Why would you do that?” Lance turned on him, suddenly angry. “Have you seen the way that they are lately? Didn't you notice that all of a sudden, Keith is here after me and Pidge see each other in  _ that  _ way? I  _ try  _ to be obvious but she never notices because Keith is always there!”

“Oh, we  _ all  _ see the way you look at her,” Shiro rolled his eyes. “I think the only reason she can't see it is because of how mad at her you get whenever she gets around Keith or whoever.”

It had all been meant to let Lance know that he should back off of her, but he took offense to everything. “Well, I'm sorry for feeling threatened that the girl I love is going to get with another guy! I'm sorry for feeling like this, didn't know that insulting Keith would make you so upset!”

“Lance!” Shiro yelled in anger. “Stop!”

This isn't like Lance. He never gets angry or jealous to the point where he starts yelling and blaming other people. Especially when he's insulting another Paladin (former or not) and is yelling at his leader.

“I'm sorry,” Lance looked taken aback. He was on the brink of tears. Shiro could easily tell by the way the boy's eyes watered. “I'm sorry, I just don't know how to deal with this any other way. I don't want to think that it's my fault she isn't into me. It's easier if I blame Keith.”

Shiro chuckled. He thought back to his conversation with Pidge. “How exactly do you know she doesn't feel the same way?”

Lance looked down at the floor. “Look, I don't exactly think that. I know that there's a little something there because I'm not stupid. I didn't want to shy away from Pidge. But, I think that she's losing interest or something.”

“Why do you say that?” Shiro asked, excited to be hearing every word, sitting down next to him. The Paladins don't usually come to him about relationship problems. They usually talk to the mice about this kind of stuff. It's nice to be involved for a change.

“It's like knowing that we're gonna be in an intimate moment like that later in life scared her off,” Lance plopped down on the floor before continuing, “I wish I could know what she's thinking because all she's been sending is mixed signals. I don't like being led on.”

Okay, that's a problem.

Pidge is one hundred percent on board with the idea that Lance doesn't like her. She thinks that he's only doing charity work or something for her and that he wouldn't like someone like her. She may not know that everything she says is clinging onto Lance like glue.

But at the same time, it's not like Lance is completely innocent. He got mad at her the other day and today because she simply was hanging out with a friend. Instead of talking to her like a civilized human being, he blew up and got jealous.

Shiro had to choose his words very carefully. Being with a very emotional teenage boy can be difficult. He learnt that from Keith. “Why don't you confess your feelings?”

That wasn't the wrong thing to say, but it also wasn't very funny. Shiro looked confused as Lance giggled. “I'm sorry, did you say that I should confess my feelings?”

“Well,” Shiro felt the blood rush to his face. He was embarrassed because he didn't know what he said that was amusing. “That's kind of how it works. You can't move forward without letting the other know how you feel.”

“How did you confess to Adam?”

“Let's change the subject back to you, seventeen may be too young to hear  _ that  _ one,” Shiro ignored how hot it suddenly felt in the room.  

Lance made a protesting sound before accepting he wouldn't hear the tale yet. Maybe in a year or two. “Don't you think I've tried? I've left hints that she's never picked up on. I don't know if I'm not trying hard enough, she doesn't reciprocate, or she's sending mixed signals.”

Shiro thought for a second. Pidge definitely does return the feelings, but it isn't his position to announce this. She'll say when she's ready. “She's only really obtuse. I don't think it's you.”

“So she doesn't notice me?” Lance asked, suddenly defensive. He stood up quickly, almost tripping. “Do I have to try better? Am I not good enough?”

Shiro sighed. The look on Lance's face said just about everything. “You really love her, don't you?”

He was expecting an embarrassed murmur of no, but he forgot that this is Lance that he's talking to. He isn't afraid to let the world know of his feelings, partially so they know that Pidge isn't anybody else's but his. “I do, Shiro. I really do. But I don't understand why she acts like she does one day only to run off another.”

Lance's face completely transformed into a look of hurt and shock.

“What?” Shiro asked, intrigued by this change of demeanor.

“She doesn't fucking trust me,” Lance started walking away. “If she did, she would have told me she felt uncomfortable or something instead of running off with Keith! I can't believe her!”

“Lance!” Shiro tried yelling after him, but once he had broken into a run, there's no way that the Red Paladin would be convinced to not run after the girl he loves.

*

Pidge walked calmly into the kitchen to find something to calm Keith's headache that he probably didn't have, and his protesting that he's fine is supporting her theory.

Like she said, she did it  _ calmly.  _ She wasn't even in her armour, but instead a sweatshirt and leggings. The ride back to the castle wasn't eventful, and was filled with her and Keith's playful banter about the stupid kids at their school,  _ Lance included. _

All in all, she was having a good time. She was planning on snatching up whatever medicine she could get for headaches and continue back to her room to continue reading a book that Matt had recommend back on Earth that she got her hands on; Ready Player One.

It was a very pleasant plan that was quickly ruined by  _ Lance  _ of all people. He walked into the kitchen with a look on his face and wild eyes that told her he had ran from wherever he had previously been.

“Lance?” Pidge raised an eyebrow at him, thinking if this was the same panicked look he had when she was captured. “Can I help you?”

“Yes you can,” Lance sat down on the kitchen island, crossing his arms. His eyebrows were furrowed in what looked like anger. Pidge continued to stare at him, waiting. “Why don't you trust me?”

Definitely not what she was expecting.

This is unlike Lance. This is unlike anything he's done before. He's always gone through everything with his head up because he'll always have his friends. Trust was something that was vital to a Paladin. For him to go as far as accusing her of not trusting him for what?

It made her angry and defensive.

“Why the everloving fuck would you think that?” Pidge took a step back from him. “What did I do that made you like this? How could you  _ ever  _ think that I don't trust you?”

Lance looked taken aback. He assumed he would have the upper hand, being the one who started the conversation and all. It was a stupid one, definitely. “I thought that because you send mixed signals my way, you didn't trust me enough to know I wouldn't hurt you.”

What the hell? What's he saying? When does she send mixed signals? Oh god. He doesn't like her and he's trying to figure out why she's acting different now. “That doesn't make sense whatsoever.”

Just a tiny fib so she can play this off and doesn't cry here in the middle of their kitchen when the realization hit her. He could've been as concerned as he wanted about her getting hurt, but it wouldn't change the fact that he doesn't return her feelings.

“You act so different around me lately,” Lance threw his hands up in the air. “If the thought of kissing me in the future is  _ so  _ bad then why don't you go and get in a relationship already so it doesn't happen? Don't give me false hope.”

Pidge had it up to goddamn  _ here.  _ He had absolutely no right to accuse her of not wanting him or whatever. He didn't know the facts and was making shit up in his head so he could put the blame on her. She thought back to her conversation with Keith about the Blade.

“What the  _ fuck?”  _ Pidge yelled. “You have no idea how I feel about the future. I was affected by it the exact same way you were, so don't be so sure I don't give a fuck. Unless you want to think that so it's easier to reject me, and in that case, go crazy.”

“Why the flying fuck would I do that?” Lance hopped off of the island to stand in front of her.

She actually laughed a bit. It seemed so stupidly funny that he would act like he cares, especially after saying she doesn't trust him. “You wanna know something? I've been told recently that I'd be good for the Blade of Marmora and if you're always going to be yelling at me like this, I think I'll actually consider it!”

It had been meant to end the argument that had sparked out of nowhere, but Lance seemed to only get angrier. “Oh, of course. Go and join the thing that  _ Keith  _ wants you to join. Yeah, go right on ahead and abandon your best friend like that.”

“You're not my only friend, Lance,” Pidge scoffed. “Keith and Hunk and Shiro plus Allura are my friends just as much as us, but I thought you and I had a much closer bond. I guess not if you think that I don't trust you, even though you have nothing to back you up on that.”

“Wanna know something?” Lance was practically shouting at this point. “Do you want to know why I can never stand being away from you, despite how desperate that sounds?”

But before Pidge could hear the answer to a question she needed to hear, Keith and Shiro ran into the kitchen.

Keith was panting, and he put his hands on his knees to catch his breath. “Look, Shiro, I told you there was an angry latino in here.”

“Shit man,” Shiro put his hands up in defense. “It's not my fault the Raiders lost.”

Their comments had been meant to ease the obvious tension in the room, which must've worked. Either that or they were emotional laughing because Pidge and Lance were quickly cracking up.

“Pidgeon,” Shiro put an arm around her and led her out of the room, Keith following being them. “I think we need to have a serious talk. Now  _ you,”  _ he pointed to Lance. “I will definitely be getting back to you.”

“Yes?” Pidge stared at him in a confusing manner.

“I think you gotta realize some things,” Shiro started walking to her room. “I think you have to rule out the option that Lance would never like you because now you're kinda being ridiculous.”

“What do you mean?” Pidge wrestled herself out of Shiro's grip to stand by Keith. At least he would defend her.

“I mean,” Keith shrugged. “I don't think that you know it, but you're hurting him.”

“How?” Great, no neither were by her side. “I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't purposely hurt Lance.” Except he's apparently gonna bring her pain at some point when they kiss but who the hell knows.

“You  _ aren't  _ doing it on purpose,” Keith looked a little more sympathetic than he did a couple of seconds ago. “We know you wouldn't. But, we can't help but notice how stupid you can be when it comes to your feelings.”

“What the fuck do you mean?” Pidge got defensive. What's with everyone making accusations right now? He's the one who's gonna end up hurting her. Except they don't exactly know that.

“You're a little obtuse,” Shiro held his fingers so they were almost touching to get his point across. “You never really notice what's in front of you.”

That's crazy talk. She thought back to all of the times she solved complicated code or an entire virus because she barely glanced at it. She can see when stuff if laid out. “Well, I don't think I'm the dumb one here if you think you can rule out the many times I've saved everyone by simply typing letters into a keyboard.”

Shiro shook his head. “That's not what I mean. I'm talking about social stuff. You're the smartest person on this team. Everyone can admit that very easily. It's the fact that you don't notice stuff in a social setting.”

Okay that's… Absolutely fair. It's one hundred percent true. She's never been good with people and only ever got along with technology. This whole space thing is the only time she's ever got along good with human beings. It's weird.

“How am I hurting Lance?” Pidge questioned again. It just didn't make sense. She can't be the one hurting him when one day, he's gonna leave her and hurt her. That's what their future holds. Not some cute domestic setting. It's fucking leaving.

“We heard what you said before we interrupted you guys,” Keith sighed. “I would absolutely love for you for join the Blade. That's always gonna be an open offer. But to tell that to Lance while he's about ready to launch himself into space? That probably wasn't the best idea.”

“Sorry,” she half heartedly apologized. “I was just angry and he was gonna say something before you guys barged in.”

“That's  _ why  _ we stopped it,” Shiro ran his hand through his hair. “We know exactly what Lance was going to say, but you guys were too angry and he was saying it in the heat of the moment. That's not how a conversation like  _ that  _ should've gone by.”

“What was it?” Pidge was genuinely confused. This isn't answering her question about how the hell she's hurting him.

Keith shook his head. “If even we knew and you didn't, then you probably shouldn't be hearing it from us. It's not our place to tell, and you can't even figure it out.”

“Shoot,” Pidge mumbled. “It's not my job to guess everything that he's thinking. Sorry for not being perfect at emotions and boys. First time I've been tangled up with one, ya know?”

This sucks.

On one hand, it seems like everybody is expecting her to fix Lance up. Like whenever she does something wrong (which she doesn't even know what), they're all waiting for her to go to him and comfort him. As if that's  _ her  _ duty.

But on the other hand, they're also being incredibly patient. While Hunk takes care of Pep Talks With Lance™, Keith is taking his time and trying to explain. He may not tell her everything, but there has to be a reason for that. It has to be a valid reason too.

“So, what?” Pidge had meant it as a question and not a sarcastic comeback. But Keith and Shiro both looked like they had been slapped across the face. “I accept being left in the dark about everything? I let myself be dragged around as I wait for Lance to come around and stop being a pouty baby?”

Shiro rubbed his forehead, probably thinking about what he did to possibly be stuck in this situation. “Look, all I'm saying is that you have to let Lance do his thing. Don't push him away so much because you think he doesn't like you, though. That's only gonna hurt both of you.”

Pidge smiled as Keith ruffled her hair. While she definitely didn't agree with  _ everything  _ they said, she did realize something. She hadn't even noticed that's why she was trying to push herself away from Lance. Because she's scared for the rejection at the end of the road.

Even knowing that a kiss is somewhere along that road, she doesn't know if that kiss is stopped. The back of her mind kept telling her to stop, and who knows if they did. Maybe future Katie and Lance are just as stupid as present them.

“How do you guys know so much?” she asked bewildered. “Seriously, you're both guys. How did you ever become so smart about personal girl problems?”

Keith and Shiro shared a look that she pretended to ignore. It was an all too knowing look that told her that their was definitely stuff they knew that she didn't, but she was tired of fighting people right now. All she wanted to do was take a shower or something.

“That's what happens when you're with a boy you're waiting for back on Earth,” Shiro winked at her. He pushed the door to her room open. “I would say this is your destination.”

Pidge smiled gratefully at the two. Maybe one day she'd seriously take the Blade into consideration. Spending time with others might not be so bad. She stepped into her room before saying, “Thank you.”

Closing the door behind her, she summarized the whole talk.

Basically the guys had told her not to push Lance away because she's scared of rejection, and that stuff would happen on its own. If that's the case, then all Pidge had to do was buckle up and wait for the future.

*

“Lance, holy fuck,” Hunk invited himself into the Red Paladin's room, Keith and Shiro close behind him.

“I swear, whatever it was, I didn't do it,” Lance locked his phone, attention averted from the pictures he was looking at.

“Yes you did,” Keith plopped himself on the foot of the bed. The sudden movement made his phone light up again, showcasing the screensaver of him and Pidge sharing a soda as a joke to everyone in the room. “You know very damn well what you're doing.”

Lance grabbed his phone and slid it into the pocket, ignoring everyone. Keith almost grabbed it again because the picture was cute. “All I want is answers as to why my best friend is suddenly acting this strange around me when I was just here.”

“What happened in your alternative reality?” Shiro asked.

Now, that's gonna be funny. Lance needs to explain to his freaking dad that him and Pidge, who regularly spends the night in his room with shorts and a tank top, are going to heavily make out in her room one day. Oh, he is  _ so  _ in for a sex talk right now that Keith wants to laugh super hard.

It's funny to think about the first time that he was given a sex talk. Girls totally digged the ‘Bad Boy Who Got Kicked Out Of School' or something because he was able to lose his virginity like, two days after that. Didn't take much longer for Keith to figure out that he's bi.

“It wasn't an alternate reality,” Keith was really stifling his laughter right now. He caught Lance's eye. Oh god, is he  _ really  _ jealous right now? That he knows about their future shenanigans? “It's up to Lance to tell you what happened, but if he doesn't, then I will.”

“I'll tell them!” Lance turned red when he shouted too loud. “Ahem, I got it.” He cleared his throat to speak quieter. He mumbled something that was too quiet to hear.

“What was that?” Hunk put a hand to his ear, unable to hear. He had a smile, even though Pidge hadn't told him what happened. But Lance probably told the mice who told Allura who told Hunk who probably told freaking Matt.

Oh, Allura…

“I said we kiss!” Lance turned red again, gripping the bed sheet.

“I'll bite,” Keith rolled his eyes. This isn't  _ that  _ much of a big deal. Well, maybe when the person you're kissing is the person you've been in love with for forever. Okay, so maybe it was a big deal. “They make out. Like,  _ make out  _ make out.”

If he found out that he and Allura were gonna - heh, oh yeah - he probably had the same dumbfounded face that Lance has right now when he found out that him and Allura are getting married.

Heh, that's a whole other issue that Keith is dealing with right now. How  _ does  _ one process the fact that him and the girl that are flirting are gonna get married? That seems like an equation that he's not even gonna ask Pidge about. Not like she'll be much help in the love department.

“In the castle?” Shiro asked, wide eyed and red faced. When Keith nodded, he made a gagging noise. “Okay, that's absolutely gross. I lost everything I was gonna say. Just lay off the poor girl. Ew, I'm leaving."

“Let's pretend you and Adam don't exist,” Keith rolled his eyes, still traumatized at that one time he found them in the empty classroom. That vision is  _ never  _ leaving, despite his many attempts to have it permanently erased.

Hunk was patting the shoulder of a groaning Lance who was burying his face into his hands. “I get that you know there's romantic feelings involved between the two of you, but you really have to stop biting her head off.”

“Hunk,” Lance sighed and shook his head. “I just don't understand. Some days I'm so sure if I walked up to her and asked her out, she'd say yes a thousand times over. But others, she'd tell me to screw off because she's already secretly dating Keith."

“I can one hundred percent assure you that me and Pidge are nowhere near romantically involved.” Nothing like that because Keith ends up with Allura, then Pidge and Lance may end up fucking on her desk.

“She's just as confused as you are,” Hunk continued rubbing circles on Lance's shoulder. “The only difference is she's one hundred percent sure that you would never be into a girl like her.”

“That's the only girl I'm into,” Lance stood up from the bed and ruffled his hair. “She's the only girl I ever pay attention to. I stopped flirting with random Alien girls  _ for her.  _ We were in a fountain for hours  _ for her.  _ I am so ready to give her anything she wants but she doesn't notice.”

Neither of the boys really knew what to tell Lance. It was probably better for him right now to rant instead of hearing advice that was gonna do in one ear and out the other. Knowing the boy, he wasn't really listening to anything they were saying.

“She doesn't know that,” Hunk reminded. “You can say all you want all the stuff that you'd give up for her but she doesn't even know you're willing to make these kind of sacrifices for her. She needs to know first.”

“First,” Lance stood up and opened his door. “I need to know that she's willing. I know she is at times because I'm not an idiot, but I need to know that she's the same way. I'll tell her when the time is right. I'll figure out that time better if I was alone.”

Keith and Hunk understood this meant that Lance needed to sort some things out as they got off the bed and walked out the room like dogs with their tails in between their legs.

Wonder what else is gonna be in between whose legs in Pidge and Lance's future  _ aye what's up.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My friend bet I couldn't put that one game grumps audio into a chapter so I went "bet" and it's in the beginning 
> 
> Student athlete here who's dying with exhaustion after practice all week who has CIF in the morning this chapter sucks lmao
> 
> Idk, it was fun to write from other POVs. I'm not writing Lance tho; it's kinda fun to leave his characterization up in the air;)
> 
> Another song I've found that's amazing for this story: Brave Enough by Lindsey Sterling ft Christina Perry I swear I'll make a playlist eventually 
> 
> My family is mexican btw so the angry latino thing is something we saw on a comedy set once that we use all the time even tho we aren't Raiders fans but Mexicans ya know
> 
> Wish me luck tomorrow that my coach doesn't kill us lol bye


	5. busy bein' yours to fall for somebody new

Pidge only had one thought in her head, and that was to stay awake.

She saw the explosions around her. She was able to focus on the bright fire as she tried not to think about the searing pain in her side. The blood that spilled out also seemed to make her incredibly dizzy.

“Pidge!” She heard someone yell. That can't be right. She had been alone only seconds ago, the only company being Ezor and Zethrid. They're the ones who got her in this position in the first place. It's  _ their  _ faults.

It's not like she's losing a lot of blood or anything like that. Or at least that's how she has to think before she starts freaking out and having a possible seizure. That can't happen right now, and quite frankly she's too tired to deal with dying.

She collapsed to the floor, legs crumbling underneath her. She was so tired… Right here on the floor is a good place to go to bed. Yes, here. On the safety of the floor without seeing the Paladins again since she got taken.

“Pidge!” She heard again. “Katie!” She moved her head to the side, trying to see what was getting her attention. Her vision is getting blurry, but there's no way that anyone can ignore the flash of blue running towards her. “Pidge, are you awake?”

Lance crouched next to her, running a hand through his hair. “Oh my god..” He mumbled. She felt something wet on her face, and at this point she doesn't know if it's raining or there's just that much blood. “Katie… No..”

“Don't leave,” Pidge weakly grabbed onto his wrist as he held her head in his hands. “Please, don't leave me alone again.”

He shook his head. “Katie, I swear on literally everything that I will never leave you again. I don't know why I did in the first place but I'm not going. I'm not abandoning you again.”

But Pidge remembered everything he had done. All the words he had said to her earlier in the week as he held her tight, whispering stuff in her ear as his hips met with hers. To have that again makes her want to stay awake.

That also meant remembering the feeling she had when she went into his room and found him  _ gone.  _ He had left her and she doesn't know how to come back from that.

The universe and Voltron as a whole are riding on her. Pidge has to stay awake so she can save them. So no one who came to get her and got hurt in the process has wasted their time.

She's just… so tired.

“Lance?” Her cracking voice sounded pathetic to her. How could Pidge be here about to cry in pain when the Paladins probably risked so much to rescue her? “Lance, I'm tired.”

“I know, Katie,” Lance's eyes were blown wide, but she couldn't even open them that much. “Hey!” He yelled. “Hunk! Shiro! We need help over here! Keith! Someone, she's dying! Allura, help us!"

It was unclear to Pidge whose attention he was trying to get, but only one thing made sense in her jumbled brain. “Lance? I'm going to die?”

“No,” Lance had taken his wrist away from her hands and was now cradling her body. “Katie, you are not going to die. I am not letting you die. Just don't go to sleep. God, please don't fall asleep.”

“Are you kidding? You're talking to the girl who pulled two all nighters in a row,” she joked. But when she tried laughing at herself, she started coughing. She saw the red start to drip down her chin as she tasted something metallic in her mouth.

“Hermosa, stay awake.” She could vaguely hear Lance screaming, but everything he said was unintelligible to her. Everytime she blinked made her want to keep her eyes closed. It seemed so nice to just sleep right now.

A slap to her face joggled her for a moment. It reminded her of what she had just endured here. Of all the kicks and punches and shocks that have been added to her body. She could feel Lance pressing against a cut of her side, but that pain seemed numb right now.

“Didn't we say we were gonna have a game night when we went back to the castle?” He asked, his eyes soft. He didn't look panicked anymore, just… sad.

Pidge nodded. “I… we… Keith told me…”

“What?” Lance egged on. “What did Keith tell you? Tell me all about it.”

“I kinda…” She paused to take a shaky breath. Lance's grip on her tightened. “I kinda… you.”

“Me?” He shook her, the pain causing her to groan. “What happened to me? Are you talking about me? Tell me about me.”

“You're gorgeous,” Pidge mumbled. She wanted to sleep. She wanted to sleep so bad. But with Lance's begging and the thought of the entire universe resting on her shoulders, it's silly to fall asleep here. There's no bed!

“You think I'm gorgeous?” Lance chuckled. “Hermosa, I think you're fucking beautiful. Even though we've been complicated lately, I know I've never stopped loving you. You're not going to die and we're going to talk about this as soon as you're out of a healing pod.”

“Mm like that,” Pidge moved an arm to rub her eyes but became dizzy when her arm ended up being weak. The arm had a huge gash on the side. Probably got electrocuted. “Love you.”

Lance's face suddenly lit up. How could he look so happy right now? Isn't he tired too? “Katie, I can see Red coming to us right now. Just hold on for a second.”

But Pidge didn't hold on for that second. She could feel Lance's shaking fingers go to her pulse point to check her as her eyes began to slip shut. She couldn't stay awake. She was used to staying up late hours but this was a different kind of tired.

“Katie!” She could hear Lance yell. “Katie, don't fucking die! God fucking damn it I'm in love with you and I can't let go! Open your eyes! Please, just open them!”

She wasn't dead yet. But her eyes were closed and they were so heavy that she couldn't open them. She wasn't strong enough…

As Pidge began to lose consciousness permanently, she heard Red land next to them. 

*

Pidge sat up in her bed, panting like a dog and sweating. She had no idea what the hell that was. What the hell? Why had she just died in a dream or another future thingy or whatever?

Oh god she just died. Did she really die in the future? Is that really what she's fated to do? After everything, is life really going to screw her over and kill her in Lance's arms? Right after their argument? Really?

That doesn't compute at all. She was thinking about how he left, and in their future kiss, she thought about how he hurt her by leaving. Oh no… What if that really is the future? That's really how she's gonna die?

For one, it all seems impossible. No one has had a second future shown to them. The only reason they saw it in the first place is because Allura had been trying to tap into other realities. The princess would've said something about doing it again, considering what happened last time. So that had to have been a nightmare.

Okay, that's good. Pidge quickly wiped her eyes. She was crying. Why had she been crying? It wasn't going to happen. She isn't going to die in Lance's arms as she thinks about how life. It's not happening. She's not letting an inconvenience such as a giant cut she saw in her arm kill her.

She's not  _ that  _ unlucky. Surely any other person in his situation at the time would've cradled her the exact same way. Then again, if it really was a dream (which it was), then that has to be why he kept telling her he loves her .

It's strange. She's over here crying over a dream where she dies in another Paladin's arms. Dream or not, it's something trippy. It still made her feel awful and terrible. It does mean no sleep of tonight, definitely.

Imagine living fifteen years to find out via dream that you die from bleeding out. No one in the dream looked any different, and even though that wasn't the future, it would've been recent because still looks the same. Well, the one person she saw anyways.

A knock at her door startled her.

Pidge put her feet down to stand up, but the door swung open anyways. Lance was there in the doorway. Lance was standing in  _ her  _ doorway.  _ Lance. _

“God-” She cut herself off by jumping up and running to him, hugging him. He was surprised because he didn't respond until two seconds later. When he did, he hugged her even tighter than she did him.

Wait. They're in the middle of an argument. He had yelled at her and everyone had accused her of hurting him. He got mad when she suggested doing something else with her future that didn't involve Voltron. He's mad right now.

But the way Lance sighed as he pulled her in tighter by the hips told her that it's temporarily forgotten.

She pulled him by the neck to her bed, wanting to be closer. They landed on it. Thing is, even with knowing everything that's going to happen to them, laying on her bed when she's only wearing a sweatshirt and boxers, nothing about this felt dirty.

“That is not the future,” Lance reassured. “I am not letting anybody take you. You're not dying.”

They repositioned themselves so they were more comfortable. He was underneath her. She laid on his chest, head against his heart. She could feel his rapid heartbeat. They intertwined their fingers together.

“You think I'll let something like a little cut take  _ me  _ away?” Pidge joked, wanting to not think about how easily she had just  _ died.  _ Why was it so easy to kill her?

“I'm sorry for coming to your room right now,” Lance apologized. “I know we're not in the best place right now, but I needed to see you to make sure you were still here. I had to make sure you still had a beating heart.”

“Lance,” Pidge sat up. She had her back turned to him as she looked out the window. “I'm here, and I'm not letting something so easy kill me. I'm stubborn. Only old age is catching up to me.”

She felt arms wrap around her waist. She looked down slightly to see Lance is hugging her from behind. She leaned into his touch, fitting perfect in his arms. He rested his chin on her head as she intertwined their fingers again from where his hands were resting on her sides.

“I lost my head today,” Lance admitted. “I was so ready to protect you from anything and everything the second I woke up from that dream. I lost my head and I needed you. That's why I came. I needed you here right now.”

Obviously he would need her right now. He saw his best friend die. He buried his face in her shoulder as she said, “Don't worry. I'm not letting anything take me away from you guys.”

She wanted to say that nothing was taking her away from  _ him.  _ She may be angry at him, but that definitely doesn't mean she wants to leave him. Or any of the team. She had to make it clear that she isn't laying any feelings on the table.

“You don't understand,” Lance lightly squeezed her. “I don't know what I would do if you ever died, much less you die in my arms. What am I supposed to do? I freaked out because I thought I couldn't protect you and the second you were sent away on a mission without me I freaked out. I don't know what I'd do without a green Paladin in my life.”

“Find a new one?” Pidge laughed it off as a throwaway comment.

But the way Lance held her tighter told her he didn't take it that way. “There's no way we could ever replace you. I would never forgive Shiro if he found someone else to pilot Green. You're the only one I'd accept.”

“That's the emotions talking,” Pidge rolled he'd eyes at his sappiness even though he couldn't see her face. “You're only saying that because you saw me die and now you want to leave a lasting impression on me before I actually die.”

“You're not going to die.” Lance said sternly. He scared her even with how low his voice had been. She had only heard him that commanding once before. She's  _ going  _ to hear that voice again, she should say. “I won't let you so you can drop that idea.”

Great. Leave it to Lance to make everything in the room suddenly awkward. He tried to force her to believe that she isn't dying, but ended up doing it in a jerk manner. Only Lance.

“I'm sorry,” Lance started to lean back, her still in his arms. “I didn't mean to snap. I just get angry at the thought of yo- of dying. I don't like dying.”

“Me either.” They had resumed their previous position, with her on his chest as he held her close. Only this time she was lying in between his legs, her on her back. “It was very painful and exhausting from what I remember.”

Lance didn't laugh at her joke. Pidge didn't have to look at him to know that he didn't even crack a smile. He was either mad or sad (smad) at what she had said, no matter if she had meant it to ease some of the tension.

“Stay with me…” Lance whispered in her ear. It was so soft that she could've mistaken his voice for the wind. He had no aggression or negativity to his words like he had for these past few days. He meant it, no hardness lingering.

So that's how they stayed. No more words were exchanged as she lay on him. He rubbed soft circles into her slightly exposed hip, enjoying each other's company for the brief moments of peace they had for now.

Pidge doesn't know when or how the fell asleep. All she knows is by the time she woke up, Lance was already gone.  

*

“What's up?” Pidge heard as she walked into the kitchen that morning.

When she looked up, she saw the castle projecting a giant screen. When she looked upon it, she saw that Matt, Veronica, and James Griffin were plastered on it. She got excited at seeing an old acquaintance, brother, and friend.

“We were waiting for you,” Hunk filled her in. He had said it enough to where it's not an insult, but she knows that he had meant in informingly. To let her know that she had dragged on.

See, that's what seeing yourself die did to Pidge. It made her think that she's going to die at some point, so why bother? The least she can do for her team is try, no matter how much she wants to go back to bed and cuddle with Lance again.

Speaking of Lance…

He had definitely gotten vulnerable last night. He said a lot of things that Pidge repeated over and over again in her head. The way he held her as he said he couldn't deal with somebody else being the Paladin of the green lion. It made her glance at him once before completely avoiding eye contact.

She focused on her brother instead, confused as to why he's on Earth. Last they heard from him, he was still in space. Somehow, he's reunited with Veronica? Not only her, but James?

Wait… James and Veronica don't know that she's a girl. Oh god this is going to be a fun ride to see their faces when they use feminine pronouns for her.

Then again, Veronica never really knew her. Pidge had only seen her in passing about once or twice at the Garrison, so the only way that Veronica would know her by name is Lance.

Hmm.

“What's happening?” Pidge asked once as had concentrated again. Damn Lance and taking up all of her thoughts! Maybe that's what happens when you die and you can't stop thinking about it. And the fact that she died in his arms. How  _ mortifying. _

“We wanted to check in with you guys,” Matt informed. “I came back to Earth not too long ago. Two weeks ago, matter of fact. I had to see mom and dad. Anyways, we needed to see how you guys are dealing with the Galra. They aren't coming over here anytime soon, right?”

“Not if we can take care of it," Keith points to everyone. “Me and the princess have been working on a way to send you guys some of the tech we have up here so y'all can get started on improving the security from Earth.”

Interesting. So Keith and Allura have been spending one and one time together trying to improve stuff. They're doing great, in terms of relationships. Pidge may not know every detail about them, but she's positive that Keith is gonna come telling her about it sooner or later.

“First of all you're not even a Paladin,” Lance corrected. He was sitting down at a chair, but stood up and walked to where Pidge was leaning against the table. “Second, while that's great and all what you're doing, you're not a freaking Paladin.”

Oh yeah. They're in a fight right now. Pidge completely forgot with, ya know, dying and all that, she was supposed to be mad at him. She rolled her eyes at his immature he's being with Keith simply explaining a new project he's working on. It's bringing him closer to his wife, for crying out loud.

“Chill,” Pidge rolled her eyes. “At least he's doing something that's not pouting.”

That sounded a thousand times better in her head. She slapped a hand to her mouth when she saw how taken aback Lance looked. His half smile dropped and his eyes looked almost closed.

A part of her felt good that he had been put in his place. Even if he went to her after they had both dreamed about her dying for some reason, that's no reason for him to still get upset with Keith. That part of her served him right.

The actual decent human being part told her that was a bitch thing to say.

That's the thing about Lance. He activates her fight or flight response. Some of the stupid stuff he says makes her either want to run in his arms to feel like she's flying or shove him out the damn window.

Lance continued to stare at her as she focused her attention on Matt. “So what you're saying is I can't get away with insulting Keith when he's doing the worst possible thing to me.”

“And what's that?” Keith asked, amused. The corner of his lip was curling up. He was trying to hide his smile before Lance launched himself across the table and bitch slapped him.

“You know.” Lance sat back down, still next to Pidge, who was left in the dark again. She threw her hands up, angry that she hasn't gotten the information that everyone knows. It seems that even the people in the screen shared knowing looks. Why is she always left in the dark?

“So,” James intervened again. “Can I say how fucking terrifying it was for Matt to pop up out of nowhere? I for real though that Pidge had grown his hair or something like that. They stole each other's looks, ya know? Cause he got the long hair and he cut hers. You know? Pidge even got the glasses while Matt continued living his life without them. You know?”

No one knew if James was trying to ease the tension or waiting for someone to confirm that they had stolen each other's hairstyle and eyesight. Whatever it was, all it had done was make it awkward, but at least a bit of the tension was gone. There was one thing that had stuck out to Pidge, though.

“I'm not a him anymore,” Pidge let him know. “I wanted to let you know. I think it's important if you knew that I was faking being a boy because I wanted my brother and dad back. I'm actually a girl whose name is Katie. I'm also fifteen.”

James shrugged it off. “I know.”

The look of his face, a forced smile showing off his straight, white teeth, told them that James did not, in fact, know. How does Keith even talk to this guy? Then again, they probably talked before she even walked in.

“Me too,” Veronica smiled. Something was… suspicious about her smile. Maybe it was the way that her eyebrows waggled around. Well now it's obvious where her brother got it from. “Lance actually told me. Speaking of Lance, how do you feel abou-”

“HEY RONNIE!” Lance yelled. He was suddenly back on his feet, almost knocking Pidge down in the process. “REMEMBER THAT ONE TIME YOU TOLD ME HOW YOU LIKE GIRLS WITH LIGHT HAIR AND A SHAVED P-”

“Can I talk to Pidge?” Matt had wide eyes. Either he knew where this was going, judging by his blushing face, or he felt the need to inform everyone frantically of a conversation that needed to take place. “Like, alone?”

“Everyone clear out,” Allura demanded. She was the first to the door, attempting to hold it open for everyone else. Keith ran, though, and took it from her as he actually  _ pushed  _ her through the door. Well, damn. Either they have a strange sense of flirting, or they're rough.

Hmm.

Finally, all the Paladins were out of the room, even though Lance had turned at the last second to glance at her, leaving Pidge staring at a screen with her brother, her crush's sister, and James.

Why was James even here?

“That includes you two.” Matt shooed James and Veronica out of the room, both of them protesting. Apparently they wanted to hear whatever Matt was going to tell her. It can't be that interesting.

“Yes?” Pidge asked, bored. But she had to admit she got the better end of the deal. If Veronica had called everybody out of the room to talk to Lance alone, she would've gone crazy with curiosity.

“I see the way you’re eyeing that one boy,” Matt winked. “Why didn’t you tell me that you had a boyfriend? I won’t tell mom or dad, you know.”

Pidge choked on her own spit. “You’ve got it all wrong. I am not dating Lance, and I don’t think that I ever will be, no matter how much I want.”

Her and Matt had never really talked about crushes before. She was too shy to talk to anybody to get that close to them, and simply no one liked Matt because he was a nerd .

“You sure?” He raised an eyebrow. “Because from the like, five minutes of interaction I saw, he was looking at you las if you’re his whole world. Plus, he got super jealous of Keith. I assumed you guys were dating from that alone.”

Pidge rolled her eyes. “He’s been stupid jealous of Keith for some reason. Also, his name is Lance, which you already know after seeing him that one time.”

“I know,” he shrugged. “I like sounding like a dad. Back to what I was saying, ahem. So, any romantic interest in him?”

She nodded shyly. Their close enough for Matt to trust her judgement. She’d never get with anybody that made her feel unsafe. Even their future looks promising.

Oh yeah, that…

“This is gonna be really embarrassing to tell you,” Pidge rubbed the back of her neck. “But, everyone here caught a little glimpse of our future or another reality. Me and Lance were the only ones with a shared vision…” She trailed off, too embarrassed to tell her brother about the other boy who’s going to literally touch her everywhere.

“Lemme guess,” Matt looked both amused and bored. “You saw him kiss you or something like that.”

“Something like  _ that,”  _ Pidge hid her face in her hands as she waited for Matt to put two and two together and guess that the kiss wasn’t that innocent.

“Make out?” He squeaked, face red.

“Something like that.” She thought about the way that his rough hands gripped her thighs, running up and down her sides. The way his tongue felt in her mouth and how good it would feel for that wetness down her-

“What do you mean,” Matt was blushing furiously.  _ “Something like that?  _ What else is there besides a make out? Oh, there  _ better  _ not be anything else. I’m going to space right now to beat his ass.”

Pidge chuckled. “Well, I don’t know for certain if there was anything else. From what we saw, it was escalating  _ into  _ something else, not for sure. I kept thinking about how he had hurt me or whatever, but I don’t know.”

“He’s going to hurt you in the future?” Matt stood up. “I’m really going up there to beat his ass.”

“Matt, no.”

“Well someone has to do it.” But she knew her older brother was only joking. He sat back down with a tiny smile. “What about Keith? He seems like a pretty good option if things with Lance don’t work out.”

Pidge laughed so badly that her entire body shook.

Her? With Keith? Yeah, that’s something that’s definitely not happening. For one, he marries Allura. Two, she kisses Lance. And three, the whole brooding emo anime protagonist thing isn’t really her type. She’s sure her nerd girl thing isn’t right for him, either.

When she had finally calmed down and wiped the tears from her eyes, she said, “You actually think that I would get with Keith? No offense, but he’s like my best friend brother kind of thing. Or at least he is recently.”

“Does Lance know that?” Matt questioned. From his jokes and teasing he had been doing this whole time, it’s threw her off to see how serious he had become.

Pidge shrugged, sad that she couldn’t tell what her best friend thought of her and Keith’s friendship. Then again, they’re in an argument right now. “Lance has been getting really defensive of the way that I am with Keith after seeing our future.”

“The way that boy looks at you? The way he was so willing to call someone out for you?” Matt was pointing in the direction that Lance had left the room when he ordered everyone out. “I think the only reason you’re not dating is because of you.”

Like she always got whenever someone did this to her, Pidge got defensive. “What the hell does  _ that  _ mean?”

“I mean,” Matt softened again. “Go talk to him. I think you can sort a couple of things out if you guys just talked this damn thing out.”

Could forming Voltron be a problem because they were in a argument? He’s her best friend, anyways. They shouldn’t argue over something as stupid as the Blade.

“I think I’ll do that,” Pidge nodded at her brother, standing up and starting to walk towards the door. “I still can’t believe you kicked everyone out of the room to give me relationship advice, but I’ll take it.”

“Good.”

Pidge thought for a second before it came to her. “Have you been seeing anybody?”

“Mom and dad say hi I’ll see you when you get back to Earth I love you k bye.”

Pidge watched the screen turn black before she turned on her heel to go find Lance, wanting to sort out their argument for good.

*

“You said you wanted to talk?” Lance asked as he walked into her room.

After training that morning, she had cornered him before he had the chance to walk away from her. She asked him to go to her room whenever he had the time because she wanted to talk. He came not even a varga later.

“Yeah,” Pidge backed her rolling chair away from her desk where she had been mindlessly doodling. “I don’t like being in arguments, especially with you. I don’t wanna fight.”

“I think that dream earlier helped us blow off some of that steam,” Lance chuckled, leaning against her desk. “It just made me realize how stupid it would’ve been if we were fighting and you freaking died like that.”

“Hey,” Pidge almost wanted to laugh. “I like to think that I’ll be full of one liners when I die, and I wasn’t doing that. So that’s now how I die.”

“Yeah but,” Lance ran a hand through his hair. “You literally died in my arms. We’ve been seeing a lot of shit for the future. What if that was the future? What if I just watched you die seconds before you were rescued? Did we see what’s going to happen to you? What if-”

Pidge cut him off by putting a hand in his arm. He silenced himself immediately. “Please, don’t say I’m going to die. Because all you’re doing is scaring the both of us. Hunk saw an alternate reality. Don’t forget that’s an option too. Unless you want me to die because then-”

It had clearly been a joke, but Lance’s hand rested on top of hers and she shut up. “I don’t ever want you dying, hermosa. In the dream, my head kept racing with a thousand thoughts and I just about screamed the second you died and  _ then  _ Red came to rescue us. I couldn’t stand being too late. I can’t afford being too late now.”

“Lance,” she whispered. She can’t find the right words to explain how she’s feeling right now. “I don’t think I can even think about the Blade anymore and-”

That ruined whatever moment they had.

“You were still considering it?” Lance yelled. “Dude, you fucking  _ died.  _ We don’t know if you were on a recon mission or something for the Blade and you’re still going to be stupid and think about it?”

This is completely unfair. They were okay literally seconds ago. Now, he’s getting mad for her thinking about something that doesn’t have to do with Voltron.

“Are you stupid?” She asks. “Because you have to be to ruin whatever moment we were having right now.”

But Pidge didn't get yelled or screamed at. She would've been a thousand times more okay with that happening rather than the reaction that Lance had.

Because once she saw his tear streaked face as he ran out of her room, she knew their friendship was going to have a hard time recovering what this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried?? The ending was especially awful omg 
> 
> Playlist I finally made that's probably gonna be added to like every two days:  
> https://open.spotify.com/user/1q3f4d5e8oyyzytqmtt7e86j4/playlist/1GhMrqWemGDnKVNkmhXyna?si=-G1U39DRSRCQz-U5ChXiWA
> 
> This wasn't really that good?? But I tried?? So idk sorry you had to read this shit oops


	6. baby don't worry you are my only

“I'm already walking to your room,” Keith said as he picked up the phone. 

It's only been like, two doboshes tops since Lance left her room. Her immediate response was to call another teenage boy who could help her figure out how one works. Lance was probably on his way to Hunk's room, so she had to call Keith. 

“How'd you know?” Pidge asked. It seems that Keith had become pre equipped with how to fix this because she has no clue. 

“Lance ran past me crying,” Keith informed. “He was coming from your room so I kinda just assumed that you had something to do with it and/or you knew exactly what was happening, so I started walking over here already.”

“Well, can you hurry?” Pidge pleaded over the phone. She couldn't tell Matt about her dream because he would go crazy, Shiro would probably call Matt anyways, Allura would force her to take precautions every time they went somewhere, and Hunk wouldn't let her out of his sight. Keith was the only one who wouldn't go crazy with protectiveness. Plus, she needed someone to tell her what to do about Lance. 

A knock at the door told her that Keith had arrived. The door flung open without her even saying that he could come in. She was fine with that though. She didn't mind him entering her room without permission. 

“What happened?” Keith flung himself down on the bed. 

“I'm confused on that myself,” Pidge ran a hand through her wild hair. “Let me start from the beginning and what happened last night. Or morning? I don't know.”

“What happened?” Keith repeated. Her rambling wasn't doing either of them any good. 

“Right, sorry,” Pidge cleared her throat. “Basically, me and Lance had this dream last night.” Keith's eyes widened as he started blushing. Once she realized what he was thinking, she waved her arms around to let him know that he's thinking wrong. “No, nothing like that. It was basically…” She trailed off, scared of the reaction he was going to have. 

“If you don't tell me I'm going to assume you had a sex dream about each other,” Keith warned, wagging a finger. 

“It was one time!” Pidge protested. It seemed almost natural to joke about their future with the dream last night. “Anyways, I was being rescued. I don't know where you guys were at, but I was alone. with Lance.”

Keith raised an eyebrow. “You know, you're really starting to make me doubt that you guys didn't have a sex dream. Doesn't Lance have those like, twice a night anyways?”

Pidge hit his arm. “God, I hope not. He doesn’t.  _ Anyways,  _ basically something had happened to me and I was being rescued by him and-”

“And y’all screwed.”

“No!” Pidge made another swat at his arm. You have one vision about your future that’s inappropriate for a fifteen year old and you’re teased relentlessly. “I died.”

“Wait, what?” Keith had obviously not expected that. The playful smile wiped off of his face immediately. “You can’t say you dreamed about you dying when we’re dealing with seeing shit from the future. What do you mean, you died?”

“Exactly that,” Pidge wrapped her arms around herself. “Lance was rescuing me and I died in his arms just as Red landed to save us. It was… bad. Plus emotional, considering we’re still dealing with the aftermath of it.”

“Is that why Lance was crying?” Keith asked, sitting up from his lying down position. “Because you died?”

“No?” She sat down on the bed, leaning on the headrest. She put her feet in his lap, looking up at the ceiling. “Well, after the dream, he came in my room and we hugged for a while. A long while, actually. But come morning and he was gone, so I assumed he was fine. And because he was fine, I was gonna be fine too. To make sure of this, I called him into my room after training to talk and that's what happened now.”

“Okay well what'd you do?” Keith kept going back to that one subject. She knew that she was going to tell him eventually. There's really no avoiding it. 

“I told him I wasn't going to the Blade like, at all anymore,” Pidge ran a hand through her hair as she recalled what happened not even ten doboshes ago. “Being with him just makes me remember how much he means to me. Ahem, anyways, I said that and he ran out of here crying that I even considered it and here we are.”

“Okay, I disagree with what you said about not joining the Blade,” Keith lightly joked. “Maybe after the war. Still consider it. Back to what I was saying, I think Lance is just emotional. He watched you die and then you say you might go into more danger. He's mad at the possibility of you running away from him.”

“I'm not leaving though,” Pidge was confused. “In our future, I keep thinking about how he freaking left me! How am I the one running if he's the one who inevitably leaves. Why did we get another dream in the first place? No one else has gotten them.”

Keith thought for a second before replying, “What I'm thinking is that because you and Lance had the most reaction to your vision, there's some kind of weird quintessence thing in you guys left over to show another vision of the future or alternate reality. It's shared probably because of your emotions or something. I dunno, emotions are weird. I don't have them.”

Pidge laughed at his little way of making her laugh. “So you think our quintessence is what made us dream again?”

“In theory,” Keith suggested. “I mean, it makes sense when you think about it. Besides having it sucked out of you by Ryner, it somewhat makes some kind of weird suspicion. Your attraction to each oth- to him probably made something spark within you guys. This is all pure guesswork, by the way.”

“Were you toooooo fast?” Pidge recalled the times they played Kahoot back at the Garrison. She smiled as she remembered Earth, and one glance at Keith told her he was thinking the same, despite being an outcast. 

Maybe that's why they got along so well. She was the nerd that no one wanted to be friends with because she was weird. He was the delinquent who never managed to keep his anger in check. Both rejects, yet ended up with the person they wanted to somehow. 

One in marriage and the other…

“I wonder if me and Allura get married on Earth,” Keith smiled as he thought about what was to come. He leaned against the headrest. “I mean, I couldn't really tell where we were at the time of the ceremony. But imagine we get the privilege of marrying back on Earth?”

“Lucky duckies,” Pidge joined him against the headboard, leaning her head onto his shoulder. “All I know is that I'm going to be stuck freaking dying seconds before rescue and making out with a super hot guy.”

“I don't think you're going to die,” Keith thought. “I'm not just saying that because I'm in complete denial of you dying, by the way. It wouldn't make sense if you got  _ two  _ futures when you've already seen one. It's got to be an alternate reality. It wouldn't make sense if it wasn't.”

“I get you.” Really, she didn't. To her, it made even  _ more  _ sense if it was the future. Her brain or whatever is already trained for visions of the future, so having another universe suddenly plopped in doesn't make sense. But because she's also terrified of already knowing how she's going to die, she accepts his explanation. 

“Please,” Keith rolled his eyes. “With Lance on the ship, do you really think that there's any way in hell you're going to get hurt?”

“I mean, I've already had a near death experience where I was left alone with what was going to kill me but-” 

“And who's the one who went wild with rage when he realized you were missing?” Keith raised an eyebrow. “Easily, he's the one who found you when the rest of us couldn't. He's the one who almost shot Ryner dead on the spot when we found you. Everyone knows you would never let anybody overprotect you, but if it were up to him, you'd be bubble wrapped and left safe in his room or something like that.”

“I didn't even tell Matt,” Pidge admitted. If she wasn't going to tell him about her dying, then she should've at least told him about what happened with Ryner. If he got the living quintessence sucked out of him, she'd want to know. “I didn't tell him about dying for very obvious reasons. I didn't even explain what happened on Olkarion.”

“Did you tell him about your, ahem,  _ other  _ vision?” Keith asked, leaning into her. He poked her side, and probably was going to keep doing that until she answered. Oh, the embarrassment!

“On the bright side, he totally accepted Lance as a brother,” Pidge managed to squeak out. She felt him ruffle her hair to tease her, just like her brother would do if he were in person when she told him about the future kiss. 

“So you told your brother about your weird sex dream with Lance but not the fact that you almost and  _ have  _ died?” Keith seemed amused, but she could hear the hint of sincerity in his voice. 

“Basically?” Pidge shrugged. “I know he's going to kill me for keeping this from him in the end, but I don't want him here right now. I mean, yes, I would love for him to visit. But not now. Not while there's this threat of danger hanging over us. Plus, whatever weird arousal there is at times when Lance does something.”

“That would be sexual tension,” Keith explained, voice as if he were talking to a five year old. “It's what happens when both people want to fuck each other but are both too scared to say it, even though they can both sense that the other person is wanting it too.”

She blushed red. Did she really want that? Did she really want him in that way? Of course she wanted him, but does that mean she has to do  _ that  _ as well? Maybe. Maybe she did. Maybe she wants him to be in between her legs, tongue on her-

“I can say that I want it,” Pidge said. “I would say the only reason Lance wants it now is because of the vision itself. It made his hormones go crazy, and now he is unconsciously thinking about us like that, you know?”

Keith lightly hit her upside the head. “You are officially the worst person I know.”

Pidge raised her hands in defense. “Look, I've never been good with this relationship stuff. I've never even had a romantic experience with another boy. It's easy to read a hundred lines of code but it's almost impossible to tell what Lance is thinking and what he wants.”

“Well, what does he want?” Keith asked. “Do you know what he's looking for?”

She resisted the urge to undo her bed, crawl into the comforting blanket, and never come out again. “He's always talked about wanting to be this super cool pilot. When he comes back from missions, he wants a supermodel girlfriend waiting for him. That ain't me, dude.”

“So basically what you're telling me is that you're ruining your own chances with self doubt,” Keith gave her the side eye. “You should realize when he stopped talking about that future and how he never flirts anymore.”

What the hell does that mean? Lance is always the loverboy. He takes pride being the one who can swoon any girl he wants. He never uses his pick up lines or even flirt with her. If he wanted her, wouldn't he make an effort? 

“He may not like Allura,” Pidge wondered out loud. “But he definitely doesn't like girls like me.”

“He's upset right now,” Keith patted his shoulder. “I know for a fact that he's waiting in his room for you. If not in his room, then somewhere else. Wherever he is, he wants you there. He wants you to go talk to him.”

“Why is he so uptight about me dying?” Pidge asked as if Keith could provide the answer. “I mean, he said he wasn't going to let that happen so why would he be so sad about it? He himself said he could prevent it, so why react this way?”

“I think it's just the moment,” Keith inputted. “He got emotional.”

About people being emotional… “Do you want to be the greatest person of all time and not mention this dream to anybody else? I don't need everyone stepping on my toes everytime I go anywhere.”

Keith sighed and wrapped an arm around her to her surprise. He's usually not one for touching. He must've noticed her confused face because he chuckled. “I think Allura is doing me pretty good. I feel more comfortable now with physical touching. Like, way better now.”

Pidge felt genuinely happy for him but… doesn't the Blade need him too? What's going to happen when he's forced to go back? “That's amazing. You guys are going to be great for each other.” Rather not think about the harsh reality that's going to hit them later. 

“So, are you going to talk to him now or what?” Keith had a teasing voice that told her she wasn't going to leave his tight grip on her shoulders until she let up 

Pidge smiled at him before answering, “I think I will.”

But as her feet dragged her outside of her room where she left Keith sitting on her bed, her feet dragged her to the training room. Just a little something to distract her. But seeing Allura already there definitely threw her off. 

She tried to back out of the room but it didn't do any good as Allura spotted her, already waving her over. The princess looked like she was picking stuff up from the floor rather than actually fighting. Pidge walked over to her, wanting to know what brought the Altean to the training facility. 

“Pidge,” Allura addressed when she got there. “Hi! Just the person I was meaning to talk to.”

“What's up?” Pidge tried acting casual but it's a little weird being in the same room as her friend's future wife even if she didn't know it. 

“I've been meaning to ask,” Allura got closer to Pidge and lowered her voice. “What exactly  _ did  _ you and Lance see when we all accidentally went to the alternate realities? You're behavior has changed around each other and I'm simply curious.”

Pidge froze. Is she supposed to explain exactly what she saw? How does she tell a princess that she was making out with her best friend? Allura would probably be super scandalized considering how she gets around little swear words. 

“We kissed,” Pidge decided on. A kiss is enough to convey what made them freak out. Does she mention what happened last night with the second dream? “Yeah, we kissed and since we're best friends it was super weird.”

“Strange,” Allura contemplated this. “I would've thought you know would both be happy about something like that happening.”

“In a way I was,” Pidge likes the fact that they kissed because his lips felt amazing, but just without the whole taking off the clothes part. “I've thought about him and us for a pretty good while now, but he doesn't feel the same.”

Allura's eyebrows furrowed. “I thought he did. Did he personally tell you?”

It makes sense for Allura to mistake them for something romantic. They were always hanging around each other. Pidge doesn't blame her for getting it wrong. “He doesn't need to. I just know.”

Allura stayed silent for a moment. She tapped her chin, probably deep in thought. “I really thought you both had romantic interest in each other. I heard from Hunk that you might've even been engaging in sexual intercourse-”

“Don't finish that sentence!” Pidge yelled, covering Allura's mouth so she doesn't continue. She did not want to hear anything that Hunk said about sexual intercourse. How is Allura so bold about saying that? “I can assure you there is nothing sexual happening.” Maybe not now, but apparently in the future. 

“That's good to hear,” Allura smiled. “Although, I have noticed that Lance is changing his sheets almost every night, and Hunk explained to me that it's because he's mas-”

“Oh god I didn't need to know that.” Pidge was fine going the rest of her life without the knowledge that her best friend regularly masturbates to the point that his sheets need to be changed. What can even be that good? “Teenage boys will be boys, I guess.”

“Since we're on the topic of boys…” Allura clapped her hands happily. “How do you feel about any of the Paladins besides Lance? Or is there a boy back home?”

“Definitely no one back home,” Pidge almost laughed at the thought of any Garrison boy liking her. “Don't tell anybody, but Lance is the only one that I have eyes for.”

This felt… nice. She never had any female friends to talk to. Granted, she's never even had a crush, but it's fun laughing and daresay she's even giggling about the cute boys on the ship. 

Allura herself giggled. “I definitely called it. At some point, Lance had come to me all worried that you and  _ Keith  _ were a thing, and then  _ I  _ got scared and it was a mess and-”

“Wait,” Pidge paused. Did she say that Lance thought her and Keith were something? “When did Lance say any of this?”

“Not that long ago,” Allura confirmed. “While you were healing in the pod after Olkarion, I went to check up on you. Of course, Lance was there and he went on and on about the possibility of you being with Keith.”

Pidge almost shoved Allura out of the way so she could go find Lance and slap him right across the face. How could he say something like that to somebody who doesn't understand what a rumor is? “I can assure you that is absolute bullshit. I am not with Keith in any romantic way, shape, or form.”

Allura pretended to wipe fake sweat from her forehead. At least one of them is still in the mood to joke around. “Thank goodness. After Lance pointed it out, I noticed how close you and Keith were. And I was scared… well because…”

She trailed off, and Pidge couldn't help but pay attention to the bright red blush now all over the princess' face. “Allura?” Pidge made her voice super teasing for such a happy occasion this has turned into. “Is it just me, or are you blushing because we're talking about Keith?”

“Shh! Don't tell anyone else,” Allura looked around to check if there was somebody else in the room. “But I think I might have a… what do you call it? A crush. On Keith.”

Oh, she is  _ for sure  _ reporting this little talk back to Keith as soon as she gets the chance. It's too good for him not to know. If Lance ever went to him about her, she'd for sure want to know. That, and this is Keith's future wife. He'll be happy to know that she feels the same. 

“I called it!” Pidge threw a fist in the air as she whooped. She's so happy for her friends right now. If she can't get the boy that she wants, at least her friends found each other. “Holy crap I knew it.”

“Does he ever,” Allura bit her lip as Pidge calmed down. “Does he ever talk about me?”

“Only all the damn time!” Pidge shouted a little loudly. She cleared her throat. “Ahem, sorry. Literally earlier today as I ranted about all my personal girl problems, he started talking about you. He likes you back, for sure.”

“Keith has a crush on me?” Allura asked, but with no hint of doubt in her voice. Even as she questioned it, she was confident about it. She knew he felt the same way, not needing any kind of outside confirmation. 

Must be nice. “He  _ totally  _ has a crush on you,” Pidge repeated. “He's crazy about you, and it doesn't take a genius to figure it out.”

“You're a genius,” Allura pointed out. “You make keyboards… What did Hunk say it was? You make keyboards your bitch.” Pidge's eyes widened. What the hell has Hunk been telling the poor princess? “You're amazing with technology. But what's happening with Lance?”

Of course the conversation strayed back to her and Lance. “You can't tell anybody,” Pidge warned. “But the kiss didn't happen in an alternate reality. It was the future.”

Allura stayed silent for a moment before nodding. “Then how can you say that he doesn't like you back?”

“Because in the future,” Pidge didn't know what to do with her hands so they settled on her hips. “I kept thinking about how he hurt me. He  _ hurts  _ me in the future. How else could hurt me rather than not liking me back and still kissing me?”

“Pidge,” Allura put a hand on her shoulder. “Hunk has told me that you're being stupid with your crush on Lance.” Yeah, Hunk is definitely being murdered later. “But I don't think that's the case. You can't believe that he would ever like you back, so you're in denial. You deny the thought of it happening. You know it's there but you deny it because you can't believe it.”

What's there? There can't possibly be something there, right? Because Lance doesn't like girls like her, right? “When did you become so smart?”

“Since me and Hunk started hanging out more,” Allura shrugged. “I wanted to know more about Earth and he's been helping me.”

So that's why she knows so much about everything. Because her and Hunk are total snark buddies. Pidge is absolutely going to be planning Hunk's funeral later. But, she does like that other people consider keyboards her bitches. She likes the sound of that. 

“You didn't ask Keith for help?” Pidge smirked. She likes having a female friend to tease about their crushes. Her and Allura have never really sat down and had a women talk. This is nice, and she could definitely get used to it. 

Allura blushed red again on the topic of Keith. “I don't understand how I'm usually so put together with the perfect poise, but when I'm with Keith I get so… vulnerable and even weak.”

“That's what having a crush does to you.” Pidge thought about the way her knees buckled and weird sounds coming out of her as he kissed her breathless. She knows exactly how Allura is feeling. “It makes you expose the vulnerable parts of you.”

“I'm not sure I completely like that,” Allura wrinkled her nose. “I like being strong all the time. I don't like how weak and sometimes even stupid I can be around him.”

“You don't have to change yourself,” Pidge thought that was obvious. “You can still be a strong princess who's in love. Don't let love cloud your mind. I know exactly what you mean by being stupid, too.”

“How can you be stupid?” Allura asked. “You're the smartest one on the ship.”

She thought back to the way Lance left her room crying. How she let herself die when she was seconds away from being rescued. “I can have very poor judgement. Plus, I'm impulsive.”

Allura nodded. “I don't know what to do with Keith. Do I tell him I like him? What am I supposed to do?”

“Maybe wait for Keith to tell you.” He's going to be the one tripping out the most. While he might like her, he's going to want some time to adjust to this. “He would probably want to be the one to do it.”

“Are you waiting for Lance?” Allura asked, a small smile on her face. “You guys kiss anyways, so why wait?”

The question left Pidge choking on her own spit. “Gah!” She yelled as she started coughing. When Allura patted her back, she caught a glimpse of someone else at the door. She tried making out who was at the door through her watery eyes. “I'm good,” she told the princess when she had calmed down. 

But Allura's eyes were trained on the door of the training facility. Pidge turned around to see what she was staring at. And she swore her heart must've stopped or started beating so fast that she couldn't feel it. 

Lo and behold, there was Lance. 

Allura patted her on the shoulder. “Lance, hey!”

Pidge nodded her head at him. His eyes were the first thing she noticed. They were bloodshot, though had no tears. They weren't even super red. Only a light pink color. 

“Hey guys,” Lance awkwardly greeted. He rubbed the back of his neck, his hair getting in his eyes. “Um, I was actually looking for you, Pidge.”

“She was busy choking, sorry,” Allura laughed this off like a joke. She doesn't know what happened in the dream. She doesn't know how far that kiss was escalating. She doesn't know that Lance cried earlier today. 

“Hehe, yeah,” Lance looked away from the two and up at the ceiling but Pidge was staring at him. “Pidge, can we talk?”

“That'll be my cue to leave,” Allura awkwardly patted her shoulder before leaving the training facility. 

“What's up?” Pidge asked once Allura had awkwardly left the room, closing the door behind her. Probably would've been better if that door had been left open. 

“We need to talk,” Lance addressed her. This was unlike she had heard before. He sounded almost… annoyed. She had heard the way he sounds when he gets irritated, but it had never been anything like this. Nothing ever even close to this. 

“Yeah…” As much as she didn't want to agree, he was right. He had stormed out of her room crying, and that was obviously something they needed to lay down on the table. 

“I can't really explain what happened back in your room earlier,” Lance sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. “But I can say that it has to do with the dream. Pidge, why would you run headfirst into danger by considering the Blade? I try hard to keep you alive? You've already almost died. What's Matt going to say when someone tells him his baby sister died in some dream? He's not here, so I assume that you haven't told him. He has to know eventually. How is he going to feel about me when he finds out that I wasn't fast enough with my lion-”

“Lance,” she cut him off with a small laugh. She finds it highly amusing how stressed out he’s getting over her. “Like you said, it’s just some dream. I didn’t tell anybody but Keith about it to avoid any more of these crazy ideas everyone would get?”   


“Why’d you tell Keith?” Lance asked, suddenly defensive. “I didn’t say anything because I know it’s your death and you would come out a say it if you wanted to, but if you were going to say anything to anyone, why  _ Keith?  _ Not even Shiro?”

Pidge was starting to get tired of him and some of the bullshit he sprouted sometimes. “You mean like telling Allura that you thought me and Keith were in some secret relationship, also scaring the poor girl?”

“Why did Allura get scared?” If she wasn’t so goddamn tired, she might’ve laughed. But instead tried not to pay attention to the cute way his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“You’re not stupid,” Pidge rolled her eyes. “You should know what’s going on between Keith and Allura at this point.”

_ “I’m  _ the stupid one when it comes to seeing the way other people feel?” He pointed to himself as he spoke, anger slowly filling his face. “I really can’t believe you even said that. You are truly one of the dumbest people I’ve  _ ever  _ known if you can insult me like that. Look at yourself! Look who’s talking when you say that I can’t tell how others are feeling! It would be a goddamn miracle if you can figure out what’s been happening between us.”

Pidge took a step back to avoid his angry rage. She could feel the way his words rolled off of his tongue so easily. Had he always been this mad? Or had she really not known him well enough to know.

She thought back to what Allura had said earlier. That she  _ does  _ know where Lance is standing about where they were trying to take their friendship. That she's only in denial. It seems impossible to even think he could like her back. Allura had to be misreading the signs or something. She would have to have solid evidence to be convinced. 

“First of all,” Pidge shot back. “I never said you can't tell what other people are feeling. Although now, you clearly can't because you obviously don't know when to back off if a person is very mad at you in the moment.”

“I have way more reason to be mad at you,” Lance stepped closer to her to replace the little space that had been between them when she moved backwards. He definitely seems eager to fuck personal space. 

“Why the hell would you think that?” Pidge retorted. “All you've done around me lately in get upset at everything I do. Are you for real trying to make me hate you so we don't have to kiss in the future? Is the idea so imposing to you?”

Lance gave her what almost looked like a sad smile before he got angry again. “Me? You're the one being a dick. We get the vision of the future and you run off with Keith to the kitchen. I can deal with that. We have to go to Olkarion and you seemed almost… mad at the thought of anybody else taking him with them. Then, you almost die. And that I could not live with. That, and he actually made you consider joining the Blade. Even after seeing something that suggests you possibly dying, you continue to put the Blade in your head. After being vulnerable for a night, you  _ still  _ consider hi- the Blade!”

“What's with your weird obsession?” Pidge had gotten in his face now, shoving a finger in his chest. “Why do you have to freak out over everything me and Keith do? You've never done this before, and need I remind you,  _ you're  _ the one who ran off in the morning before I even woke up after the dream. I'm not the one who purposely avoided you!”

“I'm only getting like this because it all happened right after the vision,” Lance looked away from her to up at the ceiling. “Right after we saw that, you started to drift closer and closer to Keith. Did you see something else, possibly, that made you try pursing Keith? Or do I just not mean anything to you that you're able to so easily dismiss me like this?”

“That's totally unfair! I don't like Keith in any romantic way. I know for a certain that I never will. I didn't think I had to explain to you that I'm allowed to have other friends! You know, the way that a friendship that has actual mutual respect functions. I can have other friends that are guys who aren't you, just so you fucking know.”

“That's not what I meant, and you know it.”

“Then what the hell do you mean?” Pidge was just… so tired of this. She was done having to guess his emotions and the way that he felt so she could make them happy. Because he shouldn't be dragging and weighing her down as much as he is right now. 

“You really don't know what I mean?” Lance asked, so close to her that she swears she could smell his scent. She's so unable to describe what it is. His slightly damp hair tells her that he was in the shower not too long ago. Maybe it's his soap she's smelling.

Wait. She's supposed to be mad at him because he was just yelling at her Doe the stupidest things.  _ Grrrr.  _

“Obviously not dumbass.”

“Then let me show you.”

Pidge was about to murmur a thanks until Lance pulled her into him by the collar and kissed her. 

She was definitely taken by surprise as she tensed up, eyes blown open because  _ holy fuck Lance's lips feel just as nice as she always thought they would.  _ It was so much of a surprise that she tripped over her foot, causing the both of them to fall over. 

As scary as the situation is, as confusing as it is, they both started laughing once Lance had landed on her, both laughing at the hilarity of her actually being toppled down. 

“Guess I swept you off your feet?” Lance was clearly cringing as he said his god awful pick up line. 

Even though she wanted to go back and address the fact that he had just been  _ yelling  _ at her, she brought her fingers up to ghost on her lips. This is her first kiss - holy fuck. 

This had all just hit her. 

Lance McClain, her crush of who even knows how long, just kissed her. He had taken time to think about it. Or maybe he didn't and did it on impulse. Would make sense. Nothing in this situation makes any fucking sense. He's her first kiss. He's the first boy she's kissed. She's never encountered one as amazing as him, but of every boy she's ever interacted with, this was still her first kiss. 

What the fuck. He already did it, so it had to be okay for her to return the favor, right? 

Pidge put her arms around his shoulders and pulled him down against her, not caring that their noses slightly bumped. She pressed her lips against his, feeling that tingly feeling all the way down to her hips as she savored this moment. 

For all their argument was worth, this was way better. She definitely preferred the way his mouth felt against hers, his hands settling on her waist as she sighed into the kiss, loving the feeling of his hands and his lips and  _ Lance.  _

How could one person make a kiss feel so great? Maybe the only reason it feels nice is because of who's on the receiving end of her. A kiss shouldn't be leaving her so breathless, right? Because she definitely feels like if one of them doesn't pull back she's going to pass out underneath him. 

Thank god Lance had the same respiratory system as she did because he pulled back, his forehead resting against hers. She stared into his eyes, realizing the fact that they were half lidded. She was about to question that until she felt something poke her thigh. 

_ Oh.  _

Even though Pidge never had experience kissing teenage boys, she knew what it meant when something hard starts to poke her in the leg. She knew exactly what it was. What she didn't understand was why he had one. 

Did she do that? 

She for sure didn’t feel aroused in any sense. Maybe his mind is replaying the vision and that turned him on. Strange, because between the two of them, she had probably thought of it way more and yet, it didn’t pop up in her mind yet.

While he’s weirdly aroused, she’s confused.

She wanted to go in for another kiss. She’s in love with the way his body shapes around her. She always thought about how perfect they would fit together in a situation like this. The argument continued to replay in her mind, but she tried to stay in the moment right now. 

Lance quickly stood up, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. He didn't say anything besides a quick, “Sorry,” that he mumbled. He almost ran with the way he was speed walking. Had he meant to do that? 

Pidge touched her lips with her fingers, only thinking about the impossible that this had to mean. Because people who are just friends don't kiss. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this in bed with a fever so sorry if some parts don't make sense I was probably dying 💀💀 especially towards the end I tried to make it cute but I actually ended up almost puking soooo
> 
> Also this stupid fucking fever gave me a fuckung blisters on my mouth so my mouth is in so much pain I'm dead. Like seriously dead. Idk how this chapter came to be. Just know I'm dead now. 
> 
> Thank my brother for getting me sick. It's his fault.


	7. i just can't look it's killing me

“Whose idea was it to drug Pidge?”

“Yo, she hasn't slept just go with it.”

Pidge tried not to chuckle when she stood outside the dining room, listening in to the rest of the Paladins argue about who the genius was to drug her. Spoiler alert because she was able to remember it from earlier; it was Keith. He came into the training facility, gave her a water bottle, and then she woke up in her room.

She was almost as confused about that as she was after the kiss. Granted, she didn't get to think much about it thanks to Keith. It might've been a good idea for him to do that, actually. She didn't waste hours from today replaying and replaying a kiss in her head.

He had kissed her first. She only responded to it, and he didn't exactly pull away until he realized he was pushing his erection into her. That had definitely killed the mood and finally allowed them to place some kind of barrier.

As much as everyone would call her stupid when it came to relationship stuff, she knew what it meant when someone kissed you. She can't even be that dumb. She twisted the kiss in every way she thought possible to try to make some excuse as to why he kissed her without liking her, but there was nothing.

“Hey guys,” Pidge awkwardly greeted when she entered. She searched the table quickly and relaxed when she realized Lance wasn't there yet. She was going to have to face him sooner or later, but not when she's trying to eat. She just wants that in peace.

“Sorry for drugging you,” Keith apologized. “I saw you in the dining hall and I knew you probably didn't sleep well, provided the dream you had, so Coran gave me a little something to help put you under.”

Wait. Keith told them about the dream? Can't be because no one is flipping out. Coran decided to answer the unasked question, “While I do wish Keith had waited until night to give you the drink, it still works. If you ever have dreams about yalmors again, then I'll be sure to brew up some more. Strange fear, is it not?”

Pidge glared at Keith as he helplessly shrugged. He  _ really  _ told the rest of the team that she's afraid of freaking yalmors? They're really cute in a hideous kind of way. Kinda like Lance. His attitude towards her has definitely seen its ugly days. But, he's also been one of the best people in the world to her, so there's that.

She sat down quickly at the table next to Hunk before Lance could come and then they're both stuck awkwardly standing there. She served herself food goo before eating little bites. That drug had taken some of her appetite out. She has to rant about this to him.

“What'd you do after training, Pidge?” Shiro asked. He jerked a little and let out a silent ‘oof', as well as a pouting face at Hunk when he reached down a bit to rub his shin. “What? I'm simply curious to know what my Paladins are up to when they're not busy.”

“Some hanging with Keith,” she nodded towards Keith raising a hand. “A little bit of girl talk with Allura,” she winked at the princess who laughed back at her and glanced at Keith. “Besides that nothing interesting.” Lot's of things happened afterwards that were very interesting. She's just not ecstatic about sharing this information with the rest of the team.

“That's all you did?” Pidge turned to see who had spoken, and saw Lance standing in the doorway. “I could've sworn we hung out after you were with Allura.”

“We did,” Pidge averted her eyes to avoid his gaze. Because then all she would think about is his lips on hers and that would send her into a raging blush. “You weren't here so I didn't think to bring it up.”

“Oh,” Lance shrugged, moving from the door and sitting down next to Keith who was across from her. “Yeah.”

The silence that followed afterwards made everything awkward. It wasn't this way before she walked in. Was it her and Lance making everything tense? Can everyone really sense the kind of tension going on between them? She doesn't like how everyone is poking around her or at least know how she is. It's amazing how Allura ever mistaken her and Keith for anything.

Keith cleared his throat, finally making  _ some  _ kind of noise. “Well, I'm reporting back to the Blade in the morning. They have some information about what happened with Ryner so I'll be back soon with that information.”

“So you'll be back?” Lance clarified.

“Yeah,” Keith rolled his eyes and looked to the left of him, staring down Lance. “I know it's not a problem.”

Lance rolled his eyes back. “It's not. Just- I'll tell you after.” He turned back to his plate, looking down at it. The dining room went back to complete, awkward silence. They all sat there, unsure of what to do.

Especially Pidge. She didn't know if she should call Matt since they can be total snark buddies, or take Keith out of the room so she can tell him and he could tell her what to do, or leap across the table onto Lance and just kiss his stupid face again. She doesn't know. She's never had to deal with stupid boys and crushes before.

“Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to give Pidge that sleeping juice,” Coran wondered aloud, scratching his chin as he looked at her.

“Then why'd you let me drug her?” Keith slammed his hand down on the table as he zeroed on Coran.

“You drugged her!?” Lance yelled, staring at Keith.

Keith looked away from Coran to smile at Lance. “Yep!” Then that's when something weird happened. Keith leaned into Lance so close that Pidge is surprised she heard what Keith whispered. “Even carried her back to her room when she knocked out.”

That must've been some kind of a last straw for Lance because he stood up quickly, banging his knee against the table. He chose to ignore it, instead pointing a finger at Pidge. “You. Outside. We need to talk.”

Pidge chuckled nervously as she studied the expression on the others faces. Shiro and Hunk both looked worried, Allura was hiding her face behind her hands, Coran was watching the scene unfold, and Keith had a shit eating grin plastered across his face. Knowing she had to eventually, she stood up from her comfortable place at the table and walked out the room.

“What the hell?” Lance asked as soon as the door clicked shut. They started making their way down the twisting hallways of the castle, though she was very unaware of where they were actually going.

Speaking of unaware, she's very confused as to why Lance just yelled at her. “What did I do? Don't randomly go off on me like this when I have no idea what you're talking about.”

“So you casually let Keith carry you to your room after what happened earlier?’ Lance looked away from her in disgust. “I thought I was laying everything down on the table when I kissed you but I guess if you  _ still  _ can't see it and you're up on Keith, then I don't know why I'm wasting my time here.”

“For god fucking sake,” Pidge ran a hand through her hair. Was he really starting to make these kind of assumptions? “I didn't even know! I was drugged! I had no idea what he was giving me was going to put me to sleep in the first place. How am I supposed to let myself be carried when I was asleep when it happened? You have to be a special kind of stupid to think like that.”

“Do you know what it meant when I kissed you?” Suddenly, they were outside of his room. When had they gotten here? Why were they here? “I kissed you first, and you have to know why.”

Pidge averted her eyes. As much as she tried to twist it, she knew deep down that the kiss meant he likes her back. You don't just kiss somebody you have no feelings for. Or at least Lance isn't a boy like that. She knows what it means, and she's absolutely terrified.

“I'm honestly a little scared, Lance,” Pidge leaned against his door. “We have so many game nights late where both of us are barely clothed, we go to each other for absolutely everything and I don't want to mess up our friendship in pursuit of something else.”

“Is this you rejecting me?” Lance raised an eyebrow. Is he amused by this? Because the stupid grin on his face told her he was showing no remorse. “Because I'm having a hard time believing you would say no to me so easily.”

“I don't, and I never will, like Keith,” Pidge took a step closer to him, deciding to be bold. If he could be flirty and confident, then she'll do her best to mirror that. “And this right here is me showing you that.”

Before she could lose her nerve, Pidge stepped on her toes to kiss Lance. Sure, the angle was weird because she was standing up as tall as she could and he was leaning down at an angle that made her uncomfortable to watch, but it still felt perfect. He responded almost immediately.

In the span of a few seconds, she was being lifted against his waist. She hooked her ankles around him as he pushed her into the wall as he struggled with the doorknob. They just kept going; kiss after kiss. Everytime they broke apart, they connected again, unable to go even a few seconds without each other.

Eventually, Lance managed to open the door. He walked backwards, taking her with him. He closed the door by lightly slamming her against it, not moving from that position. She sighed at his slight aggression, finding it somewhat hot? Did she just discover that she's a bottom? Oh no.

This was supposed to be a simple kiss to show him that she did truly care for him. She tried to pour her entire love into this kiss so he wouldn't walk out of her life, but it's starting to turn into something completely different. Something she wasn't expecting. It's not even late, but they were definitely escalating. And she doesn't know how this happened exactly.

Maybe her sigh didn't stay that way because he groaned, and a tiny moan slipped from her mouth because he was now holding her up with his hands on her ass. They were leaving a mess of each other's spit on each other, something that would probably gross her out later. But the way his tongue felt inside of her mouth was distracting her too much to consider how far they were going.

The first two kisses had some kind of innocence to them. They were simply meant to tell each other what the other meant to them. At least, it was until Lance decided to pop a boner and run off. Now, she could definitely feel his arousal pressing against her thigh, and she didn't mind it in the slightest. If anything, it even got  _ her  _ a little turned on. Her crotch was starting to dampen.

After yet another kiss, he moved from her mouth, a trail of spit following his lips when he connected to her jawline. He ran his mouth up and down her neck, her cheek, along her jaw, and even her earlobe at some point.

That's when she felt his lips attach to her collarbone. He started to lightly suck, but it left Pidge throwing her head back and allowing it, running a hand through his hair as he continued. He probably took this as encouragement as he kept going, sucking a little harder. She could feel him nip at her skin and lick the bite to sooth it, and she felt incredible.

Not only that, but she was starting to feel really warm. With Lance's hard on pushing against her with every movement they made, and his lips on that one specific area, plus her uncomfortably damp underwear, she knew where this was going. And she wasn't sure she wanted it pressed against his door.

“There,” Lance moved away from her neck and ghosted her lips. He ran his fingers along where he had been kissing. “At least now everyone on the ship can know what’s happening.”

“Shut up and kiss me again,” Pidge pulled him by the collar and reconnected their lips. For as little experience as she had, she thought she was doing pretty good. She had to have been doing something right for him to keep kissing her the way he is right now.

His hard on lightly brushed her core, and she exploded. They might have been against his door and they were fully clothed, but that didn’t stop her from trying to grind herself against his body, desperate for any kind of release for this feeling of want. Why was she feeling this way from a simple kiss? A year worth of friendship and sexual tension, perhaps.

It probably is the two years combined of being at the Garrison and then the ship. An innocent kiss turning dirty shouldn't be as much as a surprise as it is, especially after an argument. Their emotions are jumping all over the place, and both times they had kissed, they were angry with each other. It had to do something with their hormone levels because there's no way Pidge would ever kiss him without him saying directly that he likes her.

“Yes ma’am,” Lance groaned before kissing her again.

“Pidge, you're needed in the green lion's hanger,” Keith's voice rang through the intercoms around the castle.

“Damn,” they both cursed under their breath. He set her down on the floor. She made awkward finger guns at him and started walking backwards until she opened the door and was outside.

Then she broke into a run.

What the fuck was she thinking? She just kissed him. She kissed Lance very intensely and left him without even saying goodbye. Well, earlier he left. The reasoning is still a bit unclear but she'd put good money on it being because of his boner.

Oh god. This is  _ bad.  _ Even if they miraculously happen or whatever, if things go sour, they can't go back to the way things used to be. There's no coming back from something like this. This is something that they can't take back. And that's bad.

Keith immediately ran to her when she arrived at the hanger. He first placed his hand on her forehead as if checking for a fever. He narrowed his eyes at her. She probably did look ridiculous, cheeks red and a little sweaty. Her body temperature has definitely risen.

“Fuck…” He muttered. “Oh man. I'm so sorry… Ah fuck.”

Pidge tilted her head in confusion. “What?”

“That drink I gave you for you to sleep?” Keith ran a hand through his hair. “Turns out it wasn't to make you sleep. It's something that makes you do everything on impulse. It's basically a drug to tear people about. And I think I may know why Coran gave it to me for you to have.”

That made sense as to why Pidge would kiss Lance in the first place. She wasn't dumb and knew what a kiss meant. But there's still doubt in her mind. She listened as Keith gave his theory about Coran. “You know how Ryner was kinda being controlled? I have reason to believe that Coran is experiencing the same thing.”

Pidge waited for the reason, but never got one. She assumed Keith would tell her later, when he's got more reasoning. So instead, she asked something from earlier. “Why did you purposely try to make Lance mad when he always gets upset about us hanging out?”

Keith smirked. “I knew he would avoid talking to you about the issues you guys have because he doesn't wanna take away from the kiss. I know the way he is. All I did was give him the motivation to actually discuss it. Plus, you dying probably gave him a scare.”

That… actually made sense because it's exactly what she was doing. She wanted to avoid him at all costs. Or at least for now. She didn't want to be crushed by a harsh truth, even though she already knows what everything means. Looking at it, it's completely possible for people to change their minds after a kiss.

“I guess I have to tell Matt sooner or later about that dream,” Pidge shrugged. “I mean, I guess he has a right to know or whatever.”

Keith snickered. “You should probably put it off for a little longer. Unless you want him to see that giant hickey on your neck.”

Pidge's eyes went wide in horror as she searched for a mirror. A window. Something with a reflection.  _ Something.  _ She resorted to her bayard's reflection, focusing on her neck. Sure enough, right where her collarbone is, a purple bruise as large as a quarter.

Shiro is going to kill them.

“It's a mosquito bite,” she quickly lied. “Yep.”

Keith raised an eyebrow. “In space?”

“It's a space mosquito.” When Keith didn't buy into her excuse, she sighed. “Don't tell anybody, but it happened while me and Lance were talking. The impulse drug forced me to kiss him and it kind of escalated. A lot.”

“I can see that,” Keith laughed. “Have fun trying to explain to Shiro why his daughter has a raging hickey on her neck.”

Pidge already has that covered. “What hickey? It's just a mosquito bite.” She winked at him. “See you when you get back, Keith.” She waved goodbye at her friend, already anticipating his arrival for whenever he comes back.

*

“Knock knock,” Hunk said as he walked into Pidge's room without knocking.

“Asshole,” she rolled her eyes, setting aside her tablet. “The whole point of saying you're going to knock is to actually knock. If not, it defeats the whole purpose of announcing your knock.”

“I thought me saying I'm going to knock replaces the actual knock,” Hunk shook his head. “Anyways, what are you going to tell Shiro about your neck?”

Pidge's hand fluttered up to the purple bruise. “The truth. It was a mosquito bite.”

“Oh thank god!” Shiro entered the room, not having been far behind Hunk. “I was actually really scared that something else had happened between you and another one of my Paladins. Can't have my kids running around my house doing inappropriate acts, can I?”

Pidge chuckled nervously, wanting to sink into her bed. “Totally!”

“Hey guys?” They all turned to see Allura also standing by the doorway. “Hate to interrupt this interrogation session, but I saw Lance leave his room and I'm going to assume he's on his way over here.”

As if on cue, Lance walked up to the doorway to join the rest of the magic school bus. “Hey everybody.”

“Hey mosquito,” Hunk greeted. Pidge went red in the face. Her team wasn't dumb, but she had hoped that her version of what happened was at least enough for them to stop bothering her. At least for now while her and Lance sort through everything that they need to.

“Hey?” Lance greeted back in confusion, turning to face everybody else. “Guys, is it okay if I talk to Pidge?”

Shiro stood next to Pidge as she sat up from her lying position on the bed. “Keep talking.”

Lance rolled his eyes. “I mean alone.”

Hunk motioned for everybody to follow him outside of the room, leaving the two teens alone. He gave her a soft smile before closing the door behind him, submitting the two into whatever fate is destined for them.

As soon as the door clicked shut, Lance speed walked across the room to her and kissed her.

She was definitely caught off guard, but only tensed up for around two seconds before responding. Instead of the heated kiss from earlier and the confusing one also from earlier, this was soft. Gentle. Nothing like the previous ones.

When Lance pulled away, he smiled at her. “I just had to do that.”

“Can we talk?” Pidge played with a piece of thread that was hanging off of his shirt as he was still  _ really  _ close to her. “Like, talk about all the crazy stuff that's been happening between us? Because you know we really need to.”

Lance smiled again, but this one seemed sad. “Maybe. But not right now.”

“We can't keep putting this off, Lance!” Pidge yelled, unable to bite her tongue due to the drug. “You keep holding back and we're not getting anywhere. We know where the other is on terms of feelings but now we need to sort this out! I'm sick of having to suffer because you're either too scared or too lazy to try and figure something out! Don't I mean anything?”

Take it back. The look on Lance’s face said everything she needed to know. Her words had been way too harsh. She hurt him by lashing out. The drug Coran gave her wasn't so she can impulse kiss him and that hopefully tear them apart. It's so the aftermath of that kiss can ruin their relationship slowly.

“You mean too much to me,” Lance ran a hand through his hair as he turned around to the door. “But for now, I think I need to clear my head.” He turned on his heel and left. He left  _ her.  _ He didn't just leave the conversation. He left so many things when he walked out the door.

And Pidge had no control over her body except to make a hole in her wall, promptly breaking her hand.

*

“You're so lucky, yet stupid,” Hunk chided her. “You're so damn lucky that I'm the one who caught you sneaking to the infirmary. Stupid for breaking your hand, yes. But lucky that Shiro or Keith weren't wandering around the hallways because they both would've flipped.”

Maybe Hunk conveniently left out Lance. Or maybe Lance simply stopped giving a shit about her. Pidge regretted everything she had said, and waited so patiently for the stupid drug to finally wear off. If Keith's theory is right, she's totally going to throw hands at Coran.

“Then good thing Keith left already,” Pidge shrugged. “Plus, Shiro would've probably forgotten about the mosquito bite if he saw I had a broken hand. Allura would probably just try to fix me. Lance wouldn't care.”

Hunk whistled low. “Whatever is happening between you guys, I only hope you can figure it out. Everyone hates seeing you guys glaring daggers or sticking your tongues down each other's throats. Nobody believes the mosquito bite excuse.”

“Shiro does.” But she knew he didn't. She's trying to convince herself. “Besides, nothing is going to be happening between me and Lance for a while now…” She trailed off when she saw her door wide open.

“Pidge?” Hunk asked, eyebrow raised.

Pidge walked into her room, eyes scanning for any sign of an intruder or danger. That's when her eyes landed on a piece of paper of her bed. She picked it up, and promptly dropped it after reading it.

_ Hey. Thought about what you said. Left with Keith to ponder over your motives. Be back whenever he's back. Shiro said it's okay already. _

_ -Lance _

“Pidge?” Hunk asked again.

That's the moment Pidge ran into Hunk's arms, clinging on desperately. He left her. Lance left her. He's really done with her. There's nothing she can do about it besides wait for the stupid drug to wear off.

Great, it wins.

It tore quite a fine hole in her and Lance's relationship. What now? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay lemme explain lol
> 
> School and cheer were taking up my life and now with nationals and competition season over, I found time to write.... 
> 
> In a way?? I mean I wrote this AT my competition and during my AP English class so yeeeaaah
> 
> Idk, I didn't really have inspiration for this chapter?? Like I was so busy with school and sports but I wanted to write but I didn't know what to write so this chaptyed came to be
> 
> I honestly hope that everything just makes sense like with the drug and all that. Lance's motives will be explained I swear but while I settle down from competition season and get into stunt season (a whole new ballgame) this is what we gotta deal with lol
> 
> Tumblr - soleaa
> 
> :)


	8. see you when i get home

Pidge was devastated.

Promptly, she went to Shiro and demanded to know why he would allow Lance to leave. With everything happening between them, she just hoped that at least the drug would wear off by the time he got back.

Yelling at Shiro was probably something caused from the drug. She has too much respect for him, and having had known him for pretty much her entire teenage years, she would never imagine herself yelling at him. But, this drug was designed to tear people apart.

“Why would you do that?” Was the first thing she demanded, Hunk at her heels. He was trying to coax her to stay calm and take deep breaths, but right now, her words aren't even coming out properly. They're slurring in a way. “Why would you let him leave?”

Shiro was calmly reading a book, and winced at her distraught state. “He told me some separation might be necessary in order to clear his head. We need to be able to form Voltron, and we can't do that with you two arguing. The space is good for you guys.”

“You let him leave me!” Pidge responded, not giving a care in the world about who she was talking to. She was too angry. “You're letting him walk out of my life like this! What if something attacks and we need him here? How are we going to form Voltron then?”

Shiro closed his book, clearly contemplating the situation at hand. “I've already established everything. We have some down time right now. You've almost died, Pidge. There's no battle now, but when he comes back and if one arisis, then we can't have you marching off into dangerous situations.”

“How do you know we're free right now?” She demanded. Hunk had a hand on her shoulder, and she shrugged it off. “You don't know that nothing can't attack us. Look at Kerberos. You didn't think anything was going to attack you then!”

“Pidge, calm down.” What Hunk didn't know was that by saying that, he was signing his own death warrant. He was very quickly going to learn that he would regret speaking in the first place.

She turned at him, murder on her mind and death written all over her face. Calmly, she spoke, “How the everloving fuck would you like me to calm down? What would you do if Shay left you for somebody better because I'm _sure_ she could definitely find that-”

“Pidge!” Shiro yelled. He put his non prosthetic arm on her shoulder, jerking her to face him. “I understand that you are in a state of anger right now, but that is _no_ way you treat and talk to a teammate and family.”

“Why?” She shrugged, Shiro's hand falling from her shoulder. “You let Lance treat me like shit.”

Shiro paused again. “Honestly? I think you both are just super emotional and full of stupid hormones because you guys are teenagers. Teenagers who clearly feel something towards each other. Space is needed so you both can figure something out.”

This is completely new to Pidge.

Up until now, she had been used to having Lance around her. Just his presence had been enough. Their video game sessions and simply sitting next to each other at dinner had and everything else had shaped their friendship into something truly beautiful. Now, they could both be craving more, and she didn't have him.

Which made her understand why everyone had been telling her she was hurting him.

She had never really made any advances towards him. She had been too scared to. How long had he been sending hints? She only realized everything very recently, but how long had he been controlling the urge to kiss her like they did in the vision?

Is that why he needed space? Because he though Pidge was ignoring his advances? She had completely taken advantage of him being there for her and never once stopped to think that his feelings could go deeper than friendship. She always thought about her fears about how she felt but never him.

The realization made her knees buckle.

She barely registered Hunk trying to hold her up, grabbing her by the arms. She sunk to the floor, legs feeling like jelly. Had the drug just finally taken away it's affect? That still doesn't explain how selfish she had acted for god knows how long. No drug did that. Only her.

It's a horrible feeling when a person realizes they've only been hurting someone when they hadn't meant to. He left her, and she wasn't even sure if she could be completely angry about it. Yeah, she had said some pretty harsh departing words, but this feels worse.

“Pidge?” Shiro asked, crouching beside her.

“I really fucked up,” she shook head. “Guys, I've been really stupid. I wasn't able to see how Lance felt until now. He left before I was ever given the chance to tell him about the way that I feel. Oh god…”

“Pidge,” Hunk addressed. “He didn't leave because he was mad at you. Well, actually, I don't know. But, if you can see what it was, then that's enough. It's progress. Because before, you couldn't even tell. At least now you can recognize his emotions.”

She buried her face in her hands. “I feel like such a bitch. And I said some pretty mean things before he left. That was probably the last straw…” Wait, why did he leave again? Oh, yeah, because Shiro allowed it. “But we could've made up by now. Why did you let him leave?”

Shiro looked dumbfounded. “You need to be able to form Voltron. That's never going to happen if you guys are fighting. I've said it again and again, but I understand your need for confirmation so I'll say it again: separation was necessary for the both of you.”

“Don't worry, Pidge,” Hunk took her wrist and made her look up at him. “He's coming back. If he doesn't, we'll kill him. If anything, it's the returning part that you guys need to figure out. You clearly need to figure some things out.”

So that's why, two days after that talk, Pidge found herself sulking in her room. She was incredibly bored. Has the castle always felt this boring? Or is it just because she doesn't have her best friend here to play video games with? It's not like she can even rant to Keith about this because he went too. At least he had a reason.

So that's why Pidge was staring at her ceiling, counting stars. At the space mall, she had managed to find the glow in the dark stars that are put on ceilings. She counted them all, but started losing count and restarted every time. This is what she's been reduced to: counting cheap plastic that lights up.

So that's why when Pidge heard a knock on her door, she almost fell off the bed. She had been so distracted by her own thoughts she barely registered any kind of sound. She groaned, not up for whatever Shiro or Hunk was going to tell her. Whatever it was, it could probably wait.

Seriously, she had been so bored, when Allura wanted to watch The Notebook (that she somehow managed to get a copy of), Pidge actually agreed. She wasn't all that into it, obviously, completely done with everything having to do with romance.

It had only been two days yet she somehow felt super deprived of someone she needed so desperately to talk to.

She had no idea if the drug had even wore off, but she did know she had to tell Lance what happened as soon as he gets back. Which also happened to be sooner than she thought because when she opened her door, already getting her eye roll ready, she opened it to find Lance.

The first thing she did was completely freeze. The second was to slowly gape at him. She had come up with multiple scenarios about what she'd do when she saw him again, but right now, all she could do was squeak out a small, “Lance…?”

Pidge's breath caught in her throat as Lance pressed his lips to hers.

He grabbed her by the hips and took everything that was on her desk and slid it off with one arm. Oh well. Whatever Pidge had on there probably wasn't even important.

Her fingers made their way to his hair, tangling in it as he took the scrunchie she had holding her hair in the ponytail out. He threw it somewhere to the side. Her hair tumbled around her shoulders, unable to make it past her collarbone.

He untangled her hair, the pull of whenever he got a particularly rough knot sending shivers down her spine and _oh god this better not be a new kink that she's discovered._ Because that's an embarrassing one but it feels nice.

The sigh that escaped her lips caused Lance to groan and lift her onto the desk. Her body slightly protested as he did it harshly with a slight sting, but she soon wasn't complaining as she felt his erection against her thigh.

Lance gripped her shirt and only broke the kiss to pull it off of her. She was exposed in a grey bra that he was now studying with great interest.

“So you're gonna keep staring or you gonna do something with them?” Pidge teased as he continued staring. She doesn't know where she got the confidence or ability from. How she's forming proper sentences is a mystery to her right now. Probably the drug.

“Fuck,” Lance groaned as he dug his face into the side of her neck. He cupped her breast and cradled them in his hands. His eyes were glued to them in her bra. “Fuck, Pidge…”

A needy moan escaped her when Lance sucked on the sensitive part of her neck. His teeth bit the area where her neck and collarbone connect, and the slight sting seemed to make it better. He lavished the bite with his tongue that was just in her mouth and down her throat.

“I forgot how much you love it when I kiss your neck there,” Lance smiled against her as he continued to leave a mark that Shiro was most definitely not going to believe was a mosquito bite like _last time._

“Lance,” she moaned out. “I swear to god right now…”

Who cares that it sounded aggressive and mean? Pidge wasn't about to let him get away with his kisses that she so desperately enjoyed, despite every bone in her body telling her to stop this now before they argue again. 

Who cares that they're in the castle right now and Shiro is probably going to burst in at any moment and stop this? She knew that her moans echoed around the room, and was most likely heard throughout the hallways.

Who cares that after this, he may leave again and not turn back? Even the power of the female body isn't enough to make him stay, considering what happened two days ago. After something that she had caused.

“This isn't a good idea,” she breathed as her ankles hooked around Lance's back to get him closer. He was so _close_ already but she needed him to be closer. She needed to feel him and throw all caution to the wind and hook up on her desk right now.

Maybe they shouldn't. With recent events, this is a horrible idea and is surely doing some kind of damage to what's going on between them. As if they needed this shit to be more complicated.

“You know what wasn't a good idea?” Lance asked, nuzzling her shoulder. “When I completely screwed you over two days ago, and here we are in this position.”

“That was a very bad idea that I have not forgotten,” Pidge threw her head back as Lance's erection pressed more into the inside of her thigh and was nearly touching her. “But for the time being, I'll forget all about it.”

“Did you like that?” Lance ask, his lidded eyes meeting hers and he looked back up at her. “Did you like the way that I push myself against you? Do you want me to do it again?”

Pidge nodded as his covered dick touched her almost where she wanted to but not exactly there and she wanted to yell. She wanted to beg him to please _just touch her_ but she would never let him know what he's doing to her body right now.

With her head thrown back, Lance took his opportunity to attack her exposed neck. He didn't even kiss it, the desire and lust making him sloppy as he simply planted his lips and began ravishing her. She cried out and his fingers slipped a centimeter into her jeans.

They weren't even fully inside of her jeans. His thumb was still outside, holding her in place as he began to slowly drag his fingers across the bare skin.

“Do you want this?” Lance asked, his fingers teasing circles at her waist. “Do you want me to keep going?”

She moaned at his words and actions, as he began to push his covered hard on against her covered core. Clothed or not, it made her dizzy and she began moaning out.

“Or do I stay like this? Keep touching you fully clothed because I don't deserve to see you after what I did?” Lance moved faster, his hips grinding against hers. The pressure was building up in her core.

It was probably best to stop this right now. With the way that he messed her up not even a week ago and will probably do it again, she shouldn't be rewarding his cowardly actions with the pleasures her body was giving hin.

He's _using_ her. He's using her body for his own and she's doing the same back. She can't help but bite down on his shoulder as he put a hand on her ass to thrust faster.

They're going to regret this as soon as it's done but it doesn't matter because she's feeling so good right now and he's making her feel amazing. His touch is completely undoing her.

Lance started whispering sweet nothings into her ear, but Pidge wasn't paying attention. She focused on what was between her legs at the moment, seeing stars as he tried his best to get her with clothes on.

In the back of her mind, she was thinking about how horrible this was. That he had hurt her, yet she ignored it because even though she doesn't like him very much in the moment, she likes the way that he's looking at her.

The way he's watching her with such intensity in his eyes make her legs turn to jelly. She has to tighten her ankles around him because if not, she'd let go of him. Her legs are shaking as if he had really been rocking her.  

It's just the lust that's making her hyper aware of everything. To the cold desk that she's sitting on to the softness of his boxers. She could feel how his rough hands were digging into her waist and something was dripping down her leg. The pinching of her bra was something that she needed removed immediately.

“Fuck, Lance,” she moaned, her nails digging crescent moons into his shirtless back.

He laughed against her, finding her lips to kiss again. “C'mon, Katie. That's not what I want to hear you say. Speak, hermosa. Say what I want you to say.”

“Keep going, Lance, _please_ ,” she yelled, her real name being used making her whimper. She knew that speaking spanish was one of his weaknesses. “Por favor.”

Apparently that's what Lance wanted to hear since he unbuttoned her jeans and began to work as he dropped to his knees in front of her and then there was a knock at the door.

Pidge barley registered Lance actually _shoving her off the desk_ as they both scrambled, her trying to find her discarded shirt.

It wasn't until she was fully clothed again that she realized the extent of what they had just done. For one, this means that the drug hadn't fully worn off yet. So that's one discovery. Another is that her and Lance are totally and utterly _fucked._

“Lance, I-” she tried.

“Shh,” Lance said. “This doesn't leave this room. We'll talk about it after we get rid of Shiro. Or Allura. Or whoever else could be behind the door.”

Pidge nodded, and opened her door. She was face to face with Shiro. Of course it had to be Shiro. “What's up?” She casually greeted.

“I came to tell you that Lance was back,” Shiro rubbed his temples with two fingers as he looked behind her and saw Lance standing behind her. “I mean, I can see that he came and sought you out first. But, before anything, Keith came back with some valuable information regarding what's happening with Ryner. I'll give you five doboshes.” With that, he closed the door.

Immediately, Pidge turned to Lance. “Look, I'm not saying that that was completely meaningless. But, Coran gave me a drug that was designed to tear people apart and to do everything on impulse. That's probably why we went as far as we did. Just thought you should probably know that.”

Lance nodded his head, taking in all the information. Finally, he spoke, “I'm sorry. I was hurt and dazed after the argument. I hate fighting with you. I realized we needed some kind of break from each other before we do something we can't come back from. I shouldn't have gone that abruptly, though.”

Pidge exhaled. She wouldn't confess yet. Not when she's unpredictable, even though every bone in her body was screaming at her to tell him what she felt. “I can't really speak because of the drug, but as soon as it wears off, we're continuing this conversation.”

Lance chuckled. “Don't worry. I'll wait for you.”

Her heart just about melted as she opened her door and they began to walk to the main room. She assumed that's where Shiro and everyone else would be. She now knew what they felt for each other, even though Pidge couldn't exactly get it out. But for right now, that's enough.

They walked into the room, but they were the last ones there. Lance gave her a small smile as they stood side by side, waiting for Keith to start talking. He stood tall in his Marmora suit that Allura was definitely ogling.

Leave it to girls to think about how hot their crushes are while they're about to get crucial information.

“Basically,” Keith started as soon as everyone was in the room. “Ryner and everyone else has been possessed by Zarkon and company, and that's why we saw some visions.” He glanced at her. “Even some that we probably weren't even supposed to see. Now, I heard word of someone else actually being involved in the scheme. Some alien girls have actually been sending out a couple of the visions.”

“So what are we going to do?” Shiro asked.

“Here's the interesting part,” Keith began. “These aliens have actually made a business out of this. People and aliens can go and buy their services, and in exchange, they will plant either weird visions or possession.”

“So these girls have been working for Zarkon?” Allura asked for confirmation. “That, and they're also responsible for most of the things going on?”

“Correct,” Keith confirmed. “Now, I was thinking that we send one of us to ‘purchase' something with everyone else for backup. Then, we kick ass and go from there.”

Immediately, Shiro already raised his hand to volunteer. But so did Lance, so they were left awkwardly staring at each other. Pidge cleared her throat, also raising her hand. “No offense to either of you, but you're both pretty scary. And intimidating and can very easily be perceived as a threat.”

“We're not sending you,” Lance grumbled. “If that's what you're suggesting. It's too risky. They're expecting someone big to buy the type of thing they're selling. You're tiny, and they'll probably attack her.”

“I've had it up to here with your bullshit, Lance.” At this point, he has to know that it's the drug talking and not her. If he doesn't, then she feels pretty god awful about something that she doesn't have control over. “You're constantly putting me down when I want to do something. I never say anything when you volunteer for a mission, as much as I hate it.” She turned on her heel and started walking out. “Do whatever you guys want since I guess I don't have a say. Tell me what you need me to do later.”

As much as Pidge wanted to stay and help formulate a plan, she couldn't. Her feet carried her away. She has _got_ to find some kind of remedy for this stupid drug because it's definitely going to tear apart a couple of her friendships.

“I didn't mean it like that!” Lance yelled, but she ignored it. She was forced to ignore it. She really did have no say in what she did. There was something entirely new in her body that made her do anything she did and didn't want.

She can only imagine how confusing this had to be for Lance. They kiss, he leaves, he blows up, they make out, Pidge blows up at him, he leaves, they make out again, she tells him about the drug, and she blows up once more.

The effects of this drug are working perfectly, and she has to give props to the creator for that. The first kiss had been when she was still completely conscious of her decisions. There's no denying that was a kiss she wanted.

Once she had made it back to her room and went over possible solutions for this drug, her buzzer rang. “Pidge?” It was Shiro. “I don't know what the hell is going on with you and Lance, but we'll give you space for now. We're backup to Lance. We leave in a varga.”

She didn't respond, feeling only anger. Keith never told her this thing can control emotions. Only actions. Is it supposed to do this?

*

“Just go and explain what happened,” Pidge mumbled to herself as she walked to the red lion. “It was the drug and you had no control over anything you said.”

The second she approached the red lion, its doors opened for her. She had to remember to include thanking Red while she gave her explanation to Lance. It was at least some kind of human decency.

“Lance?” Pidge called out. They still had thirty doboshes until departure, so she had plenty of time to get everything out. “Look, I really need to talk to you.” She walked to the pilot's seat and didn't see him still, so she looked out the window.

“Same,” Lance said as he approached her, coming from the hanger. “I wanted to say I'm sorry. The last thing I wanted to do is make you feel like you had no say in what you want. That's the last thing I'd ever want you to feel: forced into anything. I'm really sorry it took that to make me realize how you felt.”

“No, I should be the one apologizing,” Pidge shook her head. “I can't control any of my actions or words,” she ran a hand through her hair and put her hands on the pilot sear. “I really _don't_ have any kind of say in anything and it really fucking sucks. I didn't even willingly give up control.”

She didn't understand why that particular sentence had managed to make Lance hard. He crossed one leg over the other to hide it from her, but she'd already seen it. She made her way to him.

Lance started blushing once she smiled knowingly at him. “Sorry, I don't know what happened. Just kinda… popped up. Don't worry, I'll deal with it.”

He began to walk away, already starting her mind to have some particular thoughts about how he would take care of his boner. She knew he couldn't resist her. So, she shrugged and sat down at the pilot's seat, eyes closed. “Okay, whatever you want.”

“Fuck,” Lance muttered. “You know you're way too beautiful for me to resist, right?”

Pidge chuckled. She hadn't realized how much arousal was flaring through her body. Sure, she couldn't exactly say no to anything, but it wasn't like she didn't want this. Lance is exactly what she wanted ever since they had seen that stupid vision.

Wait…

“Did you realize that what happened earlier is the future thingy we saw?” Pidge asked. Realization dawned on him as well. They both took one look at each other and started laughing.

It wasn't actual humor that seemed so funny in this situation. It was the irony. She found it absolutely hilarious how their future had already played out. She would've continued to laugh if she hadn't took a glance at Lance's eyes.

Pupils dilated. Because he wanted this. Because he wanted _her._ Pidge quickly shut up and pulled him down by the collar of his shirt in a kiss that shut the both of them up.

Unfortunately, Lance's actions were controllable and he pulled away after about fifteen seconds. “I want this, don't get me wrong. But, I don't want to do this while you're not in the right state of mind. I'm not exactly sure you can say no, so I'd rather we wait until you can form a coherent thought.”

Pidge giggled. “Lance, that's the opposite of what I want. I may not be able to physically say no, but by god do I want this. And I could tell from that raging boner that you clearly want this too. When you're done with me, I don't want to be able to form any coherent thoughts.”

His eyes blew open wide at her bold words. All courtesy of the stupid drug. “You wouldn't be able to be in control,” Lance reminded.

“Who said I wanted to?” Pidge raised an eyebrow. She would've thought that from earlier, he would know which one of them had already asserted dominance.

“And you're sure you want this?” Lance asked. “I'm not asking the drug. I'm asking you, Pidge. I want to make sure I'm getting your full consent and all that. Because once we start, I know I'm not going to be able to stop.”

Pidge appreciated the concern. She really did. But right now, all she could think was how good it would feel to have Lance on top of her and kissing her breathless. It was the drug's thoughts, but it was what she wanted. She kissed him again, making sure her intent was one hundred percent clear.

Lance pulled away from her mouth to begin kissing her jaw with care. He moved slow, taking in every small gasp and whimper she made. He had the audacity to _chuckle_ when he bit her in her sensitive spot on her neck.

“I've been so long without your body…” Lance started as his lips started trailing down. He sat in front of her. He teased the hem of her shirt and took it off in one shift motion that made Pidge breathless. She sighed as he dipped his tongue in her navel. “I want to taste you, now.”

“No one is stopping you..” Pidge breathed out as he began massaging her thighs. She arched her back when he touched her covered core, and he took the opportunity to pull her jeans off. He took his own shirt and flung it across the lion once it was off.

“Where's your bayard?” Lance asked.

She was startled by the question. “Um,” she pulled it out. “Here.” It transformed into the grappling hook when Lance held out his hand, waiting for her to give it to him. She handed it off, confused by his intentions.

The confusion didn't last long as Lance gingerly took her wrist and tied them together with the bayard. When Pidge raised an eyebrow at him, he blushed. “I just need to make sure that you're not getting away from me again.”

“The former green paladin just rolled into the grave,” Pidge commented, a weak laugh as Lance kissed the inside of her thighs. She gripped the armrest of the seat and squirmed when Lance slid her underwear off.

The Great and Mighty Katie Holt, naked in the red lion's pilot seat.

She was so distracted by the sheer thought of the bayard that the first press of Lance's tongue had her squirming. It didn't even feel like anything yet, but she knew he could absolutely ruin her if he wanted to.

It wasn't until Lance completely pressed his tongue into her that she felt it. She felt _it._ Something so fantastic spread through her body and she barely registered letting out a moan when he continued lapping at her.

“Lance..” She moaned, unable to do much with her tied up hands. She dug her heels into his back.

“Twenty doboshes until launch, Lance,” Shiro's voice rang through the lion. “Just make sure you're ready by then.”

“Guess we'll make this quick,” Lance hurriedly continued lapping at her as his hands went up and down her thighs. “That is, if you still want to do this.”

She groaned and pushed his head back in with her heels. Pidge could barely register whatever the fuck he was doing to her. The alternations between harsh sucks and slow licks had her gasping for air. One of his hands was teasing around her clit, never quite touching. And that had her letting out noises she never imagined she could make.

It was making eye contact that messed her up. His pupils were dilated and taking a one second glance at him would have anyone knowing he's focused on ruining her. He wants to make her a mess. He wants her shaking and quivering in the tied up bayard.

When Lance wrapped his lips around her clit, it was a feeling that she had never felt before.

Like every ounce of pleasure in her body was poured into this one moment. Yeah, she's a teenager and has touched herself before, but this wasn't like anything she'd ever brought herself to. No, this was completely different.

This had her toes clenching, arms raised above her head, back arched, and embarrassing noises coming out of her.

Immediately, they heard a knock at the lion. “Lance, you decent?” Shiro yelled.

“Shit,” Pidge grabbed her clothes and ducked behind the first wall she could find that Shiro wouldn't be able to see. What the hell was she thinking? That was amazing, don't get her wrong. Her legs were shaking as she attempted to hide.

But that definitely blew a fine hole in her and Lance's weird friendship they have going on.

This is a drug that was designed to keep her and her team separated. She should've stayed away after the first time around! But as Pidge tried tying off her bayard's cord, ignoring Shiro and Lance's conversation while getting dressed, she prayed that they'd still be okay.

She didn't stick around for anything. She walked out the lion without a second thought. She didn't regret it, no. But she did feel that they probably should've talked about what happened first before almost having full blown sex.

They almost had sex in the red lion while she was tied up with the green paladin's bayward.

Allura would be appalled.

*

“You've seemed distracted since we came on this mission,” Keith noticed. “Look, we're really sorry if you felt belittled. We know you're strong. We're just worried considering we accidentally almost got you killed last time.”

“Plus I'm still injected with that stupid drug,” Pidge grumbled from their hiding spot behind a bush. They were watching the purchase go down between Lance and the alien women. Just looking at him made her want to jump him, but every bone in her body worked to stop it. “Maybe ruined me and Lance, who knows.”

Keith sighed. “I'm sorry. I should've realized that something wasn't right about it. Hey, do me a favor. Don't mention to Lance that I was the one who gave you the drug because he will actually beat me up. Thanks.”

She turned her attention back to Lance and the buy. At this point, they know where each other stand on their feelings. But, neither of them had said anything outright yet. Somehow, that made it a thousand times more real.

“I'm Ezor,” one of the women introduced. She pointed to the alien next to her. “This is my partner, Zethrid.”

“Great,” Lance smiled at them. “I'm interested in buying one of your visions for other people.”

“Really?” Zethrid raised an eyebrow. “Because, _paladin,”_ Lance immediately made a face of panic. “Someone on your ship stole something that belonged to us. A special herb. Great for making this one weapon. Except, we can't show you because we don't possess the herb. Now, which one of your teammates stole it?”

Lance chuckled nervously. “What exactly does this weapon do?”

“It's designed as a torture method, in a way,” Ezor explained. “It's supposed to allow the person to do whatever they want, whenever we allow it. We usually just let them wander around until they get themselves killed. Or, we control it.”

Pidge exchanged glances with Keith. Oh shit. This was not good. It may not be her weapon, but what if it's her weapon that they're describing? The thing that's been forced into her? This can't be good, especially when she felt the urged to turn herself in.

“It can't be you,” Keith said, although it sounded like he was trying to convince them rather than actually say it. “Because if Coran really is being mind controlled, it would make no sense for him to have to steal any kind of herbs.”

“We don't know how this thing works,” Pidge reminded. “Let's not get too ahead of ourselves, or excited.”

Though there was a strange feeling of wanting to reveal herself. She wanted to tell everybody how she stole the herbs because she hated them so much, no matter how much of a lie that was. It's what she wanted to say.

“Why don't we see which one of your friends is the one with our weapon in their body,” Ezor sneered, sounding confident.

Pidge didn't even feel herself standing up and walking besides Lance. She felt Keith trying to push her shoulder back down, but besides that, there was no other pull. The only thing was her and wanting to show everyone who she is.

“What are you doing?” Lance whispered to her with wide eyes.

Zethrid chuckled. “Ah, so the tiny one _did_ end up taking the drug. I had to double check. I don't exactly trust the other bloke with everything. Well, I'd bet half my fleet that everyone has a soft spot for the small green one. Take her.”

The _second_ Ezor moved a muscle, Lance pounced. He was on top of her, growling and pointing his bayard in her face. Meanwhile, the other paladins joined in the fight, trying to keep Pidge back.

But she didn't listen.

She couldn't. Even if it were voluntary, Zethrid didn't take it as that. She grabbed Pidge's wrist, most noticable a crack accompanied by it. She pulled Pidge next to her, expertly swinging at the paladins with one hand.

Beside her, Pidge cried out in pain. Everytime Zethrid moved, she jerked her wrist. It was the small whimpers that got Lance's attention. He shoved Ezor once to the ground and she was gone. He was now one hundred percent focused on her.

“Pidge!” Lance yelled. He tried grabbing her other hand, but the strain of her wrist had her reflexes kick in as she kicked him. The pain almost made her crumble, but Keith lightly helping her stand eased it.

Apparently Zethrid didn't notice the ex-paladin because she turned to face Pidge and made a noise of surprise. She took out a blaster and took a clean shot at Allura's arm. The beam did hit her, making the princess fall to the floor, gripping her left arm.

Allura made Keith temporarily forget that Pidge had a broken wrist or something because once he let her to to kneel next to Allura, Pidge fell again. Except this time, no one noticed her.

“Get her on the ship,” Zethrid told Ezor. Ezor nodded, and took Pidge's broken wrist roughly. She let a pathetic whimper leave her mouth, once again getting the attention of Lance. How does he always seem to hear her cries?

“Katie!” Lance screamed. He charged the aliens, holding his hand out to reach for her.

Pidge attempted to reach out as well, but their fingertips barely touched when Zethrid jerked her back. Pidge barely contained her cry when she felt her wrist screw up in excruciating pain.

“No, please come back,” Lance tried, everyone else tried, running after the ship that Zethrid and Ezor were putting her on. “Katie, I love you now _please.”_ They tried blasting and doing anything they could to get the ship out of the air, all to no use.

Pidge wanted to cry.

She didn't only want to cry. She wanted to kick and scream and yell and curse at everybody who even tried to breathe the same oxygen as she did. But she couldn't do it. She couldn't really do much without the drug allowing her to do it.

“Hey, green paladin,” Ezor greeted. “Me and Zethrid have so much fun stuff coming up when we arrive at Lotor's place. Excited?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all...
> 
> writers block got me bad. like b a d. like really really bad. i had no inspiration with this chapter at all. you can literally see when i get lazy oof. majoirty of this is just rewrites. i wrote this thing so many times i finally just stuck with this one.
> 
> like guys i didn't even wanna publish this i feel like everything was just so rushed. i still don't wanna publish it but here ya go 🤷 sorry 
> 
> but worry not, friends. next chapter im already excited about. this one just kinda slumped me, ya know??
> 
> bye bye


	9. the walls get painted anyways

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ⚠️ Violence and abuse mentions ⚠️

“This is the one?” Pidge heard someone ask. It was definitely a male. “The one who blatantly disrespected the new leader of the universe?”

_ Pfft, you wish,  _ Pidge thought. She rolled her eyes, even if no could see under the blindfold that had been put on her. She only wishes that her friends could've seen where she'd gone. Because she knows they have absolutely no idea of her whereabouts.

“This is the one,” Ezor said.

“Take off the blindfold,” the man instructed. “I want her to see who she has to listen to.”

Pidge felt someone take off the blindfold roughly, catching little pieces of her hair. It hurt, but she didn't flinch. Flinching would make it appear that she's weak, and that's not her. This is a situation to look strong. To look like a paladin of Voltron. Her wrist screamed from the sudden movement.

She was immediately met by brick walls on three sides, and bars on one. A cell. She slowly made eye contact with everyone in the room. There was Ezor and Zethrid, obviously, but also someone she didn't know. He had white, long hair that could rival even the best movie stars she remembered from Earth.

“I would like you to know who I am,” the man announced. “I am Prince Lotor. My father is Zarkon but worry not, we'll overthrow him soon enough. I'll be the newest leader pretty quickly. I could probably get some funding to start my new universe already. Little ransom to your teammates here, some selling you to Unilu there…”

Pidge, honest to god,  _ hissed.  _ Then again she doesn't really have much control over majority of her actions or words so hey that's not exactly her fault. Lotor only chuckled at her childish antics.

“I've been told you have something that belongs to me,” Lotor smiled. “Ezor, inject her. I want it back.”

The tip of something solid and metal pressed into her arm. She winced in pain, regretting trying to act tough. Her wrist, already broken, seemed like it was trying to break itzeld again. She looked down at her arm and noticed that it was, in fact, a needle in her. The thickness and length made her nervous, even though she had already felt it.

Everything that happened afterward was unreal. The amount of pain that flared throughout her body was too much. She withered on the floor, cries of pain making it almost impossible for her to hear Lotor's chuckles. Almost.

A thousand knives felt like they were entering her sides. Hammers were slamming down on her stomach. Every nerve was on fire. Ezor took the needle out. Pidge continued to feel the pain for about five more seconds. Her throat hurt from the yelling.

When everything had subsided, she glared at the three. They all had smiles on their faces. As if the fact that they had a paladin of Voltron screaming and struggling on the floor of their castle an achievement. Then again, Lotor is the son of Zarkon. He probably  _ is  _ proud.

After about two seconds of resting, she felt it again. Thousands of pins in her head as the drug removed itself. Seriously,  _ this  _ was the only way for it to be removed? Ezor has mentioned that the drug was for torture methods, so that's probably why it hurt so bad.

The pain subsided for only a fraction of a second before it started again. This one only lasted for ten seconds before finally clearing. Everytime Pidge yelled, Lotor chuckled. He found it funny that she was in pain.

On the (only) bright side, Pidge did feel a huge relief. It was as if a weight had been lifted from her head and she could actually think clearly. She was finally in control of her actions again. She didn't have to worry about doing something that she would regret.  

Pidge, with her new way of thinking and seeing, she took a good look at everybody. Ezor and Zethrid look like regular alien girls. But it's Lotor that shocked her. For some reason, she remembered what Allura had described in her dream vision. A man with white hair.

He's standing in front of her. And he's important for some reason.

Yet, she chuckled. Yes, it was weak and it made her hurt from the previous pain, but she still managed the weak laugh. She had to prove that she had some kind of dominance to her. They can't think they have the upper hand. Not yet. The other three in the room looked at her with great appreciation.

“Good job, girls,” Lotor congratulated. “It looks like you found me someone worth my time. Someone who could potentially put up a good fight. Oh, what fun this will be!”

“In your dreams,” Pidge croaked. “Don't even think about touching me. I know the rest of the Paladins will come sooner or later. We have allies as well. They could be on the lookout. But for now, I think I will personally kick your ass. Be honored.”

The  _ second  _ she stood up, a foot was met to her abdomen. It knocked the wind out of her as she stumbled backwards, falling down again. She tried catching herself on her broken wrist, only to let out a whimper when pain flared up her arm. She leaned against one of the brick walls to support herself. Should she be this winded?

Lotor chuckled again. “Silly paladin. Fighting is for the big boys. Don't worry. I'm sure the rest of your team will be here soon enough. I collect my ransom price for you. Then I'll capture them all and publicly execute you all. I overthrow my father and I'm the new king of the universe.”

“Funny,” Pidge tried to grin, but it didn't come out as one. Her arm hurt too had. “There's a reason  _ we're  _ called the  _ Defenders  _ of the universe. That's to stop assholes like you. Don't worry. It shouldn't be too difficult. What's two girls and one guy with amazing hair?”

“You forgot,” Ezor grabbed her broken wrist. “That we have the upper  _ hand.” _

Ezor twisted her wrist in a weird direction, flinging her head-first into the metal bars parallel from the wall she was leaning against. And that's when Pidge straight up blacked out from the pain.

*

When Pidge woke up, the first thing she noticed was that she had been chained up. Her hands were in handcuffs so tight they ached. The cuffs were bound on a chain connected to the wall. If she looked straight, she would see the bars of the cell. Her wrist was crying in pain.

The next thing she saw was that she had been stripped down to her sports bra and pair of athletic shorts she always wore under her paladin armour. She noticed a new bruise decorating her stomach. Probably from the kick Lotor gave her.

She leaned her head against the brick wall. Well, if heartbreak and despair didn't kill her, then this definitely would! So much time acting like something as petty as  _ Lance  _ could kill her. How stupid she had acted…

Oh god… Lance! How are the rest of her team doing? Did they make it out alive? Well, the only other people there besides them were Ezor and Zethrid, so they would've had to have come out unscratched. They have to be fine. They can't be hurt because of her actions that happened while she was being controlled.

This whole time, Lance didn't want to send her on the mission because he was scared of something like this happening. Something like her capture. And that turned out to be exactly what happened, despite the fact that they didn't even let her be the buyer.

Everyone probably feels like extra precautions should've been taken into place. Shiro probably blames himself. He's the one who assigned roles, and she ended up kidnapped. He puts too much responsibility on himself.

Not only does Shiro get protective of her (because of some stupid promise he made to Matt), but Lance too. He's been overprotective for about the entirety of knowing him. Even back at the Garrison, he would always save her from getting into trouble. He tried to protect her, and now he probably feels like he failed.

Oh god… She knows how the Galra do things around here. She knows there's a possibility of her death. She never got to say goodbye to anyone else… This is unfair. In the event of her death, she just hopes they can find somebody else to pilot the green lion.

When she heard a rattling noise against the bars, her head peaked up. She struggled uselessly against the cuffs. Her wrist ached, and she knew she was only doing further damage by trying to struggle. It didn't work, and she was about to cry.

“Don't get up,” Lotor called out to her. “It'll make matters worse. I was just checking in to see if you were up yet. I wanted to talk with you about your mission to restore peace to the galaxy. I'm intrigued by your methods.”

“You're intrigued by the methods?” Pidge raised an eyebrow. She hasn't known Lotor for very long, but she does know that he doesn't show any mercy. Anybody who's planning to overthrow Zarkon doesn't have an inch of humanity. Then again, this is Zarkon's heir. That should be expected.

“I would be lying if I said you didn't intrigue me either…” Lotor said with a suggestive look. “I am quite interested in you as well. You're small, petite. Cute. I'm also curious as to how the human female works. I've never seen another human girl. I want to know how you terrans work. That is, if you would have me.”

Hold the fuck up.

Is Zarkon's son really  _ flirting  _ with her? Is he really looking for something else that  _ wasn't  _ flirting? Why is he asking for permission in the first place? Okay, no. This won't do. “I'm going to decline your offer politely.”

Lotor shrugged. “Fair enough. Now, may I proceed with my questioning?”

“Why are you asking?” Pidge asked, genuinely confused.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Lotor chuckled. “I'm not asking for you.”

With that (very) confusing statement, Lotor cleared his throat. “How exactly do you get your answers if you don't use violence? I've heard from others who have encountered you that you never even threaten. How?”

Pidge didn't exactly want to tell him the secrets the paladins had, so she stayed quiet. Lotor chuckled again. “Oh, come on. Don't get shy on me now. I know you're the smartest of your team. You have all the answers I'm looking for. Just tell me.”

“You'd be pretty fucking surprised at the amount of planets that are willing to cooperate when you don't have the other end of a gun pointed at their face,” Pidge answered. She saw Lotor's subtle move towards her. She also saw something shiny up his sleeve.

“Are you insulting my own methods?” Lotor had the audacity to look shocked. “Now, don't be getting too bold. I can still kill you with a flick of my hand. I underestimated you at first. You seem witty. But your fighting is still unknown to me, as is mine to you. Don't pick a fight.”

What she wanted to say was he can take that flick of his hand and shove it up his ass. Luckily, the drug had been painfully removed from her system, so she didn't say that out loud and get herself killed. It's moments like these when she realizes to the extent how dangerous that thing could be.

“Now, I have another question,” Lotor sat crossed legged in front of her, the shiny thing peeping up his sleeve. “I've heard from an unknown source that one of your teammates had a vision about me. I would like to know exactly who it was.”

Shit. That's Allura. Who could've possibly tipped him off about that? If they considered Coran using the drug on her as stealing, then there's no way it was him. It had to have been someone else. And that's what scared her.

“Oh?” Lotor raised an eyebrow. “Not gonna tell me, eh? Don't worry, I'll make sure no killing happens until your televised execution. Now, you're going to tell me exactly who on that ship of yours had a vision about me, or else you're the one that's going to get hurt.”

No. No, Allura is  _ not  _ getting captured because Pidge got kidnapped. That's not what's going to happen, so she stayed silent. Better it her than Allura. Better it her than anybody else. She'll take the fall so nobody else is going to have to.

Unfortunately, Lotor didn't see her brave deminar as bravely. “Such a coward. So scared to talk. Maybe I could help jog your memory. You don't seem to have any trouble remember, though, do you? Just a coward. Great defender of the universe isn't looking great anymore.”

Saying she wasn't ‘going to look great' anymore was a severe understatement from what Lotor had said. Something had hit her in the eye with the same amount of force as a truckload of bricks. She cried out, trying to reach for her eye as a reflex, but doing no good. Her wrists protested any sudden movement.

She hadn't noticed Zethrid lurking in the shadows. The alien had been the one to hit her with the hilt of her blaster. She grinned with triumph, putting her blaster back in its holder.

Pidge had the audacity to still act brave. She met Lotor's eyes and clicked her tongue. “You really think a punch like that can really take me out? Please. You have no idea the kinds of things I've dealt with. I would be dead right now if a solid punch was supposed to knock me out or something.”

For a split second, Lotor's smirk wiped off his face. Then, that blank face was replaced by a sinister smile. “You really think I'd want you unconscious right now? My only goal is to get the answers I want. Now, I can't have you dying in your sleep before I get to know everything I want to know, right?”

“So basically, you're going to throttle me until I give you everything you want?” Pidge summarized. “Well, in that case, you guys suck at being villains. C'mon, no wanting to destroy me and my friends as soon as possible? You want  _ information  _ first? God, you sound like me.”

“Shut up,” Lotor commanded. “You are a child. You do not know what the world holds-”

“I'm a child, sure,” Pidge shrugged as best she could in the shackles. “But, I'm also a child  _ soldier.  _ I fight a war. Come back to me when you're the one struggling to stay alive at fifteen years old.”

“You do not know of my struggles!” Lotor yelled, her eardrums nearly blasting off. “You do not know of my early years with my father! I am on the run right now because I attempted to kidnap my mother's  _ cat!  _ Once we kill you, my father will be overthrown and I will take over as the rightful ruler! Do not challenge me. I've been abused since I was a young child. Hurt her.”

She didn't understand at first what ‘hurt her' was going to mean, but quickly understood when her arm was slashed open. Zethrid had taken a dagger and cut her on the same arm as her broken wrist. Pidge held in a cry, but did wince.

Nothing but a paper cut. A big one, nonetheless, but a cut. She looked at her arm and noticed that the cut wasn't even that huge. Not a big deal. All she had to do was suck up a couple more scratches and her friends would be here in no time.

Or at least, that  _ was  _ Pidge's mindset. The silver in Lotor's sleeve turned out to be a blade that he handed off to Zethrid. She took the knife, swiping an even bigger cut that went from her shoulder to her bicep. She whimpered this time, ashamed of the pathetic noises coming out of her.

“The paladin has a weakness,” Lotor observed off of like, zero evidence. “Exploit it. Use it against her. I don't want her leaving. I don't want her dying. Knock her out if she won't answer you, but keep waking her up. Please, I don't feel like killing her privately. We don't even have the rest of her friends yet. I'll alert you when the lions have arrived.”

_ Don't come,  _ Pidge wanted to tell her friends.  _ Please, for the love of god, don't come. Don't come. Please, don't come. You will not die because I got captured. _

Alas, she knew that every single one of those pilots were way too heroic for their own good. Each one of them were going to want to save her, life be damned. Sacrificing for each other was common. In fact, she would've preferred to keep everyone away and let her suffer to herself.

Zethrid plunged Lotor's blade into her abdomen, and this time, Pidge couldn't stop the yell. It felt like a thousand tiny pins were entering her body at once, all in the same spot. Her whole stomach section of her body protested the movement when Zethrid slightly moved the knife.

“So this is how I make you scream,” Zethrid pulled out the knife to examine it. “Very nice indeed. All I had to do was put a hole in your body.” She put the blade back into the hole she had just previously made, making Pidge scream again.

Somehow, the second stab had felt a hundred times worse. Maybe because that spot had already been weakened, but she was now seeing black dots dote her vision. Consciousness was slipping. Her mouth tasted of metal. She felt so tired…

“The place that I got you is a special one,” Zethrid clicked her tongue. “We studied human pain receptors for the moment we killed you. We discovered this particular spot won't kill you. Although, we've never found anything about stabbing it twice. This is a nice… experiment. Now, want to tell me what Lotor wants to know? Or are we going to find out what happens after three stabs?”

Pidge gritted her teeth, pain flaring through her whole body. Zethrid ran her fingers along the cut, and she screamed out again. Her body felt like it was shutting down. Her eyes were slowly closing. This was all too overwhelming.

Ezor ran into the cell, a huge grin on her face. “They're here,” her eyes trained on Pidge. “May I say, your friends are quite tedious. Determined. It's cute that they think they can win.”

Zethrid stood up. “Sorry, paladin. Duty calls. I hope you didn't lose too much blood. I imagine Lotor wouldn't be too happy, right? We don't want that. Now do we?” With that, they both ran out the room, but not without another cackle.

And Pidge let the tears freely fall.

*

Thirty seconds.

Pidge counted to thirty in her head to attempt to keep her mind off of the pain. It took thirty seconds before she heard someone screaming her nickname and real name. A mix of Pidges and Katies filled her ears. She couldn't have been bothered to answer back.

“Pidge! Katie, where the fuck are you!? Please, tell me where you are! Damn it!”

She recognized the voice as Lance, but Pidge couldn't move. Her breathing had gone labored, which was probably not a good sign. She let out a whimper to let him know that she was here. She couldn't even talk. The taste of metallic in her mouth was too strong.

Footsteps were running towards her. She groaned inside of her head, not happy with whatever Zethrid had prepared for her next. But, the pleasant surprise of Lance showing up on the outside of her cell was enough to make her sob with relief.

“Katie!” Lance yelled, a grin splitting his face in half. He blasted the lock on the cell with his blaster and stepped inside. His smile quickly fell off his face when he saw the bloody hole on her body. He covered his mouth with a gasp. He gripped his blaster until his knuckles turned white, anger rippling his expression.

“Oh god…” Pidge mumbled, her head moving to the side. Lance rushed forward before she can completely smack herself, working at the handcuffs. She let out the most pathetic whimper she's made this whole time when he accidentally moved her wrist too hard.

On the bright side, he managed to rip the handcuffs off. Maybe being on the run from your evil father didn't give Lotor enough funding to buy cuffs strong enough to hold anybody else who didn't have a broken wrist. Or maybe Lance was just that angry that he tore through the cuffs with his bare hands as if they were paper.

The flip side meant that the pain was finally becoming too much for her to handle. Him moving her wrist around too much was the final straw. Lance swore under his breath and started to apologize profoundly. “Shit, I didn't know you were hurt in other places. I am so sorry. I didn't know. Katie, I am so sorry…”

Pidge didn't even listen to the rest of his apology. She was slowly, but surely, losing majority of the feeling in her body. Only Lance cradling her dying body felt like anything. The only thing she wanted was to sleep. Damn, was she tired…

“Don't fucking go to sleep on me,” Lance scooped her up easily into a bridal carry. She winced when her wrist was moved from its position. Her bone was  _ shattered.  _ Her abdomen has a  _ hole  _ in it. She doesn't think she's going to make it. “Stay awake. Don't worry. We'll get you to a healing pod soon enough, hermosa.”

She almost shrieked when she looked down and saw the pool of blood. She took her good hand and pressed down on the hole; a half assed attempt at stopping the bleeding. She started crying even more as soon as the pain flushed up her body.

At this point, she felt water droplets on her face. She didn't know if it was raining or something, especially since they were indoors. Maybe she was just bleeding from her head and she hadn't noticed it. One quick glance up showed her that Lance was crying, his tears showering her face.

“Just hold on for a little longer,” Lance reassured. “Hunk! Keith! Anyone else who's at the castle, just prepare a healing pod! Pidge is really badly injured! Just fucking hurry!”

“Lance, I'm heading your way,” she heard Shiro say through the muffled intercom in Lance’s helmet. She didn't have her helmet at all. Or her armour. Or pants and a shirt for that matter. She had forgotten through everything that she was practically naked. Everything was on fire.

“Shiro, please hurry!” Lance yelled. “She's not doing too well. She has a gaping hole in her stomach. So please,  _ please,  _ hurry!”

“Lance,” Pidge grabbed his sleeve, turning his attention back to her as he ran throughout the building. She barely registered the amount of cells in this place. “Lance… I.. I don't know how much… I can go on for.”

“Don't say that,” Lance's bottom lip trembled, and she hated that he was hurting. “We're going to make it back to the castle and we're going to be together again. Just please don't go to sleep. Whatever you do,  _ don't sleep.” _

“I'm tired,” she croaked. “Lance, I've… I've never been… this tired… different… I.. I don't…”

“No no no,” he started full on sprinting, still being cautious about her wrist. “Katie, don't go to sleep. Trust me, you don't want to sleep. I can't lose you. I don't know what I'll do if you die right now. Please, please don't sleep. I need you here, hermosa. Just stay awake.”

“Lance…” Pidge leaned up as much as she could and stroked his cheek with her thumb. Might as well make an impact on someone's life before she dies, right? Besides, she waited too long to tell him how she felt. Now, she's going to die without telling him everything she needed to get out. “Best friend… More…”

“More?” Lance questioned, not even out of breath from running so much. “What do you want more of?”

“You…” Pidge whimpered when he started holding her tighter. “Best friends… I want more…”

“We're going to be more,” Lance promised, taking complicated and confusing twist and turns throughout the building. “Just stay awake and I can one hundred percent tell you we'll be more than best friends. Just stay awake. That's all you need to do.”

“Don't think so…” Pidge coughed, red staining the white of his suit. He let out a disgruntled sob. “Lotor… Zarkon's son… Kill us…”

“Lotor is not an issue,” Lance finally managed to make it outside the building, an explosion in the distance roaring. “I'll make sure him and whoever was involved in this pay for it. I'll never let him hurt you again.”

“He's strong… Kicked me…” Pidge looked to the side, seeing Shiro battle Ezor and Zethrid. Lotor was staring Allura down, and she wasn't moving. Her bayard wasn't even activated. They both stared at each other, neither moving.

“He kicked you?” Lance asked, a slight growl in the way he talked. He was seriously gritting his teeth, and she was getting worried for his orthodontist.

Pidge tried to focus on the bright fire blazing around them instead of the pressure from her pressing against her abdomen and her wrist. Her hands weren't the cleanest, so maybe touching her cut wasn't the best idea. She was way too damn tired to even care at this point.

She suddenly had a wave of fear flash through her. She weakly tried getting his attention. “Don't leave… Not… Again… Happen once… Please…”

“I'm not sure anyone can tell you what the hell I was thinking when I went with Keith,” Lance was running around like a chicken without a head. Maybe searching for something. “I won't leave you again. God, Pidge, I will  _ never  _ leave you if I can help it. I leave once and then this happens. I will never let you hurt again.”

That awful feeling of going into his room and finding him gone was starting to pool in her stomach. It made her want to vomit, but she knew whatever she retched would've been blood. The blood was making woozy enough as it is. She didn't need to see it all over the floor.

Everyone had fought to come back and save her. They all need somebody to pilot the green lion. She's needed to do that. She can't die on her friends when the fate of the universe depends on them. Lotor is  _ not  _ going to rule for as long as she can live.

But judging by how tired she was and how breathing kind of hurt now, she wasn't sure that wouldn't be much longer.

The stab itself wasn't supposed to kill her. For one, Lotor had ordered Zethrid not to kill her. She had information they needed. She wasn't supposed to die from whatever injuries she was going to sustain. It was the second poke in her abdomen that had really caused her downfall. The second time had every intent to kill.

Also, the getting up and being in Lance's arms as he ran and extra, unnecessary movement. This was all adding up to the reason that she wasn't able to even think properly. Everything was blurring in and out of focus.

Her whole body was starting to go numb. She didn't feel anything anymore which wasn't a good thing. She just hoped and prayed to every deity she knew that she wasn't going into shock. Once she goes into shock, she's scared she won't make it the rest of the way.

“I have an idea,” her head did the best to perk up as Lance spoke. He sounded like he was faking being excited, but she pretended not to notice. Maybe she didn't really notice and it was her imagination. Who knows. “What if when we get back to the castle we have a game night?”

Pidge smiled at that thought. “Nice.”

“It'll give you something to look forward to,” Lance ran as fast as he could, not caring about her fragile state. Where was he going anyways? “You have something you want to do and now you won't fall asleep. You always call me a weak ass when I want to sleep whenever we play our games. Don't go to sleep and I'll stay awake until four in the morning playing with you.”

She weakly nodded her head. “We go sleep… At crazy times…”

“The craziest,” Lance smiled as if he were remembering a distant memory. “There was that time when we decided to play all night. Obviously we spent most of it just talking and messing around. I remember you getting a bruise on your leg because you smacked yourself against my bed post. We woke up and it looked like a hickey and I showered for like an hour because I kept imagining myself giving it to you and had to let it all out.”

While there were many comments she wanted to make about that, Pidge could only muster out one. “Gross…”

“You probably won't remember any of this anyways,” Lance chuckled once. “We were always up so late and spending so much time together. It's crazy how much time we were just wasting. We're only friends for now, sure. But we both know we're trying to go farther than that. And I'm not talking about that weird friends with a hint of something more thing we've had going on for a bit. I mean…”

“What?” Pidge's head starting lolling to the side. He had to gently shake her so her eyes wouldn't close. “You've always been… More than… A friend.”

It was becoming too much. She couldn't hold it in for much longer. Pidge's eyes started to close. She wasn't strong enough to stay awake or brave enough to tell Lance everything she needed to when she had the time.

Lance squinted in the distance. “I can see Red from here. Give it a couple more seconds and you'll be okay. Just hold on and stay awake for a little bit longer, hermosa. Please. Just one more second.”

But Pidge couldn't hold on for that second he desperately asked her to. She could feel Lance's shaking fingers go to her pulse point to check her as her eyes began to slip shut. There was no staying awake, and they both kind of knew this was going to be the outcome.

Pidge's eyelids became too heavy, and she slowly slipped into unconsciousness. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Somewhere next to them, Red landed, only one second too late. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh I'm waaaay more confident with this chapter than I was with the last one. 
> 
> And damn did the tangled season finale kill me


	10. last night i woke the fuck up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 4/20 I had to make weed joke even tho im highkey sad about this

Pidge isn't sure what the hell happened exactly when she wakes up.

She stumbles out of the pod, feet tripling over the other. Someone caught her before she hit the ground. She looked up to see a distraught looking Lance. But he holds her upright and embraces her.

“Hey,” Pidge greets. She was going to say more, but she was cut off my Lance pressing his mouth to hers. He had her partially dipped and was holding her as tight as he could. It intoxicated every part of her body.

A clear of the throat behind her made her realize that other people were indeed in the room with that. As distracting as Lance's kiss was, she focused in on everyone else there: Shiro, Keith, Allura and Hunk.

Shiro had a small grin on his face. “We'll let you two rekindle in a bit, but-”

“I love you.” Lance gave her such a soft look that made Pidge's knees slightly buckle. Shiro and everyone else in the room paused abruptly. He chuckled again as if his confession wasn't a big deal. “Heh, sorry I did that in front of everybody. I wasn't planning to. It just kinda… came out. Yeah.”

Meanwhile, Pidge was dying.

Her heart hammered in her chest. This was all dizzying. Then, Hunk surged forward and gave her a hug, as did everyone else. She could hear Lance groaning in protest, but she didn't pay all that much attention to him, instead focusing on trying to breathe from Hunk's hug.

“Sorry, I had to do something to cut the tension but god _ damnit Pidge,”  _ Hunk laughed as he hugged her. “Stop fucking dying!”

Shiro didn't even point out the foul language. “I mean, we all had to get a hug in.” They other four pulled away, all glancing at Lance with small smiles. Even Keith, who had been making serious heart eyes at Allura, was looking with pride at Lance.

“Didn't you know?” Pidge pretended to wipe dust off her shoulder, happy that her wrist is back in place. “I have a knack for unexpectedly almost dying. It's a Holt thing. I get it from my brother and dad.”

“Thank god you're fine,” Keith rolled his eyes playfully. “I don't know how I would've been able to tell Matt or your dad that you died. How anybody could have handled saying that you…” Keith trailed off in favor of looking at Lance.

Pidge hadn't forgotten his confession. In fact, she had done opposite. She kept replaying his words in her head. She remembered how Lance had looked at her. It was an expression that she had never seen on his face.

“I think we’ll leave you for now,” Allura was the one who ushered everybody out of the room, Keith giving her a not so subtle wink. He put his hand on Allura’s arm. What was up with them now?

“Pidge, look I-”

She interrupted him before he could finish his thought. “Please tell me that you’re not saying I love you as a sister.”

Lance looked confused, contrary to the soft face earlier. “What?”

“I dodged my feelings for you for a long time, Lance,” Pidge said quietly. “I need you to say in your own voice that you don’t love me like a best friend or a sister.”

“Huh?” Lance chuckled as he looked away from her. “Wait, you can’t be-”

Pidge put on a teasing smile. “Say it. I won’t believe you until you say it.”

Lance smiled at her. A real smile that she realized he used to always do around her before they got the stupid visions. “I love you, Katie. And I don't mean as a sister. I want more than friendship out of this. I want  _ you.” _

“You're smart,” Pidhe noted. “But you have to be pretty fucking stupid to like me.”

It was meant as a joke. Out of nowhere, Lance lifted her and started carrying her to her room. Here she was, huddled against him. She hadn't realized how tired she was. She felt so comfortable and warm in this position. There was a different kind of intimacy to it then what had carried them along the past days.

As soon as they got to her room, he set her down on her bed. He let her gently sit up, and then started to glare at her. Like, hardcore mad dogging her.

“What?” Pidge asked in confusion to the change in expressions.

“You almost died again,” Lance frowned. “First, stupid Ryner is possessed and we almost lose you. Then, I watch you literally die in my arms when help was seconds away in a dream. Yesterday, you got kidnapped, tortured I'm guessing, and stabbed. You were stabbed. How do I not get angry at you for that?”

Pidge started laughing. “Here I was, thinking you had changed your mind about me.” She laid down on her bed, scooting in closer to the wall. With the remaining space, Lance took occupancy. He wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face in her neck, sending shivers down her spine.

“I don't know what would've happened if I had ended up losing you, hermosa,” Lance spoke into the silence. “I had to deal with the grief so many times before this. Can you imagine how awful it was when you went on that solo quest to find your brother? Because I couldn't be there beside you when I wanted to be.”

“Hey,” Pidge touched his cheek. “Don't worry about that. I'm here now, aren't I? I doubt I'm going on solo missions for a while, anyways. I'll have you by my side for almost everything.”

It was Lance's insecurities talking. That's why he felt so helpless about this. She'd only ever had two, ahem,  _ experiences  _ with him, and already could tell which one of them was the dominant. Someone with as many self esteem issues as him wouldn't submit to somebody so easily.

“I know but,” Lance's eyes wandered from her face to the ceiling. “I can't stop thinking about what would've happened if we hadn't been able to save you in time. I know you're too stubborn to die so easily, so I thank every god that you fought to stay alive.”

“Well I mean,” Pidge sort of shrugged as best she could on the bed. “I don't even remember what happened after the stabbing-”

“So they  _ did  _ stab you,” Lance chuckled, looking back at her. “We didn't know if they stabbed you or shot you or what. We just saw a goddamn hole in your side. I tried to carry you but you cried out in pain and I didn't even know exactly what it was that was hurting and you were barely breathing so it's not like you could tell me anyways-”

“Lance?” Pidge grinned at him, one of her fingers tracing his lips. “Shut up.” She kissed him again, and despite this being the first time they've actually kissed in her bed, nothing about this was lustful. It was sweet and soft.

Is this what a boyfriend kisses like? Because if it is, then Pidge is more than one hundred percent okay with it being like this all the time.

*

“Paladin,” Lotor smirked at her, a blaster in his hand. He pointed it straight to her abdomen. “I wanted to do this the first time. I couldn't kill you but my imbecile goons got you taken back. My plan for domination of the universe is delayed, unfortunately.”

Pidge hit her head against the cell, a wave of pain rolling off of her. She had forgotten about the new cut Lotor had given her head. She almost blacked out then and there. “Just tell me what you want.”

“I want to know where exactly the other paladins are at,” Lotor moved his aim and twirled the gun in his hands. “That's all I ask. Believe me, I can ask for worse. You haven't seen it when I'm at my lowest. I've got nothing left to lose. I will hurt you beyond what you think is possible.”

Despite trying to look brave, Pidge couldn't even make it an effort to act the part. She couldn't glance down at her thigh with the knife sticking out of it. The blood around the wound made her too dizzy. Her wrist was broken with her other shoulder dislocated. “That's the one question I was hoping you wouldn't ask.”

“Oh?” Lotor raised an eyebrow at her, his hands trailing her good leg. “And why exactly is that?”

“Because you can't threaten my friends,” Pidge tried to spit, but all she ended up doing was swooshing blood around her mouth. It was like there wasn't even saliva in her system anymore. Her whole body at this point only seemed to be able to pick up on pain.

“Let me guess,” Lotor tipped her chin with the edge of his blaster. “There's one of them on that team or whatever you guys call yourselves that you care for more than the others? Let me take a guess, the yellow one?”

When she didn't react all that much, he kept going. “Hmm, one of them isn't even helping you guys anymore and is off with that stupid rebel group. The pink one? Or is she blue? You guys should organize your colors. You're confusing everybody.”

“The only reason you're confused,” Pidge smiled, trying to keep her head off of the wall. “Is because you're too stupid to comprehend the meaning behind the specific colors. Like pink, for example.”

Lotor laughed. Full on throwing his head back laughter. It was eerie and didn't sit right with her. “I'm surprised you didn't recognize it from the ears. Or even from what your friend Allura said she saw in her future. I'm Altean, so I know the full meaning on why she chose the color pink.”

“You're  _ Altean?”  _ Pidge responded to this poorly, which must've been bad because of the flash of hatred in Lotor's eyes. But the blood loss is getting to her and she can't think right. “Damn, here I was thinking you're American…”

Quoting vines while on the verge of death and arguing with an evil space prince probably wasn't a good idea.

Somehow, Pidge could hear the faint whisper of her name. She didn't think anything of it until she felt the shaking. Her whole body started to tremble as the feeling of pain became worse. The soreness she felt in her legs and arms cramped up. Maybe she was going into shock and that's why her body started shaking.  

“They destroyed Altea,” Pidge tried reasoning, shutting her eyes as tears brimmed them. “What are you doing that's so much different from your dad? How are you and Zarkon going to be different leaders when you both murder?”

Lotor slammed his fist down on her good thigh, making her scream. She tried to take note on the now frantic whisper of her name coming from somewhere, but she couldn't pinpoint where. She could only focus on the fact that her muscles in her thigh were probably shattered.

“I'm going to ask you again,” Lotor repeated calmly. “Where are the rest of the paladins?”

Pidge couldn't talk. She couldn't do anything. Her legs were throbbing. Her arms were aching with the need for her bones to be put back in their proper place. She was starting to surrender, her fight to stay alive slowly losing.

“Don't get shy on me now,” Lotor chuckled, aiming his blaster at her chest. “I need to hear you speak so I know you hear me. Once I'm the leader of the universe, you'll have no choice but to follow what I say.”

“It's my job to defend it,” Pidge's head lolled to the side, unable to stay upright.

“Not for long.”

Pidge was about to ask what the hell that meant before she started closing her eyes. Damn, it's a shame. She always imagined dying heroically on the battlefield or in the final battle against Zarkon. Never by herself while Zarkon Jr. threatened to kill her in some jail cell that no one would find anyways.

Even worse, she'd never gotten the chance to confess to Lance.

It didn't come as a surprise to Pidge when Lotor shot her point blank on her chest, but she jerked up in her bed, she was pretty shocked to figure out where that weird whisperer came from. Lance was staring at her, wide eyed.

Pidge's breathing was heavy. She patted her leg, which was still in the white pod clothing. She didn't feel a knife or a nice hole in her chest, so she appreciated that. She hadn't even realized she was crying until Lance gently wiped them with his thumb.

“Hey,” Lance softened his gaze from panicked to loving. That's a look she could get used to. “What happened, hermosa?”

She turned her head. It's not uncommon for anyone on the ship to have nightmares. She just felt bad about the fact that they were both sound asleep and she ended up waking them. She knows it wasn't her fault and that the nightmares just decided to plague her, but still.

“Pidge, please,” Lance turned her gently by the head, but she flinched away when it reminded her of how Lotor had done it with his gun. “Was it a nightmare?”

Despite how difficult she was being, Lance wasn't frustrated. His voice was soft and gentle. He didn't sound at all the way she would've expected him to be. Instead, he was patient and ready to be by her side.

She already knew the way he felt. She didn't always know, sure, but she wasn't going to try to deny him or test how true his feelings are to her. He didn't deserve that. She knew what their feelings for each other were. Even a stupid vision was able to see that.

Slowly, Pidge nodded. If they were going to be together for real, she had to get way more used to opening up to people, even if she always allowed herself to be vulnerable around him. “I was back in whatever that place was. I saw Lotor again, just without the other two alien girls.”

“Lotor's his name,” Lance grinded his teeth. “You told me before you were knocked out. I didn't know if you were blubbering anything, because that happened at one point. Anyways, we didn't exactly get the chance to chat with him. Not even an evil villain monologue where he tells us what happened.”

“His two helpers, to say the least, were Ezor and Zethrid,” Pidge began to recount the situation. “He's Zarkon's son. He had plans to execute us publically. He was going to use me against you guys to capture everyone. How was I supposed to let that happen?”

“Don't worry,” Lance pressed his face into her neck. “If he ever comes near us again, I'll make sure he fucking gets what he deserves."

Pidge appreciated the thought, and she's sure everyone else agreed with that statement. She smiled at him. “I just don't understand how you were able to find me.”

“Allura,” Lance confirmed. “She used the quintessence in your body and Hunk for some weird thing where he matched them up and it led us to you. I almost ripped everyone's head off until I saw you again. Hunk and Keith didn't even go with us when we saved you for worst case scenario and we needed a pod prepared.”

“Which you did need.”

“Which we did need!” Lance laughed to himself before turning back towards her again, a serious expression on his face. “Look, I really need to say I'm sorry. I overreacted for majority of everything since the vision. It just gave me hope after seeing it that you might like me too and I lashed out every time someone diminished it.”

“You're fought to get me back and pretty much threatened to kill the people who captured me,” Pidge joked. “I'll say that as long as you don't leave me again, we're okay. Although I'm sorry too for being oblivious as hell and indirectly hurting you. Shiro even talked to me about it and I  _ still _ didn't see it and-”

“Katie,” Lance put his fingers on her lips, sending shivers down her spine. “If I wasn't such a loverboy or whatever you guys call me, maybe you would've taken my advances seriously. I was always super crass and looking back at it, I can't one hundred percent blame you.”

“I can't blame you either,” Pidge reminded. “I was so scared of rejection that I literally rejected our chance to be together sooner. I realize now that I had nothing to be scared about. I forced myself to believe that you didn't like me. I was obtuse for a while, don't get me wrong. But it wasn't until Keith called me out one day that I realized it is all denial.”

“I should've told you a long time ago that I'm in love with you,” Lance admitted. “Hey, we might've been able to tell your brother last time we called him. Remember that? What do you think? Wonder if he'll approve of me dating his baby sister. Oh man, imagine you rolling up with this big ass hickey on your-”

Pidge realized with wide eyes that she should probably put a stop to wherever Lance was going with that. “Have you guys told Matt what happened yet? I know he'll be mega pissed off if he finds out somewhere else.”

“We called him as soon as you got back and we had you in a pod,” Lance looked up as if remembering something. “He was with James and my sister at the time. Yeah, he was pretty spooked. He kept yelling until James got him under control. I'm pretty sure someone else called him at this point, but you should give him a wave and smile at some point just so he doesn't rip our heads off.”

“What was this I heard about you earlier?” Pidge raised an eyebrow in a teasing manner. “About you just getting mad at everybody? I mean, you said some vulgar things. I can't imagine you getting up on my brother of all people about being angry.”

“Here's the difference you have failed to see,” Lance smiled at his own joke. “I am allowed to freak out over you because I didn't want to lose you. Now, look, your brother has every right to react the same way. But, while I simply want to kill the son of a bitch who hurt you, Matt needs to throw hands at somebody. That would be us. We'd be catching those hands.”

Pidge laughed unattractively at the thought of Matt even attempting to fight anyone. Especially someone as built as Lance. She threw her head back and scrunched her whole face together, but when she opened her eyes, she saw him staring at her with a dopey smile.

While she for sure doesn't mind it, she's just very confused. How did she manage to make that smile appear on his face? What about her makes him like this? She's not bringing herself down, but is instead curious. And the curiosity got the better of her.

“What about me do you like?” Pidge asked, bopping his nose in a joking manner. “I know you adore me and all, but what exactly caused these feelings to come to the surface?”

Lance let out a sigh like a lovesick puppy, his grin never leaving his face. “The first thing I fell for was your smile. I don't know what it was, but something about your smile. Then your laugh. It made me so happy every time you laughed, especially because it was me making you laugh. Then I dunno. From there I just fell for the rest of you.”

“That's interesting,” Pidge noted. She liked the extra reassurance of him saying exactly what he likes about her. He rolled her eyes when that was her only comment.

“I just poured my heart out when the only other person I've said that to is Keith,” Lance waved a finger at her. “And all that you have to say about that interesting? Not even a ‘that's cute' or ‘aw Lance how adorable let's run off into the sunset together'? Wow, real cold.”

“Keith?” Pidge asked. “Why'd you tell Keith of all people? Not even Hunk?”

Lance rubbed the back of his neck. “Hunk and Shiro and Ke- just about everyone but you knew that I liked you. I never elaborated it to anyone until you got captured. I asked Keith if you and him were anything and then I named everything about you that I like and Keith laughed at me because I was being stupid apparently.”

“That  _ is  _ plain stupid,” Pidge teased. “How could you even begin to think that I would ever like Keith out of everyone? I know options on this ship are low but holy crap I didn't think you would think I like Keith. Did he tell you about what he saw in his vision?”

“He had a vision?”

“Forget I said anything.”

When Lance laughed again, he focused in on her face. “You know, I hated seeing you with Keith. I know you guys were just friends now. I would always freak out because like I said, the vision gave me hope and I got angry every time something didn't add up. I didn't mean to take it out on you, and I'm sorry for making you feel like you couldn't rely on me.”

Pidge touched the hairs at the back of his neck, noting his reaction. “We're okay now. We're doing this for real. The communication part of this is so important. At least we're talking about it now. We really needed to.”

They stayed silent for a couple of seconds simply staring at each other. She loved the way his face looked, as weird as that could sound. His entire gaze was focused on her and her only. How was her heart not supposed to go crazy after something like that? “I do have one question. The first time we kissed, why did you run away from me after?”

Lance turned into a red, blushing mess while having a coughing fit. Damn, the answer couldn't have been that bad. “In case you didn't know, you're one hell of a girl. Too much of a girl. Because once I knew how good you felt,” he winced slightly at his own wording. “I ended up popping a boner. I was more than mortified at myself, so I left. How embarrassing if you knew my body was responding to yours in that way?”

Pidge slightly chuckled. “Damn, you shouldn't have left. While I might have not known what the hell to do with a boner, we probably would've saved so much time. We could've been together way sooner.”

“Probably,” Lance pulled her closer, embracing her in a hug. Their fingers interlocked. The small caresses, she learned, were her favorite. “I've been thinking a lot lately about how we first met. Wouldn't you say it was super romantic?”

“Ah, yes,” Pidge pretended to reminisce. “I too have such a fond memory of you not even knowing I was female while our teacher told us off because we were using the wrong hand in a simple greeting of hello.”

“Exactly!” Lance buried his face in her hair. “See, now you get it.”

“You have no idea how hard it was to watch you flirt with so many girls at the Garrison,” Pidge admitted. “I didn't know it was a crush at the time, but I had freaking fallen for you pretty hard. Then we came here and I thought you were in love with Allura until recently-”

“Wanna know a fun fact?” Lance interrupted. “You made me question my sexuality on  _ several  _ occasions. Like one time during longue time, you wore a pair of sweatpants instead of your cargo pants. Your ass looked fan freaking tastic and I couldn't think straight. Literally.”

“I get it,” Pidge jokingly threw a smile in his direction. “I'm literally so gorgeous and you can't resist looking at me and my fantastic ass. Considering I've been jumped three times now, I'd say the effect never wore off.”

“Please,” Lance rolled his eyes. “I think you got more beautiful as time went on. For one, your ass is amazing. You started growing your hair out more and while I loved you even with short hair, I adore it while it's long. Plus at least now your glasses are proportional to the rest of your face. They fit better.”

“Ah, shucks,” Pidge leaned into him. “Hey, Lance?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“Hermosa, I love you too.”

*

The next day, everyone else was literally waiting for Pidge and Lance in the kitchen. They had ended up traveling down their together, hand in hand. That's definitely something they can do now. Pidge still felt her heart race every time he so much as looked at her.

“So,” Shiro questioned. “What exactly are we looking at here?”

Lance stood in front of Shiro as if to challenge the older man. He didn't even let go of her hand. “You're looking at a brand new couple. Any objections?”

Keith tried to flex his muscles. “Well, son. Dating someone who's practically my sister won't come that easily. I have a few questions I need to ask before I allow you canoodlers to do whatever you wish.”

“As if I'm not getting this lecture from Matt,” Lance roller his eyes. “Alright, I had this coming after all the arguing. Do your  _ worst.” _

Keith narrowed his eyes. “Good paying job?”

“Yes, sir."

“Interested in a family?”

“Obviously, sir.”

Pidge smiled at that. Just the thought of one day having some kind of family or even the fact that he'd want to stay with her for so long made her heart swell up. She's storing this information for later. To tease.

“Sound proof walls so I don't have to hear you guys banging?”

“I won't even answer that for the sake of Shiro.”

“Insurance?”

“The general, sir.”

“Hotel?”

“Trivago.”

Keith smiled like he was satisfied. “Okay, you have my blessing. I can't say for sure that you'll be able to use the power of memes against Matt, but nothing should be that bad.”

Shiro nodded in agreement. “I knew the kid before we even left for space. He was pretty much a twig back then. Don't worry, Lance. You'll be fine. The worst Matt could do is bore you to death with facts, though I'm very surprised Pidge hasn't done that already.”

When she was about to argue that she doesn't bore but instead educates, plus Matt is way more built now than before and could easily put up a good fight, Hunk cut through her thoughts. “Am I the only one who didn't know Pidge's brother before puberty?”

Allura and Keith both raised their hands, looked at each other, held eye contact, then turned away with blushes on their faces. Pidge narrowed her eyes and pointed to the both of them, thankful for the subject change from her brother. “I've only been out of the healing pod for a day and I've noticed something weird happening here. What's going on?”

Keith let out a little puff of breath he was holding in. “For how stupid you were while your own relationship was progressing, you're sure good at picking up what other people are feeling.”

“That was not what I asked,” Pidge sat down in front of Keith and Allura, Lance standing protectively behind the chair she was sitting on. “I want to know what happened here.”

“Well,” Allura wouldn't meet her eyes, fidgeting with her hands. “Keith was stressing out and I felt really bad. I tried to help him cheer up and one thing led to another,” they sheepishly glanced at each other. “We were planning on telling you guys, I swear. The moment just wasn't right because Pidge woke up and then Lance confessed and-”

“We'll talk about your lack of morals later,” Shiro made it a point to roll his eyes. “For now, the spotlight is on Pidge and Lance. I want to hear exactly how all of this happened.”

Hunk groaned. “Ugh, I don't.”

It wasn't until then that Keith started laughing. He held his hand out, waiting. When Lance started talking, she saw Hunk put a pile of silver coins into Keith's palm, who was grinning and celebrating to himself.

Pidge interrupted Lance while he was talking about their kiss while she was under the drug. “What exactly did I see? Is there some kind of space weed that only Keith deals that I haven't been apart of?”

“You're the worst person in the world to even take medicine,” Lance pointed out, shaking his head and smiling. “I highly doubt you'd ever smoke weed. Anyways, my lovely girlfriend,” cue eye roll. “Saw something suspicious going on around these areas. If I know she can kick me butt, then you can bet she'll kick yours.”

Hunk, being the terrible liar he is, winced as soon as her eyes landed on him. “Okay, don't be mad. Me and Keith placed a bet on when you'd get together. Me, being the stupid person I am, guessed you guys wouldn't do anything until we landed back on earth. I don't know, I should've seen this coming.”

“I'll be completely honest,” Lance put his hands on her shoulders. “If I had participated in this bet, I probably would've said never. We had a rough couple of days. That vision really sparked some things within us. I don't think we would've gotten together without it, though.”

Pidge feigned offense. “You mean Lance McClain, who makes on every girl and thing who can breathe, wasn't going to be bold and flirt with me until I saw your feelings?”

“I flirted with you all the time!” Lance protested. “You just never saw it.”

It was innocent enough, but  _ god  _ the way he looked at her. She absolutely adored the way he would soften his facial expression from anyone else to her. She's the only one who he has eyes for. That's a pretty good accomplishment from someone who's a loverboy.

They had finally done it. The weird vision that turned into sexual tension was gone, with them kissing in her bed and not an ounce of lust was in it. A dream of her dying had been made a reality when he didn't know if he had died in his freaking arms or not. Jealousy ranging from her thinking he still had a crush on Allura to him throwing bitch fits every time she was near Keith. They've come back from it all, and that seems to be the most important part.

Lance grabbed her arm and took her out of the kitchen. The others gave them knowing looks. They really think anything is going to happen on the outside of a freaking  _ door?  _ Then again, things had escalated pretty quickly in the lion.

Once outside, Lance pushed her against the wall, taking Pidge by surprise. He chuckled at her surprise. “I get to kiss you now whenever I want. I can do that now since you're my girlfriend.”

“Dork,” Pidge said as he cupped her face, kissing her. He could do this as many times as he wanted and she'd probably be breathless every time. “But I know you love me..” She mumbled against his lips.

“Hey, I get to openly love the person I've been pinning for,” Lance shrugged, his hair getting in his face. “This started with a stupid vision, nearly destroyed my friendship with one of my favorite people, but at least now it ends with me being with said person.”

“Damn,” Pidge tried not to laugh because of his morning stubble slightly scratching her. “You are such a sap.”

“Only when you're involved, hermosa.”

Pidge's breath caught in her throat as Lance pressed his lips to hers. And hey, a stupid vision might've almost ended everything, but at least now he can call her hermosa amongst many other things.

Many,  _ many  _ other things. Because they're dating now and that's absolutely okay. Everything is going to be okay.

“Hey Lance?”

“Yeah?”

“When we get back to earth, what  _ are _ we going to do?”

“Forever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaand we have concluded. 
> 
> This was fun to write lol. 
> 
> Damm I'm all sad now cause I finished both stories I was working on and cheer season ended what do I do man ughh. 
> 
> At least she ra and endgame come out next week. 
> 
> I don't even wanna finish this note cause imna be so sad :( nooooooo
> 
> Here comes the stressed goodbye to this story's version of Pidge and Lance. 
> 
> ...goodbye book :(

**Author's Note:**

> Follow my Tumblr - soleaa
> 
> :)


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